Either I find a solution or I'll have to stop play dates at our house, or going anywhere where there are groups of children...
My ds seems incapable of playing well with groups of other children. If he goes to another house on a one to one playdate he generally behaves impecably (until I go to pick him up when he moans, but that's normal....). Parents at the playdate generally comment on what a lovely, well behaved, polite child he is (probably surprised I think).
BUT, when we say, go to the park and meet up with other children, or go to someone's house where the are more than 2 other kids, the time is spent with other children coming up to me saying "DS has just ........... me (called names, hit, pushed etc etc). He is always very ready to blame everyone else for what has happened and is always distraught about it, but just cannot see that he is causing the commotion.
This has been going on for a few years now, with no real improvement. I've read books, looked on here, done a positive parenting course, you name it, but still can't get to the bottom of this behaviour.
After the last outing - Sunday afternoon at a friends with 5 or 6 other kids - I am just ready to cry. He just seems to make himself unpopular.
His personality is definitely better for one-to-one friendships, but he even abuses his "best" friend at times.
I don't want him to be mr unpopular for ever, and, selfishly, I don't want to have to give up meeting up with friends (mind you they are getting bored with my repeated moaning I think).
any ideas?