When do you teach boys to wee standing up?

[mollipops]

This has probably been covered before but I couldn't find it on a search...

Ds is 3y 4m and has been potty trained for about 3 months. He is very good with basically no accidents, day and night. But he still prefers the potty at home and at daycare, and will only use a toilet sitting if you hold him when we are out and the potty isn't an option (and only to wee). When do we start trying to teach him about weeing standing up? And is pooing on the toilet another tricky transition? I don't want to upset the apparent smoothness of things to date! Any advice or past experiences much appreciated!

I think it is difficult to teach boys to wee standing up when they see their mum as a role model. My boys were cared for by myself or other women in their first few years and rarely saw their dad go to the toilet so the idea of standing up just wasn't something that they thought about. I don't think there is a right age, but whenever they can reach over the toilet rim they can do a wee standing up - you could make a game by making a toilet paper island to aim for. As for doing a poo on the toilet, IME children are not keen to do this if they don't feel secure and comfortable so an adapter seat and step are probably required. It must be quite frightening for a little one to be perched over this big hole with water at the bottom.

I can't remember when DS1 and DS2 started using the toilet rather than the potty but they both started nursery at 3 1/2 so they must have been ok by then. I'm still trying to get DD onto a potty without much success and she's now 3y 2m, so I've still got to master the toilet with her.

Mollipops,

Start sending your ds to the loo with daddy, and sooner or later he will get the idea. My ds really got the hang of weeing standing up when we were out walking and he had to wee outdoors (try watering the plants!). The only problem we then had was persuading him not to whip it out and sprinkle every flower bed we passed when we were back in town .

I would leave the standing up to wee until he has mastered pooing in the toilet. Having 3 boys I know that they will eventually master standing at the toilet ( not always getting the aim right mind you - if you have carpet get rid of it!).

It can be confusing for them to master both techniques so better to get the poos sorted first IMO

By the way - are you encouraging ds to empty his wee out of the potty into the toilet? Then the association is made where it should go. There is a sticker book for successful use of the toilet which I can't remember the name of now. I found it helpful as hey get a badge each time they manage to go on the actual loo. I am sure someone out there knows it's title.

I found that my ds just decided one day to start standing up. I think it helps if they see other boys doing it, as ds told me the other boys at nursery did it.

DS was taught by peeing against a tree - he found that great.... he still prefers to sit but has no problem standing up if needed.

My eldest (just 5) prefers to sit down. I was a bit concerned about this, and gave him a sticker chart for 'wees standing up' - he loved it and did every wee standing up for a week, for his prize. But has now reverted back to his throne! I guess it's not a problem if he actually can do it, and can choose.

My youngest (3) has always done wees standing up at the toilet. Definitely some disadvantages too ... the inaccuracy, mess, and smelliness!

Can I ask why we want our boys to wee standing up? Are dh's not concerned or not noticing what's going on (?haven't got there myself but very curious).

My dh thinks that it can cause potential teasing at school if boys don't wee standing up, or if they can't do so proficiently.

He also points out that (apparently) actual toilets in men's public toilets (rather than urinals) are generally disgusting, so they need to be able to do it standing up!

My ds (3 yrs 5 mos)started to wee standing up recently because he saw a friend doing it. He's quite good at it but of course now you get sprinkles everywhere (just like daddy ...). That's the problem with men - no aim in life.

I never taught mine, he just decided to after watching his dad. Good point about the filthiness of the cubicles in mens' loos. BTW, anyone any advice on when I should start letting ds go in the mens on his own? (Never?) I usually take him in the ladies with me wherever we go (unless it's the park and I'm right outside, small loos or if dp/ex dh takes him) but he's getting more and more adverse to this (5 in October). What does/did everyone else do?

XAusted

Just give them something to aim for and most men get it right most of the time.

Just remember that hitting a small target from a distance can be difficult under adverse conditions.

Mollipops,

Our DS started to wee standing upright at about 3 1/2 when he was just about the right height to point it over!! Still often starts before he's fully ready though. We often go for long walks so he got used to the idea of watering the plants earlier than this! He is only now (4yrs 4 months)perching himself onto the proper toilet seat to poo as up until now he has used a training seat on top, but as he starts school full time later this month he is unlikely to be able to hold off until he gets home as we believe he has tried until now. It is very much a confidence issue now and just hope we can avoid accidents when he needs to go and is on his own.

Suggest you go at your ds' own pace as far as poss. but as others have said copying is the best incentive.

Liz

Message withdrawn

When my son discovered weeing standing up (only a couple of months after starting potty training) he became easier to train not harder, as he loved 'weeing like daddy'. Life is so much easier when we go out, so i recommend daddy teaching him ASAP!!

Like almost everyone else here, my ds suddenly decided to "wee like a man". we had a few problems at first with the floor getting drenched, but now he's got a little stool (10p from a boot sale - bargain!) so he can reach easily. he was insecure about pooing on the loo, so he had a trainer seat for a long while till he felt confident.

I also have the problem of him not wanting to come in the ladies with me when we're out - and as I'm a single parent, its very awkward when he runs ahead and disappears into the men's loos.

I was wondering about this too. I have two boys, one potty trained. He looks horrified at the idea of standing to it! This thread has helped me not to worry, he will sort it out in his own time. Thanks.

My ds watched my dh doing it standing up and instantly wanted to copy him. To help with the aim if you but a table tennis ball in the toilet it is a floating aim and doesn't flush.

I suppose either way - standing up or sitting down - is preferable to being on all fours and cocking his leg like a dog which is what I found DS doing today in the garden! Oh well, back to the drawing board!

(We don't even have a dog!)