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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

How do I get him to play with toys?!!?!?!?!?!?

16 replies

Flame · 31/05/2007 13:19

Instead of ripping all the sodding books off my bookcase?!!?!?

No doesn't work.

Distraction doesn't work (he doesn't want to be distracted, he wants my books).

Moving them isn't an option.

If its not the books its the dvds, if its not the dvds its climbing up furniture to the table to throw work off there... he has now worked out he can stand up during dinner and crawl across the bloody table if you can't grab him quick enough!!!

What age is it that you can actually get them to stop doing something by telling them not to??!?!!?

DD caught on much earlier than this.

I spend my life making him cry by taking him away from the "good" toys to give him cr*ppy building blocks etc. He only wants pots and pans when he's not meant to have them - GIVE them to him to play with and he looks disgusted and wanders off to the books.

I'm tired of it all and spend my time wanting sun (he goes out in the garden and plays safely and happily for ages), or for him to sleep. Its even worse at friend's houses because its not just my stuff he is wrecking

Help!!!

He's 15 months

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Original poster

Flame · 31/05/2007 13:42

He's currently sleeping.

There is a limit to how much time I can spend playing with him one to one. During term time he sleeps most mornings, and we spend 3 afternoons out doing something (afternoon group with DD, soft play with a friend etc) but I can't spend all day every day out, especially during school holidays.

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease help me....

OP posts:

Twiglett · 31/05/2007 13:43

every time he does it pick him up, say No firmly and move him somewhere else and grab his attention with something else

it takes time

Twiglett · 31/05/2007 13:44

he's 15 months flame

and I'm glad your DD does what you tell her .. mine doesn't and she's 3

hjscho · 31/05/2007 13:50

Give yourself a break. You dont need to play with him all the time. I gave in in the end and put everything out of the way so DS couldn't touch them. It made my life easier. He has only just started playing with his toys alone (he is 21 months)and I have always felt that I cannot get things done. After having DD recently I decided to make a box of 'things'for an emergency. I just collect loo rolls,yogurt pots and other 'rubbish' and put it all in a cardboard box. When I want to do somehting I let DS empty box and throw it all over the place. I have also put his toys into a cupbaord and he can empty it himself. He is reallygoodwith it and he tends to tidy it up more (all about ownership I suppose).

I'mnot sure children will ever listen when you say no,but it doeset easier. DVDs and CDs etc on shelves are always too apealing.

Oh yes...I have also given into letting him wash up when he wants and he helps me cook by having a pan on a ring and a spoon...maybe a bit dangerous in some people'seyes (my mother is one of them) but mycooker is wide and I watch him like a hawk.

Original poster

Flame · 31/05/2007 13:52

Think I'm just tired and hormonal

DD only does what she's told w/r taking books off shelves

OP posts:

uberalice · 31/05/2007 13:59

Flame, I've been there too. Have you tried rotating his toys? Put most of his toys away somewhere where he can't find them. Every couple of weeks, bring out some of the "new" toys and put the old ones away. Then, when you bring the new toys out, put them in a crate in the middle of the room, and let him discover them himself. I find it can buy me an hour or so of peace every so often.

Egg · 31/05/2007 14:01

Flame, I have a 15 month old DS who may have been separated from your DS at birth. He is FAB when outside in the garden / park, and great at play areas / softplay etc, but he does like to pull all the dvds down, throw anything that isn't tied down across the room to see if it bounces, and generally be a bit naughty... He never listens when I say no, and if I pick him up and move him away he goes back to the forbidden thing again and again. I have moved almost everything out of reach, but still find I am saying "no" every 5 mins.

He is lovely though, and does it all with a smile .

Original poster

Flame · 31/05/2007 14:03

Ah yes - the smile!

OP posts:

Egg · 31/05/2007 14:13

Does your DS wait until you are watching to do some of the naughty things, and then do them whilst grinning proudly?

Original poster

Flame · 31/05/2007 14:19

Nah, he does em whether I watch or not

OP posts:

Egg · 31/05/2007 14:22

Oh I did say some of the naughty things. My DS loves to pull all the clean washing off the drying racks, and to either pull rubbish out of the bin, or to put valuables into the bin, all of which he prefers to do when I am NOT watching. Then he stands proudly puffing his little chest out when I come back into the room. Bless him.

kels666 · 31/05/2007 14:30

um, my dd's 2.1 and has never played with toys. She climbs, bounces on furniture, opens cupboards, switches on kitchen appliances etc. The only time she wants a toy is when her 10 mth old brother is playing with it. She will read a book though....thank god

mm22bys · 31/05/2007 16:07

My DS is the same too, although he has turned 3 now so things are improving (slowly...)

He would get into everything, actually he is still does.

I got up yesterday morning to find him standing on top of the kitchen bench, naked, with the top shelf open, his baby brother's formula all over the bench and in a jug, with water added, and detergent added into the mix.

Bless him....

So sorry I am no position to tell you how you can change his behaviour, but I do know exactly how you feel, so you have my full commisserations!

Lovage · 07/06/2007 19:07

My LO (10 months) is a terror for books too, but we've found we can babyproof the bookshelves by packing the books really tightly. Not so good for the books and might not help with his frustration at not being able to reach them, but might be worth a try. DS doesn't seem to mind that he can't pull them out anymore, still likes to pat the spines and bang on the shelves.

Cascara · 07/06/2007 19:33

DS was exactly the same at that age. I actually let him take the books of because he's PFB (Precious First Born) and was Exploring and also because it kept him occupied! Anyway, I did eventually see reason and just started telling him he couldn't do that and moving him away, and doing it again, and doing it again. It eventually worked. I did let him play with the dvd's for ages because he couldn't destroy them and he was very much taken with anything with the picture of a blond female on it! He got really good at flicking each one out in quick succession down the dvd towers till eventually DH got tired of it and turned it round and put them in backwards, then he just poked them until they touched the wall!

At about 16 months he switched his attention to cars, obsessively! And such a relief.

As for them stopping when you tell them not to... Hahaha! ahem! Well ds is now 3 and he will stop doing things a lot of the time when I tell him but he almost always has to get one last go in!

Othersideofthechannel · 07/06/2007 20:18

Hang on in there. 15 month boy, he's definitely not far from the car fascination phase...

In the meantime, have you tried playing with his toys while he's watching so they go up in his estimation. Used to work wonders with DS. I used to put him down for a nap, half build something out of Megabloks or when he was older start a puzzle, and he would complete what I had started.

Toy rotation rules.

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