My childs development and am i expecting too much, too soon?

[Treehouse413]

My DD was born 3 weeks early and due to lack of oxygen and blood at birth she spent a week in intensive care. It was a horrible time and the MRI came back with some minor things (I don’t really understand as not a medic) but to cut a long story short they say there may be issues further down the line with tone or movement and maybe learning difficulties and concentration.

Thing is my only sibling, my sister, has Autism and it was hard growing up and i saw how my parents struggled. I am now constantly worried about everything and my babies’ development.

She is currently 8 weeks old and her tone and movement seem fine to me but she hasn’t smiled yet and she sometimes seems to look through us or just gaze around. Is this normal?

I have had very limited interation with babies and children so I have no idea what to look for and at what age? I have googled things but I can’t help worry!

Also, I am not sure how to entertain her when she is awake. She doesn’t seem interested in toys yet so I just sing or talk to her.

Any advice is greatly appreciated.

Thanks x

Interaction that should say...

Hey @Treehouse413. Congrats and hugs on your LO, sounds like it was a really tough time.

At this age, the best way to entertain your baby is to do what you are doing! Sing, talk, stroke and cuddle her close. A play gym is also nice for her to look at, and she will enjoy different fabrics on her skin, if you have any scarves etc.

In terms of development, I can't comment on the medical side but please try not to worry. Babies smile at all different times! My LO took a while because she has silent t reflux so didn't have much to smile about. Keep doing what you are doing and you will get that beautiful grin soon.

Stay away from Google! I know that's easier said than done! I spent many a sleep deprived night googling every noise/facial expression/sniff. Just try and enjoy her being so tiny! If you have any concerns, speak to your HV or GP, it's what they are there for. X

Thank you so much :) x

Hi, the only piece of advice I can offer is to remember that since your little one was born 3 weeks early then try to adjust her age to that, so whatever a 5 week old should be doing now that may be more along the lines of your 8 week old, it wouldn’t be fair to compare her to other children her age in some aspects I suppose.
I’m sorry to hear about the horrible and stressful time you all went through after her birth, I think singing and talking to her is great and they say that showing your baby black and white images at this stage is great for them and you can get a lot of black and white books specifically for very young babies!

The best thing for your baby's brain development is eye contact. Sing and talk to her while making eye contact. Has she had her 6 - 10 week development check yet? The doctor will ask about social smiling so if you let them know then she's not doing it yet they will be able to keep an eye on her. x