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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Still in a cot - unusual??

17 replies

Nic04 · 18/08/2004 06:59

Just wondering if anyone's kids are still in a cot around the age of 3 or 4... my ds has just turned 4 and he is still sleeping in a cot, mainly because of the fact that it's fairly roomy and he's never attempted to climb out. He sleeps very well in it, so it's just more the fact that we haven't bothered to change him over to a bed yet. We know that he's probably well past the age of being in a cot, but is it really that unusual for a child to stay in a cot for a few years?

Dh and I are looking around for a bed for ds now, so it won't be long before he's in one. But my SIL has been telling me for a LONG time that she doesn't approve of the fact that my ds is still in a cot - nevermind that he sleeps for at least 11 hours every night in it! (..and her 3 1/2 year old dd still has a bottle every night, but I've never made a comment about that) . My mother-in-law also gave me a funny look recently when I told her that we were looking around for a bed for ds, & she seemed a bit taken aback that we'd left it this long to get him one. I seem to get the feeling that people think you're doing the child some sort of injustice by not putting them into a bed at an early age, either that or they think you're being lazy. I just don't know... what does everyone think about this? Ds has genuinely been happy to stay in his cot, which is why we've left him there so long.

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bloss · 18/08/2004 07:07

Message withdrawn

tigermoth · 18/08/2004 07:10

As your ds has been happy in his cot, and sleeps so well there, no problem as far as I can see. He's well old enough to tell you if he hates this sleeping arrangement.

My sons were late moving into a bed as we had a fab and roomy cot bed. After it passsed from ds1 to ds2 it was a little the worse for wear. We couldn't get the cot bars down so they stayed up. The only reason ds2 moved out of the cot at around 3 years old was because he wanted to sleep in his older brother's room. He went straight from a cot to a top bunk! quite a big leap, but he took it in his stride, so having cot bars did not make him fearful of 'ordinary' beds.

tigermoth · 18/08/2004 07:15

oh I'd forgotten about the night training aspect. I remember hearing ds2 scale his cot bars and go to the bathroom at night, then climb back in bed once he'd been. However, he must have found it a hassle climbing back over the cot bars when he was sleepy so often came into our bed instead. Toilet training was one of the reasons we moved him out of the cot.

FairyMum · 18/08/2004 07:34

DS is nearly 3 and still happy in his cot, so with the new baby we now have 2 cots.He refused to give his cot up for the new baby.....

Fio2 · 18/08/2004 08:14

if he is happy I cant see whats wrong with it tbh

prettycandles · 18/08/2004 13:43

We only moved ds out of his cot about a month or so ago at 3y9m-ish. The only reason we moved him was that he is about 3cm shorter than the cot itself! Until then he wasn't interested at all in sleeping in a bed, he loved his cot. But after staying overnight a couple of times at my mum's, he became more open to the idea of moving to a bed. Like yours he never tried to climb out of the cot and slept very well in it.

It was also very convenient to keep him in a cot because ds and dd share a room, and they were both in cots.

Ds is now very happy with his bed and loves it just as much as he loved his cot. It took him several weeks to realise that he could get out during sleep-times if he chose!

There is absolutely no reason to hurry the move, especially if the child is contented in the cot. Ignore any silly comments from relatives !

suedonim · 18/08/2004 16:18

All of mine were at least 3-ish and two of them about 4 before they moved into a bed. None of them climbed out, in fact ds1 didn't even get out of his bed because he didn't understand that he could, lol!! I don't see the problem, if it suits everyone - tell people to keep their noses out of your business, thank you very much!!

webmum · 18/08/2004 16:30

we moved dd from the cot just after her third birthday, like yours she never tried to climb over and she was happy in it, but I'm expecting our second and did not want to leave it until the last moment.

I think most people move them because they have a second child and have no choice or because they try to climb out. I don't why it shouold be a problem and don't listen to silly people!!

Blu · 18/08/2004 16:38

AS far as I can see the only problem here is a SIL who should mind her own business and not attach judgement to things which are running perfectly smoothly and happily for all concerned. What is there not to 'approve of'? Don't let such silliness upset you!

honeybunny · 18/08/2004 16:46

I congratulate you. Wish my youngest was still in a cot, we might be getting more sleep! Only moved ds2 into his bed at 22months because he wanted to share a room with ds1 and that meant bunk beds. Wish, wish, wish we'd left it longer, but we'd just come back from a 2week hol where they'd shared and we'd had 14nights of uninterupted sleep and wondered if that was down to the reasurance that ds1 provided to ds2. Who knows? Expecting again now, and I swear she is staying in a cot until she's too big for it!!

JJ · 18/08/2004 21:57

This is so reassuring! We have a cot for my youngest (nearly 3) which turns into a toddler bed. I've just been too lazy to do it.

You guys have taken one thing off my worry list! Thanks.

elliott · 19/08/2004 09:39

Can I ask what people with older toddlers in cots do when you go away? Ds1 is 3 in November and I am dreading moving him from his cot as we have some big sleep problems with him, but otoh he's getting a bit big for a travel cot and can climb out of it (and we need it for ds2 now anyway). The main motivation for moving to a bed is so that he can sleep in a bed when we go away - I'm not sure that just sleeping in a bed away from home is going to work as we have huge difficulties settling him away from home at the moment anyway.

lena2 · 19/08/2004 09:54

Only concern I'd have is would he be teased by friends etc if htey knew he sleeps in a cot?

Earlybird · 19/08/2004 10:25

DD has a cot that makes into a small bed. She has been perfectly content/secure in her cot, and has never tried to climb out. For several weeks now, we've been talking about how the rails come off to make a "big girl bed". Yesterday she decided she was ready to make the transition, so we made a big project of fixing her "new" bed together. Before bedtime, she had lots of fun getting in and out of bed, lying down whenever she wanted, and just "lounging" about. We put pillows on the floor for when she rolled out (inevitable), and I told her not to be surprised when it happened.

This morning instead of the usual early morning wake up call of "muuuummmmmeeeeeee!", I was awakened by a little one walking sleepily into the lounge, blanket in hand. She proudly told me how well she did, and even related how she rolled out of the bed, but it was OK, because she simply climbed back in. Now that the rails are off, we've already started talking about how she can now get up in the night to go potty, so soon won't need a night time nappy.

I must confess that I took pictures of her standing in front of her cot before we took it apart, and again standing in front of her new bed. What a momentous day. My little one has negotiated another one of the major steps toward being independent and growing up. I feel proud, and a bit sentimental. Some might say that we made this transition a bit late as dd is 3.6, but I find that she adjusts to changes best when she feels ready, and not when I've pushed her.

enid · 19/08/2004 14:31

my friends dd is 4 and still in a cot. It looks so unbelievably cosy we can quite understand why she doesn't want a bed. It is completely filled with pillows and blankets and toys and looks like the most snug nest imaginable. Nothing wrong with it IMO.

IlanaK · 19/08/2004 19:19

We have only just moved ds out of his cot at 3 years old. It is a cot bed and we have made it into a toddler bed. He was perfectly happy in his cot and never climbed out and the only reason we did it was that we are travelling to see the inlaws in Australia and he is too big for a travel cot. He took to it fine and like another poster said he does not climb out of it in the morning. He calls out to us as if he can't get out himself.

nappyaddict · 27/06/2008 22:40

i have just come across this. if your 4 year olds are still in their cots how do they go to the toilet in the night?

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