Almost 4 year old still not playing with other kids

[Mummyoftwo28]

My almost 4 year old still really isn't playing WITH other kids but plays alongside.

For example today at a soft play birthday party she wasn't interested in playing with the other girls or running around like everyone and kept herself to herself. And generally can be like that.

I've noticed other kids her age actually playing together.

Should I be worried? When can I expect her to play with rather than alongside.

I wasn't a huge fan of kids growing up so I know what she may feel like, but still can't help worry about her social skills.

Is she at school yet OP or in childcare? It might be worth talking to her teacher or keyworker about your concerns and see if they’ve noticed and are doing anything to help her.

Do you have any other concerns at all?

My DS has autism and when he was 4 he didn't really play in a normal way with other children. He would often be very content to keep to himself - more focused on the toys or the playground equipment than than the other children.

He would show interest in the other children and regarded them as friends but he did not engage with them in the same way that they did with each other. My DS would join in initially - or when something very exciting was happening - but often he would drift off from the group. Because he didn't engage enough with the other children they tended not to notice him so much so he would be on the edge of the group.

In my DS's case his failure to engage was no due to shyness as he was fully confident and had no anxiety about engaging - but just lacked the standard amount of interest.

Did your daughter know the children at the party? Is she shy in any way?