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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Help my 5.5month old has trouble going to slee[

24 replies

KaybeeandZak · 16/05/2007 11:58

I am having heaps of trouble getting my 5.5 month old ds to go to sleep. As soon as we get into his room he starts crying. The only way I can get him to sleep without full on crying is in the pushchair or car. It doesn't matter if I try to put him down at the very first sign of tiredness, he still screams and screams. In the end I have to either pick him up and rock and pat him, or sit by the cot stroking his forehead, or holding his arms still ( they wave around madly!!) This is all very well but it can take me 40mins to get him to sleep and then he only sleeps for half an hour which seems ridiculous.
Once he is asleep at night he does go through from 7 until about 6am which is great, it's just the getting to sleep part that is a worry. I can't hold him in my arms all day as I do need to get things done like get his bottles ready and do the housework etc!!

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hunkermunker · 16/05/2007 11:59

Do you have a sling?

Original poster

KaybeeandZak · 16/05/2007 12:09

No I have a babybjorn but he's too heavy to carry about all the time while I do stuff...

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hunkermunker · 16/05/2007 13:07

Try a ring or pouch sling - I still carry my nearly-16mo in mine a fair bit and he's probably about 25lbs now. They're MUCH easier to use than a BabyBjorn.

Original poster

KaybeeandZak · 16/05/2007 17:42

A sling is a nice idea, but it doesnt really help the underlying problem which is that he can't get to sleep without a huge fuss (on me or not). I have tried today to give him a cuddle and let him fall asleep on me but he still screams and screams and goes mental until he evenually drops off, but there's no real improvement..........

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Original poster

KaybeeandZak · 16/05/2007 17:42

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cruisemum1 · 16/05/2007 20:07

sounds overtired. Ar eyou catching him once he is wired or just tired? Maybe try the sleep/nap thing 10-15mins earlier than you currently do. It may help...

cruisemum1 · 16/05/2007 20:08

and things are tough....

Original poster

KaybeeandZak · 16/05/2007 21:47

i'm trying to catch him as soon as he shows any sign of being sleepy, but with him there seems to be no inbetween state!

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emwad · 16/05/2007 21:53

Has he got something that he associates with sleep like a cuddle teddy or blanket? My DS (nearly 5.5mths) wont go to sleep without his, he is really cranky if I forget it, then as soon as he has it he rubs it on his eyes and cheek until he falls alseep.
Just a thought but you never know, it might help.

yomellamoHelly · 16/05/2007 22:19

Have you tried swsaddling him or putting him in a gro-bag? Does tucking him in tightly work? Do you put him in his cot to play for a minute or so during his awsake times?

cruisemum1 · 17/05/2007 08:01

emwad - aaaaawwww - cute!

Original poster

KaybeeandZak · 17/05/2007 08:49

he is in a growbag, and in the past he was swaddled but i heard you aren't supposed to swaddle them after about 4 months?
He also has a cuddly blanket, which he does grab and wave around and eventually rubs over his face but there is usually a huge performance first!! And yeah I do put him in his cot to have a little play if I am putting his clothes away etc....

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lummox · 17/05/2007 08:51

i don't know why you're not supposed to swaddle after four months.

i tried to stop swaddling ds2 (4.5 months) and he just started to go spare every time i put him down to sleep.

so i started swaddling him again and he is a much, much happier bunny.

so unless there is a seriously compelling reason to stop i'm carrying on.

Original poster

KaybeeandZak · 18/05/2007 17:22

I'm not sure where I heard that you should stop at 3 months, but I carried on until about 4.5 months but then put him in a growbag. It was fine at first but lately he has started going mad at ALL nap times!!

