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13 month not talking

17 replies

lovemyprince · 16/11/2018 21:09

My little boy is 13 month on the 19th and he's not saying any words at all it will sound as if he says mam every now and then and sometimes sound like he's he's saying mamamam when he's crying and kicking of I have spoke 2 my health visitor an she said that as long as he's got quite tuneful babbling then not to worry but I can't help but worry I always talk 2 him and repeat words 2 him before I give him it like dummy or juice or ball and things like that if I tell him to pass me the ball he will I always tell him what I'm doing I always sing to him before he goes to sleep and the past week have started reading him a story before he goes to bed as well but is there anything else I can do to try and encourage him to say some words? He's getting close to walking he can take 2 or 3 steps on his own steps on his own then will quickly grab hold of something has been doing that nearly 2 weeks how long do you think it will be before he's walking on his own?

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HeyJupiter · 16/11/2018 21:23

If you ask him “where is mummy/cup/ball etc?” does he look or point in that direction? Receptive language like that is almost more important at this age. Gestures like pointing, giving or showing are all part of that communication development too. My DS is nearly 12 months and no words here either!

lovemyprince · 16/11/2018 22:00

He doesn't point he just laughs whenever I point haha but he looks in the direction of things he understands what I'm saying he knows what I'm saying

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Carmen99 · 17/11/2018 09:23

Sounds like you are doing all the right things. Talk to him as much as u can, read to him lots, sing to him. X

HeyJupiter · 17/11/2018 09:55

That’s a great start! 13 months is still very young, plenty of time before you need to worry.

lovemyprince · 17/11/2018 11:23

The health visitor has said not to worry because he has plenty of tuneful babbling but I just can't help but worry xx

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HeyJupiter · 17/11/2018 15:03

I would totally go with your Hv on this one. Give it a couple of months before you start worrying x

lovemyprince · 17/11/2018 16:59

@HeyJupiter thanks I can't help it I was a worrier before I fell pregnant I'm 1000x worse since falling pregnant with him he said not to worry as I'm doing everything right but I just feel like I'm doing something wrong

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ElyElyOy · 17/11/2018 19:14

Your baby sounds fine but I understand the worry.

Maybe look at a baby babble or baby signing class near you. They are more about having fun, but it might help you feel better and more in control :)

HeyJupiter · 17/11/2018 21:24

Op, do you think you might be suffering from postnatal anxiety? I mean that kindly as I’m the same and have been very consumed with worry since my son was about three weeks old. It’s exhausting and debilitating. Sorry if I’m way off x

lovemyprince · 18/11/2018 08:40

@HeyJupiter I do nothing but worry I was really bad for worrying about him for the first few month to the point where a was nearly driving me self crazy I still worry quite a bit about things he's not doing yet or when he starts school is he going to be alright even though he's only 13 month old the health visitor has told me not to worry about him not talking yet but I really can't help it i feel as though I'm doing something wrong because he's not saying any words yet and there's other kids who are younger than him who are saying a couple of words I shouldn't compare to other kids because I know every baby is different and develop at their own speed but I can't help it

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HeyJupiter · 18/11/2018 11:13

That’s the anxiety... if even when health professionals reassure you, you still feel awful, then it means that you need some help with the worry. Maybe have a chat to your GP? I’ve had some counselling to talk about my fears and that helped massively. I still get very scared (and for some reason I’ve always had an irrational worry my son has autism!) and those thoughts consume me, but I’m a bit better at batting them away now.

It’s very wearing and exhausting and you have all my sympathy.

Oh and the normal range for talking goes up
to 16/17 months I think so still so much time. Honestly xx

lovemyprince · 18/11/2018 13:00

@HeyJupiter thank you I know you worry as a parent anyway but I just can't help but really worry that he's missed a milestone or that I'm doing something wrong and stuff even when I talk 2 the health visitor and stuff and I'm already dreading him starting school and he's only 13 months haha I can't help it though xx

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chelle85 · 18/11/2018 13:24

I know exactly how you feel. My son is 15mths and still not saying anything. He looks in the direction of things when you ask where they are but doesn't bring me things when asked, doesn't respond to simple commands like "Come Here" and only turns to his name maybe one time in 10. He points and 'shouts' at what he wants but he doesn't use other gestures like waving. I'm really worried about autism too as he doesn't make much eye contact either and I wouldn't say his babbling is 'tuneful' (only heard mamama, dadada and nanana (banana) - doesn't use any other consonants). He has a really short attention span and won't sit and read books or sing songs. Don't know what I can do to try and encourage speech to be honest when I can't get his attnetion

HeyJupiter · 18/11/2018 14:33

I’m sorry you’re worrying too @chelle.

Regarding the name response is there any chance you might be over testing? During anxious periods I would be calling my DS all the time to see if he would respond but I think he was tuning me out. I was advised to call no more than 10 times a day. Also do you call him lots of nicknames?

The important thing about eye contact is not the duration he gazes at you but rather whether he uses it to communicate- eg does he look you in the eye when crying for you? Or look at you when he is enjoying something and therefore sharing that experience with you? That’s called joint attention and an important milestone.

Pointing is the most important gesture when it comes to ruling out autism so that’s really promising!

I’m no expert but have picked up a lot of this info in my PNA state of mind!

BentleyBelly · 18/11/2018 15:14

My 13 month old doesn't say anything recognisable...he is more into learning to move and climb right now. His older sister was the opposite, sat on her bum playing with fiddly toys and chatting away but didn't walk till she was nearly 2. They all do everything in their own time, try not to worry.

lovemyprince · 18/11/2018 15:19

@BentleyBelly thank you he can take a couple of steps on his own and will use his first steps push among walker and walk with that he's not very confident doing it but he's doing it it's more the talking that's worrying is I can't help but worry he babbles away but doesn't say any words I've been told if the health visitor not to worry but just can't help it

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loveautum · 18/11/2018 19:51

@lovemyprince I was told that they tend to focus on one thing at a time, therefore you mentioned he's taking steps, so most likely his focus is walking at the moment.
My 14.5 month old is just starting to walk and babbling lots kind of saying "that" and pointing but that's about it (other than the mumma and dada ect)

I'm a bit of a worrier too, but actually trying not to worry too much now as I feel I don't want to look back and not enjoy these early years being clouded with what's she's not doing. I know some children are more advanced, but you will probably notice that your little one understands a lot more than you think, I've really seen a change again at 14 months.
The talking will come, worrying about it will not change anything it will just remove any enjoyment. Also try and focus on what they are doing and how well they are developing that's really helped me. My little girl only started clapping at 13 months and now we both have fun clapping together 😊

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