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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

DD will not take the Dummy AT ALL!!

24 replies

TiredJani · 23/05/2007 06:29

Hi all. I know it's Mumsnet but I am a dad! We have a 5 week old and every night (sometimes every naptime) we see her rooting away and trying to suck anything that comes within 1mm of her little face. We have tried the dummy numerous times and she just howls and gets really cross and spits it out. She has taken the dummy on 2 occasions and it worked wonderfully for her but only on those 2 occasions. Does anyone have any tips/tricks for getting her to take a dummy? It would make life easier for her and us.

Thanks very much

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belgo · 23/05/2007 06:32

It shouldn't be that hard to get her to take a dummy. I would give up on the dummy!

When she is rooting, does she seem upset? Your post implies she only gets upset when you try and give her the dummy.

belgo · 23/05/2007 06:33

it may be a bit of a stupid question - but are you certain she's not hungry?

SittingBull · 23/05/2007 06:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

cathcart · 23/05/2007 06:59

Is she bf?
Mine was the same as this and if you are sure she is not hungry then i would say she is just wanting comfort. Mine would not take a dummy either and I kept thinking she was hungry so was bf for ages untill I realised she was just using me as a dummy!
I encouraged her to suck on my finger as the next best thing, she wasn't too keen but after a few weeks she found her own fist to suck on.
Give it a bit of time I'm sure it will get easier.

lulumama · 23/05/2007 07:22

newborns can be hungrier more than you can ever imagine, and can feed almost constantly ! breastfeed babies can seem to be on the breast all the time....some babies are very very sucky, and want to suck all the time...also, the rooting reflex does calm down...but at this stage it is more often than not hunger !

Tatat · 23/05/2007 13:16

Tap very gently on the end with your finger - for some reason this has worked with every baby I know.

nailpolish · 23/05/2007 13:20

my 2 babies did htis and i got an old tshirt that had had breast milk spilt on it and therefore smelled (smelt?) o fme and i gave them that as a comofrt

a bit mingin i know but it worked

i dont like dummies btw so didnt even offer one

americantrish · 23/05/2007 13:38

heh! welcome dads are very much welcome here too
my son wouldnt take a dummy after trying countless different ones.

Nemo2007 · 23/05/2007 13:39

Nope if she doesnt want it she wont take it. My Ds and DD2 both hated dummies!!

ghosty · 23/05/2007 13:42

IME babies will only take a dummy if they like sucking but are not hungry. My DD loved her dummy but ONLY when she wasn't hungry. If she was in the least bit peckish she would spit it out in disgust.
My DS, on the other hand, never did take to a dummy so not all babies like them.
Don't try and force her to have one ... otherwise you may end up like us and about to embark on the "Give the Dummy to the Dummy Fairy" game with a 3 year old.

terramum · 23/05/2007 13:43

Rooting is usually one of the first signs of hunger so I would personally offer milk when she does this. Its normal for babies to feed little & often at this early stage as they only have small tummies.

See this link for other hunger cues.

thelittlestboho · 23/05/2007 14:56

My dd3 was exactly the same, so unlike my other two dds, who took to it without a problem.As she was breastfed I became the soother, lol. It's so frustrating when you know that they're not hungry, just wanting a bit of sucky comfort and yet point blank refused it. We amassed 11 dummies, five different types and still nothing, ARGH!! She accepted it off my MIL a few times but not consistantly. THEN.... Amazingly last week at 12wks old she changed her mind and now happily sucks away, it's made such a difference to her sleeping during the day, but we only give it when she's obviously tired and never at night-time. So I hope this has given you a bit of hope, just keep trying every so often and you never know.

Flame · 23/05/2007 14:58

I know it sounds a lifetime away, but if you can struggle through to about 12 weeks if she wants to suck she will find her thumb/accept the dummy then.

ohsmellyjelly · 23/05/2007 14:59

Message withdrawn

LadyOfTheFlowers · 23/05/2007 15:01

congratulamations!
ds1 loved his dummy, ds2 absolutely hates them. if she doesnt want it, she doesnt want it im afraid! will save you heart ache in the future!
i would say she needs feeding, new babies feed 24/7 to begin with!
hang in there!

talcyoyo · 23/05/2007 15:02

My dds wouldn't
chucked it out
worked out fine in the end

good luck

ProfYaffle · 23/05/2007 15:03

My dd1 never took a dummy but started to suck her fingers around 10 or 11 weeks I think. Dd2 is 12 weeks and seems to be indifferent, will sometimes have one sometimes not. She seems to prefer a latex teat which has been warmed.

raspberryberet · 23/05/2007 15:04

Sounds like she needs feeding - "cluster" feeding in the evenings is really common, it means that babies need to feed ... and feed ... and feed. Dd used to feed for up to four hours at bedtime; it's hard, but it will get better.

Forget the dummy and try feeding her instead.

hellish · 23/05/2007 15:17

congratulations ! IMO if you have made it to 5 weeks without the dummy you're half way to not needing one.

My DD1 loved (really loved) her dummy..

I spent the first two years of her life running into her room at various points of the night and diving under the cot frantically searching for it in the dark when it had dropped out. (not a pretty sight). And then the next 2 years searching the house/car/park/shops/ cafes.. for the dummy when she had left it somewhere. Finally, aged 4 she swapped it for a barbie scooter, but TBH has never (age 7) found it easy to get to sleep since giving it up.

Consequently I was determined not to give dd2 a dummy, I just fed her whenever she rooted/ cried - and she was a much better sleeper and more contented all round.

I know it's hard in week 5 when you (or dw) seem to be constantly feeding, but remember, this is really the hardest part- soon it will start to get easier - she will sleep longer and go longer between feeds.

My dd1 had a lot of trouble getting up wind in first few months and a midwife told my that babies want to suck when they have wind, maybe spending longer winding might help??

Good luck.

kateyp · 23/05/2007 15:22

Same here I'm afraid - DS1 never took to one and DS2 seems to be the same - he sounds just like yours rooting away all the time - he really did just want to feed lots.

He is 10 weeks now and has almost found his thumb (he keeps getting his hand in there) and so I am hoping once he susses that that things will get a little easier.

Best of luck!

Elasticwoman · 23/05/2007 21:26

None of my 3 took a dummy so I just fed them more. You cannot overfeed a bf baby. Different matter with ff baby, but skin to skin contact is great for all babies. Can be mum or dad.

ghosty · 23/05/2007 23:04

Weeps silently at hellish's words - "but TBH has never (age 7) found it easy to get to sleep since giving it up." ... Really??

DD is such a good sleeper and loves going to bed (where her dummies are) ... the thought of getting rid of the dummies and having a second crap sleeper in the house fills me with dread

Original poster

TiredJani · 24/05/2007 06:01

Oh my goodness! I cannot thank you all enough for this valuable information.

My wife does feed her very often and she's fine most of the time. But when I put her down sometimes (bouncing her on the yoga ball) she keeps looking for something to suck. And when she finally goes to sleep we can see her on the baby monitor lying in her cot, awake, sucking air like a maniac. The little thing would just benefit so much from having the dummy!!! Oh well...time will tell I suppose. We will probably keep trying. Today she was diagnosed with possible reflux so we are onto that adventure now. We were going to start the Whisperer schedule and dream feed (more like scream feed at the moment..lol)

Again, thanks to all who answered and gave hope and advice.

OP posts:

ScottishThistle · 24/05/2007 06:05

Oh poor little thing, reflux isn't nice!

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