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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

getting rid of dummy......some advice/strategies please

21 replies

queenrollo · 05/07/2007 20:46

ds is nearly two and i'm keen to remove his dummy.....he will go without it quite happily if he is playing/active/distracted......but if he is sat, eiher at home on the sofa or in his pushchair and hasn't got his dummy he sucks and chews the top of his coat/t-shirt and makes it soaking wet.

he won't settle at night without it but at the moment i'd be happy just cutting out daytime use.

has anybody got any words of wisdom to help me with this?

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NoodleStroodle · 05/07/2007 20:52

Cold turkey.
Throw em all away.

DoubleBluff · 05/07/2007 20:53

Cold turkey is the only way i am afriad. A day or two and it will be done.

angelgabriel · 05/07/2007 20:55

I don't know if this is helpful - its a bit radical! My ds was 3 when he finally gave up - I got so fed up with him one day torturing his new baby sister I threatened to cut up his precious gobstopper - he carried on being beastly so I had to carry out my threat. He cried that night, but we've never looked back!

Original poster

queenrollo · 05/07/2007 20:58

cold turkey.............right, will have a word with dp about when to implement it.

thankyou for your advice.

OP posts:

1Troll · 05/07/2007 21:04

No magic answer for a 2 year old am afraid but left it til DD1 was three and she asked for a Barbie DVD. Fair swap for her dummies I would say and it was instantaneous.

If you want a laugh read Anne Tyler's Digging to America novel where they have a Binkie Party to say goodbye to the dummies for her daughter-excellent book and your post made me smile remembering this scene. Good luck

DoubleBluff · 05/07/2007 21:06

At friends nursery they had a 'dummy' xmas tree. All the kids put their dummies on there and got a present the neext day.

cherrycake · 05/07/2007 21:09

DD was 2 and half when we talked about it, and she was happy to give it to another baby (!) as she was so grown up now (!). She helped me put it in an envelope and we posted it off...so she believed. Not a prob after that. (though I secretly kept her fave one in case it all went wrong!)
Good luck, its prob not as bad as you fear.

SleeplessInTheStaceym11House · 05/07/2007 21:22

dd wasn't quite 2 when we got rid of hers.
here was our plan:

Step 1: GO on a dummy hunt (you'll be amazed where they hide these things)

Step 2: Tell them that the dummy fairy (ok for a boy solidier/knight etc) was coming to take all the dummies away to all the babies in the world that need them! And if they go to bed like a good girl/boy then mummy will tell the dummy fairy/solidier/knight will leave them a present.

Step 3: Give present in morning if good, do not if not, if not keep telling if good at night then present in morning.

Step 4: stickers everyday for 7 days

Step 5: present after 7 days!

Step 6 stickers for say another 10 days

etc etc. they forget eventually (dd only had the 2 presents one first day 2nd 7th day, she forgot soon after!)

hope that helps!

calordan · 05/07/2007 21:28

told dd2 dummy fairy would come in the night and bring doll from barbie brincess and the pauper, should point out I didnt realise that this was the sought after toy at the time and cost me £30 off ebay,

before she woke up, sneaked in stole dunny, and slid quite large box under pillow. She grunted a little bit next night, but ok after that

BibiThree · 05/07/2007 21:29

We told dd (who was about 19 months iifc) that all the new babies needed them and did it the same time we changed her cot into a bed, to reinforce she was a "big girl" and got a special new bed for not being a baby anymore.

Then we collected all her dummies up in a bag and took them to the postbox to "send" to the new babies so she physically saw them going. (I did a bit of slight of hand and actually put them in my bag then in the bin, but it worked).

We had about a week of unsettled nights, but nothing terrible and she's not looked back since.

BibiThree · 05/07/2007 21:30

Or maybe it was more like 22 months actually...

mrsmousemat · 05/07/2007 21:42

They wear out eventually - sucking a flat dummy is no pleasure.

So just let nature take it's course.

SleeplessInTheStaceym11House · 05/07/2007 21:43

my friend said that acctually, pierce a hole in it, her ds said 'mummy broken' and se told him they all were and he didnt want one!

calordan · 05/07/2007 21:44

there is always the dummy bird that comes and snips the dummy

LowFatMilkshake · 05/07/2007 21:45

We've got rid of ours in the day time. We give DD a pot to put hers in and she does it every monring after brushing her teeth. But like a smoker getting a last drag (not that I would know) she has a long hard suck first.

She's nearly 4 . We've tried everything to get rid of it at night, even the dentist told her she would get big strong teeth without it. And we've got a glowing winged fairy to give her (which she knows about) when she does it.

So I will watch this thread and see what other advice you get.

Fodders · 05/07/2007 22:19

...reading these makes me feel I was quite mean to dd1. :-(

With DD (aged 2.5yrs) I chose a really cool new cup - W-the-P and a curly straw = V exciting....bought it and when we got home put it away in a cupboard and then I told her she could have it when she threw her dummies in the bin. Made sure she got to see the cup and was reminded of the deal a few times...but was shocked when she chucked them in the bin herself within the week!

...we sweetened the pill by doing a tooth-fairy thing - so when she returned to bed from her trip to the bin, there was a toy from the dummy fairy - - which BROKE within minutes so had to be replaced with another emergency dummy-fairy-toy whilst she went to the loo

she got to use the new cup the next day

...a very very exciting evening that she recalls quite clearly, one year on!

admylin · 05/07/2007 22:28

That dummy xma stree sound sadorable! My ds loved his dummy and kept it 'til he was 3 - one night he was so tired after a brilliant day out that he just forgot it and fell asleep so we all congratulated him for being a big boy and celebrated the next morning, we didn't give him a chance to realise it was a mistake so he was proud.

scully · 06/07/2007 11:38

dd1 was 2.8 when we took hers away. We told her what was going to happen, and timed it with Xmas so that Father Xmas took her dummys away and left her a present in return for giving them up. Her first sleep without it Xmas morning as a bit traumatic, but after that she was fine.

chel86 · 06/07/2007 14:05

My DS went cold turkey at 3, BUT he did leave them out for good old Father Christmas to look after with his mince pies!!

It worked for a day, then he found an old one (whoops!). But after he saw me throw it in the bin and I showed him that other children don't have them then he was fine.

softmusk · 06/07/2007 19:34

first i made my dd's but them on there pillow in morning and thats where they stayed and if they wanted them they had to go up to bed have a suck and come back down soon got feed up with that

then took to toy shop and told them they had to give them to lady there and she would give them any toy they want shop played along and so far so good it been 2 weeks dd1 2.6 and dd2 18m

hope it goes well

Original poster

queenrollo · 06/07/2007 21:44

we're going to leave it for now.....

we've just bought a cotbed to put at the in laws and we need to get him used to sleeping there (and also to go to bed for his nanny, he will only settle for me and dp)....and we think trying to do this without him having the comfort of his dummy is just too much.

i hid it out of sight this morning while he brushed hid teeth and he didn't notice until after lunch when he was ready for his nap.....so i think i'll keep doing that for now.

thankyou very much for all your advice.....

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