When / how did you start to discipline your kids?

[BCFirstTimeMum]

Hi all,

I’m a first time mum.
My LO is 9 months and someone said the other day that now is the best time to start disciplining and teaching them right and wrong and no etc.

What are your experiences with this? When did your LOs understand NO? What did you implement with teaching them right or wrong... naughty step / time out etc?

I still feel he is quite young to discipline but I do think starting to teach him no isn’t a bad idea. He is becoming such a cheeky monkey 🙈

He is always pulling hair and poking faces but to the point where it’s so painful and leaves marks! Have any of you experienced this and is it just a phase?!

Any tips and thoughts would be greatly appreciated!

Thank you x

It's very normal behaviour. What's more important is how you respond. A simple. Please don't do that it hurts. And keep a straight face is a lot more beneficial than a no! As babies love reactions and he'll do it more. Something to always keep in mind is how you react to your child's behaviour. Everything babies do isn't to be "naughty." It's normal behaviour that teaches them about interaction and effect. "What's going to happen if I do this." A really good tip is also explaining to your child about what it is you don't want them to do. Ex: crawling to touch the bin. Instead of no! You look at them eye to eye and say "please don't touch that. It's very dirty. Let's move away." With consistency and always taking to them with that type of respect, well you'll see a huge difference in your child's behaviour vs other kids who's moms just yell no! Or naughty! As they don't learn anything and they don't understand what they've done wrong. You can begin to explain things to your child now. With the hair pulling or hitting. As I said a simple "I won't allow you to pull her hair, let's move away." Is a good start. My son is 16 months and he was trying to push the oven buttons. I went up to him and told him "please don't touch that, that's dangerous." In a very stern voice. Well he did it again. I said "please don't touch that. If you do that again I won't let you be in the kitchen with me. Well he did it again 😂 so I went up to him and in a very just calm and stern voice I said to him "I'm going to remove you from the kitchen now because I've asked you not to touch that." And I closed the kitchen door and he was not allowed in. He cried so I finally let him after a few minutes. He walked over to the oven looked me and pushed the button lol! So I did the exact same thing. Told him I was not going to allow him to touch the oven and took him out. He cried even louder and this time I didn't let him in for about 19 minutes. Finally I let him in and it's safe to say he does not touch it or go near it. I don't yell and get angry. Idk if this helps but i hope it has a little lol

I think it also really helps to think about discipline as something positive which you instil in your child, not something you do to them. Discipline doesn't need to mean punishment.

I think a lot of what many people deem "bad behaviour" is either curiosity and exploration or a demonstration of their feelings and personally, I don't think punishment really works in either of those situations.

Following the general approach of lovely36 above I have 13 and 9 year old sons who are lovely, co-operative people. Spending time patiently explaining something (again and again...) or doing what lovely did re the oven does take a little more parental input but I think it really pays off.