How good can speech be in autistic children? Im doubting she has autism

[Spoppit]

Helloo

My daughter is 2 and a half years old she's under the child development team, waiting for speech and language therapy and we have portage doing risk assessment on her next week.

I have autistic family members on all different points of the spectrum, so I have some understanding of differences in character and traits.

My daughter has been pretty much the same from birth as she is now sleeps far more than expected, doesnt really eat and screams a lot ...
She's had a temper with inconsolable screaming fits from just under a year old.
At around 18 months I noticed a change in her eyes, i know it sounds weird but I felt as if she had gotten lost, she has a glazed expression in her eyes and when she looks at you she doesn't connect, she sort of looks through people or at a part of them (hair, mouth).
Everything else in her development i thought was normal until 2 years.

One of the main reasons shes under assessment is concerns around speech , she repeats a lot of phrases back and uses exact phrases she's heard to converse.

Over the past week or so she has been talking a lot better, she's adding mummy before things she wants to tell me (although she calls every woman mummy). I feel as if she's started talking too good, she is still repeating a lot and a lot of what she says is tv, books or things i say a lot but she's doing better in putting it into context.

So im stuck she seems to be doing so much better communicating with me, so is there any need to put her through all of this.
I don't want to make her go through it all for nothing but i don't want to not go through with it all and her end up having a disorder and feeling guilty in the future. :(

I haven’t got much experience but my DF’s eldest has Aspergers and his speech has always been very advanced so I wouldn’t rule it out. Also, try not to look st it as “putting her through things”. Both of mine have had speech therapy and were sad when the sessions finished as they were fun. I’m sure the assessments will be fine and you’ll hopefully get some support for her.

I think im worried well be laughed off because she's verbal, she still can't make a decision. If i ask what she wants to do I will get no response, if i give options she will repeat the one she wants back at me but most of the time when she has it she will say "nooo" doing a sort of laughing cry noise and say the same word and thank you.

I think an example is needed to explain.

"What do you want for breakfast? .... toast?"
No
"Cereal?"
No cereal
"Granola?"
Granola!
~give her Granola she pushes granola away~
Thank you granola thank you thank you

And will proceed to follow me screaming until i figure out something random like she wants yoghurt not milk

That does sound challenging, for both of you. Do you think pictures would help? So if you make pictures of what she likes for breakfast and offer her two pictures and see if she can decide?

I don’t think you’ll be laughed at because she’s verbal. Have you done the M-Chat to see how she scores?

That might be an idea thank you
Pointing and saying the word doesn't seem to help at the minute, she can point but it's definitely not at the thing she wants, we break stuff down a lot into colours if we do that she can say like "want one red".

I've taken it a few times as shes constantly changing , the lowest score she had is 11 which apparently is high risk still.
It's hard to say with some questions though like she enjoys watching children play but never engages in play with other children, she plays along side them but if they do something that doesn't benefit her game she loses it.

I have to read the same book, say the same thing every night,she has to have a bundle of clothes and a bottle to get her to sleep, if one thing is missing she can scream for hours, she's just woken up nattering then crying because i moved a few of the clothes whilst she was asleep, as soon as I put them back she went back to sleep. 😪

Other than offering sympathy, I feel really ill equipped having not had any experience. There is however a lovely Special Needs section on MN where some experienced MNers hang out. It might be worth posting in there

I can relate to you although mine was non verbal until 3 and then complex sentences spewed from his mouth overnight.
But he would scream and scream because he couldn't communicate what he wanted (he is diagnosed ASD).

Isn't what she's doing called Echolalia? It's fairly normal in children with ASD I believe.

Oh is there? Thank you I just dont look well enough 😂 oops thanks

It's hard seeing them distressed not being able to just tell you, the frustration in her face makes me cry.. but me crying makes her laugh 😂.
Was your son verbal before diagnosis?
My nephew was diagnosed at 3 but didn't make a peep apart from screams.
I've heard that quite a lot recently delayed and immediate echolalia, i think it is still just copying at the minute she has many accents too .
I feel like she could have just had a good couple of days because today is not at all easy to get through.

My DD has no problems with speech development at all. Diagnosed with ASD at age of 8, would have been Aspergers a few years back but all under ASD diagnosis.

I have 2 with a dx of ASD. By the time they had their assessments their vocabulary range was within the expected range and their difficulties were quite subtle in presentation (they spared the meltdowns for home!)

But their ability to understand (receptive language) and communicate needs/wants wasn't. (along with other things). Both of mine thoroughly enjoyed their assessments and DS3 still asks about when he be seeing his "talking ladies" next. It was a year ago!

Regardless of whether there is an underlying disorder or it's a delay that resolves, it's really great your DD is making progress and that you support her so well.

We initially had suspected selective mutism - she spoke to close friends and family only. At school she initially only spoke to a few adults and many children didn't know she spoke. Her speech was initially classed as delayed but she just wouldn't speak to anyone she didn't know. She was eventually tested and found to have an extremely advanced vocabulary.

She takes ages to answer and speaks very quietly. Her sentences are complex.

She also speaks in a few very silly, extremely irritating baby voices or will use hand gestures to communicate.

Sorry for not replying sooner I've been busy panicking and faffing lol

We saw the paediatrician the other day as DD appointment was brought forward.
Dr basically said DD has many strengths in her talking like knowing what things are - cup, ball, pen ... But as a lot of what she says in an attempted conversation is copied it is still a concern.

DD is now "on asd pathway" and looking at January for hearing anything more.
She had her assessment from portage and I believe should be starting working with them in September time.

Thanks for the responses