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bizziebee · 18/05/2007 17:33

Could it be that he needs less sleep? if he is sleeping from 7pm to 6pm every night, he may not need as many naps? Just a thought.

bizziebee · 18/05/2007 17:36

7pm to 6am I mean!!!!!!!! whoops

Amberjee · 18/05/2007 17:55

its tough when they can't go to sleep isn't it. though, its really wonderful that your LO is sleeping so well at night. i guess all i can suggest (you've probably tried most things already)

have a consistent bedtime routine. our LO responds quite well to that and can often put himself to sleep after it.
wear him down to sleep in a sling. i agree the baby bjorn is tough but there are some more comfortable slings around
feed him into a relaxed state and put him down (though it seems like he might need to be totally asleep before you put him down)

i used to carry my LO for naps every day, it was tiring but the only way to get him to sleep. i used to also go on marathon pram walks once he started to sleep in the pram. now he does nap in his cot and its harder to go out all the time. so, both have their upsides and downsides. i wish you luck xx

Amberjee · 18/05/2007 17:57

one other thing, i started to even anticipate tiredness, before the tired signs even happened, like just guessing when i thought he would be tired - looking at the clock would help a lot, my LO tends to get tired after 2 hours of being awake. sometimes i got it wrong, but when it was right, he would put himself to sleep so easily for naps. i still mess up a lot of the time. there's a lot of getting back up in our house and trying in another half an hour!

Lady2Lane · 19/05/2007 22:50

Hi
I'm having similar problems with my 4 month old DD. She fusses at nap time during the day, but after a bit of persuasion, shhing and holding her flapping arms down she falls asleep quite quickly. Bedtime, however, is a different story. It starts at 6pm when she breastfeeds for about 30mins then I bath her and by 7pm she goes down for bedtime, but she doesn't fall asleep as usual and starts crying. I can keep doing this for an hour and she won't sleep. It is obvious she wants attention cos as soon as I pick her up and take her down stairs she stops crying. So when I go to put her down again and she starts again. By 9, I've lost all patience and she's screaming and overtired, and no doubt she's hungry now so I feed her and by 10.30pm she's fallen asleep. This, I know, isn't right and my whole evening is taken up with her needs so I end up eating late etc etc. 4.5hrs getting her to bed is ridiculous!
I'm wondering whether my situation (and possibly yours) could be a feeding issue and not a sleep issue.I'm going to try a different tact tomorrow: breastfeed her earlier (say 5pm) Bath at usual time and then at 7pm give her her last feed of the evening but increase the amount. I've noticed she has been guzzling her 150mls dream feed (usually given at 11pm), so I'm going to try giving her 210mls of formula at 7pm and no dream feed. She may not go through til 7am like she usually does, but you never know, with luck she just might! I'll let you know how I get on.
I bought The Baby Whisperer book and found it useful. Not all the methods work for me but since every baby is different they may help you. Good luck.

Amberjee · 20/05/2007 09:23

Lady - i breastfeed my 4 month old before and after his bath. so around 6pm a feed, then 7pm another feed. he usually takes a far bit at both, stocking up i like to think. he usually goes to bed easily unless really overtired, then we have to rock him to sleep. if he is in a good mood he settles himself. but i really think the breastfeeding before bed relaxes him (the milk + the comfort).
also it may be worth looking at naps. i know if LO has been awake too long before bedtime then he has a major crying breakdown and is sooo difficult to settle. if the afternoon nap is timed well, then all goes smoothly.
xx

Amberjee · 20/05/2007 09:24

oh. ps. my LO is a horrible sleeper, so take my advice with a grain of salt! but then because he's a horrible sleeper, i have tried a thing or two around sleep.

Lady2Lane · 20/05/2007 12:28

Hi Amberjee
Sounds like good advice. What time did you make the last nap before bed? And what time did your 4mth old go to bed?

Amberjee · 20/05/2007 19:43

the ideal is if he goes for a nap from 3 to 4.30 or so and goes to bed at 7.15 to be asleep at 7.30. now this is the 'ideal', of course you can't force it. but if we can get even close to this, things seem to go more smoothly. i start his bath routine around 6.30ish.

Original poster

KaybeeandZak · 23/05/2007 19:44

It all sounds like good advice
Things just seem to be going more and more downhill for us sleepwise, each night it takes him longer to get to sleep and then in the day he's so overtired it all just gets worse and worse!!! Grrr

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