DD becoming a bit obsessive (22m) is this normal?

[lucyellensmum]

I have had concerns re my dd for a while and she was assessed by a peadiatrician at 18 months who said that she is defo not autistic as she interacts so well with people, once she overcomes some initial shyness. They did ask re obsessions and rigidity in routines but at the time she wasnt like this. Now she is becoming slightly obsessional and it wouldnt have concerned me if they had not raised it. For instance, it can only be mummy who gives her her bottle, even though she is a big time daddy's girl and a few other silly things lie a tantrum if i put her in her sleeping bag before her story at night time. Also the other day she was lining her bears up and is quite the one for putting things away, which is definately not like her mother - any thoughts?

The things you mention don't sound unusual to me - toddlers can be quite fussy and quite rigid, they like to have a little bit of control, so will often insist on things being done their way. My dd2 has always liked a certain cup, certain pyjamas, the same few books at the moment over and over, and dd1 has always been one for lining things up.

I think (hope) it's normal. My DS is 22months and is also getting quite obsessed with routines etc. This is particularly true towards the end of the day when he is tired. Has to have the same stories, and take the same cars to bed each night. Very picky about lining up toys (all facing the same way in a scarily neat line. He's also started getting very clean and tidy, needing to have hands wiped all the time etc, but I think this is simply all part of growing up, and a good sign that he will be ready to potty train one day in the not too distant future.

But he is incredibly sociable and happy and loves kissing and cuddling all and sundry. He also put his head on my lap the other day when I was having a little PMT related weep. I think you need to trust your paed and go with the routines/obsessions for now. I know nothing about autism however, so hope someone else with more experience will post for you.

This sounds normal to me. ds is coming out of this phase at age 2.5 but when he was younger certain things had to be done his way or there was truoble

It was things like what order buttons were pressed on a board book with noises on it, having to have matching spoon and fork, certain teddies had to be on his bed at night etc etc

I also found that the rules changed without notice, and then I would be left guessing what I had done wrong when he got upset. Oh what fun

thanks for that you have confirmed my feelings that this is OK, she does have speech delay and is having speech therapy but tbh there is no little girl fairer or sweeter than her, this morning she was poking her tongue out at me from the top of the slide and is very concerned if i am upset for any reason. Defo big on cuddles, oh, i just luuurve her soooo much.

That sounds very normal (have 3 children, 1 severely autistic- my liner upper was NT ds2). If you have concerns though never hesitate to go back for a 2nd opinion.

She sounds very sweet. Can i ask, why speech therapy at 22months - this seems so early. My dd spoke late - at 22 m she hardly said anything only a handful of words. When she turned 2 i was a bit worried as she hardly said anything. She's 27 months now, and never stops talking. She went from not saying much at all to complete sentences in a matter of weeks - probably at about 25months. Now she uses words like 'actually' and 'definitely' and has opinions and expertise in almost every field!

I think just because we were in the system early as she had words at about a year and lost them. She still doesnt say much but is trying more words now but is very unclear. She is getting there though, and she is certainly bright. No harm in the speech therapy though, have had one session and it was fun and informative, she just sees it as another toddler group.