My DD is nearly 3 and a very curious and chatty little girl, she’s also a bit of a worrier. Sadly her uncle (on my side) and aunt (on DH’s side) both passed away in their early twenties, more than 10 years before she was born. We have pictures of them in the house and she knows their names but I get the feeling that before long we may get questions about where they are (especially as she has other uncles and aunts).
She’s asked about grandparents’ parents before and it was explained very simply that they’re not here any more because they died (we’re not religious so the explanation didn’t go further than that that). My concern is that she might be a bit worried by the fact that they were both so young, as I think it’s easier to talk about death of elderly relatives (they got very old and body stopped working etc.). Also if she asks how they died we’re not really sure how to explain in a way that isn’t frightening. One died in a car accident and the other of an accidental overdose, so not sure whether we should say they died in accidents? But would that make her scared? (She’s also likely ask what kind of accident) I know we need to keep it as simple as possible at her age but I’m not sure how to give a basic explanation that’s also truthful.
There’s a lot online about how to speak about death in relation to a recent bereavement but nothing about how to speak about relatives who died before they were born. Any advice would be very welcome, especially if anyone’s faced a similar situation.