AIBU to worry about my DS1

[amyddss]

Hi everyone. I'm new to this and have never posted before so any advice would be greatly appreciated & also this might be long lol..
My oldest Ds is just about to turn 2 in 2 weeks time. He is like my little best friend and I don't know what I'd do without him. He is a happy, lovely boy but I do see some things that sometimes make me think "is that right?"
I'm 24 with 2 kids under 2 so I'm not sure if this is just because I'm a worrier or if I should be genuinely concerned. My youngest seems to be reaching all his milestones so far and is very active and on the go more so than my oldest was. Keeping in mind he's about to turn 2 I'm not sure if I should give him more time.
He's talking but he only says hiya, daddy, duggee (a programme he loves lol) he's trying to say something else I can't seem to make out, he can say the colour green, tries to say yellow & that's about it. He gets very frustrated and hits himself which is so upsetting. He has only very recently started to notice his little brother aswell, before this he would just walk by him and act like he didn't exist. He has his own little way of doing things where he needs to play with things a certain way, do certain things with his toys & then he has a terrible habit of throwing constantly. He doesn't seem to listen when he's told no but he certainly understands what it means. He mumbles to himself and moves his arms about wildly while he's in a world of his own and it's as if he understands what he's saying but it's coming out gibberish. A few months ago he started hitting when getting frustrated and I do believe it has a lot to do with him wanting to speak but not being able to get the words out. He seems to cover his ears quite a lot aswell as if he can hear something or something is bothering him that me and dh can't hear. He's honestly the loveliest little boy ever and I'm so proud to be his mummy, but I can't help but think maybe I'm not just worrying and he perhaps is slightly autistic? I have no idea how long I should give him because I know some health visitors have told me they won't do speech therapy and stuff until he's 27 months. I tried to raise the point agin with a hv and doctor and felt as if I was just fobbed off. I spend all my time with my kids and told the hv that I do feel as if he needs a bit of help but nobody seems to be willing to hear me out. Any suggestions or advice would be great.

Ask your GP for a hearing test for him. That's the first place to begin. You're not being silly to worry...the problem with children this age is that some very normal toddler behaviour is very similar to some of the signs of Autism.

That's why it can be tricky to diagnose young...but that doesnt mean it CAN'T be diagnosed.

See your GP...explain your worries...ask for a different one than last time. When you've had his hearing done, ask to see a developmental paediatrician. They can help...if they fob....INSIST. Politely of course...but get a bit pushy.

Thanks so much for your reply. It's difficult because he is still so young but I can't help but think there might be something more to it and drive myself nuts. I think I'll need to insist next visit from hv that he gets seen to and I'll definitely take him for a hearing test. He has passed his last hearing test but it was a while ago so don't think another one will hurt.

Try the MCHAT too. Here..

www.autismspeaks.org/what-autism/diagnosis/mchat

That's the second one I've done now and they have both said the same thing, I think I'll put on an appointment at the doctor instead of waiting for next hv appointment. Thanks so much!

It's worth having a look into whether you can self-refer to Speech and Language Therapy. Some areas have drop-in clinics; in my area you can complete an online questionnaire that goes directly to the SALT department. Have a dig around your local NHS website.

Yeah I think that's a good idea. He just seems in a world of his own sometimes and when I look at him I could cry lol! Will definitely have a look into that and thanks very much. Any advice is really appreciated.

It's hard when you start having worries but getting him checked out really is for the best. If it's nothing, then great, if it's "something" it's great to have an early jump on it. Waiting lists can be long and you always have the option of cancelling should you feel he no longer needs to be seen.

With DS3 we self-referred and the SALT then referred us on to other services, so it can also be a way to bypass the HV etc.

That's probably for the best. Some hv have been great but the last one I had was very much in the mind of "you can't diagnose things this early." That's understandable because it could just be his age but I think I've given him enough time now that it's clear maybe he needs a little bit of help in some places. Doesn't hurt to ask. His little brother has just turned 1 & is almost on his feet but I think he'd come on a lot more if he had some kids his age to play with as me & DH don't have family with kids so getting him into nursery is something I really need to do too.