My niece hates me

[Lou8280]

I'm looking for some advice and really just somewhere to vent. I've been with my boyfriend for 10 years, he now has 2 nieces one 1 and the other is 4. He has a close bond with the both of them but especially the 4 year old. I'm sure the 4 year old hates me, we take her overnight most weekends and it starts off good but by the end of the night she's telling me I'm not allowed to do anything, I'm not allowed to talk, she's only going to play and talk to my boyfriend and she'll only listen to him. She occasionally tells me to go away and if anything goes wrong even if it's him that does it, it's my fault. I know she's jealous, and I know she's only 4 but it doesn't make it any easier. He says she's like that with everyone when he's around. Maybe I'm being too sensitive but it's getting harder and harder, I sometimes feel like just walking away, as I feel like if it came down to it I'd lose, he'd pick his niece over me which in a way I can understand as she's family and I child, I know I'm being unreasonable I just can't help feeling like this. It's constant, I've tried talking to him but I don't think he understands. Thanks for taking the time to read.

Well she's not really your niece if her uncle is just your boyfriend, no matter how long you've been together. Maybe ease off a little bit and you'll be less of an irritant to her.
The fact that you let her childish behaviour (because she's a child) bother probably shows and that probably puts her off you even more. Maybe try giving them dome on 1 on 1 time occasionally might help. And don't show offence when she's mean yo you.
You could also ask your BF to gently tell her it's not kind to tell you to go away, etc. if he doesn't already.

She doesn't hate you, she's 4. She's known you all her life, presumably she was fine when she was smaller.

Your boyfriend needs to be involved here and sort this out. You and he together need to be clear on what your behaviour rules are when she is staying with you. So it might be that being rude and unkind is not something you will tolerate, so if she speaks to you like that, both you and your boyfriend need to follow through with consequences. Both of you together having the same rules and both being involved in disciplining her.