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Behaviour/development

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Issues with my 9 year old boy

6 replies

Pigeonpost · 05/03/2018 10:07

I'm after some advice about my 9 year old please (he's 10 in Sept). He's always been a lovely boy, bit prone to dramatic responses but no major issues. He's the oldest of 3 boys, other two are both school age. Recently he's started to become very frustrated and angry. He gets very tearful over simple things (like being asked to put his shoes/coat both on for school) and has started to lash out at his brothers. So he'll walk past in a strop because he's been asked to pick up something he's left on the floor and then hit one of them for no apparent reason. And when we tell him off he gets hysterical and starts screaming and crying about how everyone is so mean to him all the time.

It's really difficult and I just don't know how to handle him anymore. I don't know if it's a hormonal thing or a developmental thing but if anyone can refer me to any advice to help me understand what might be causing this behaviour and how to handle it.

He is on long term Movicol for bowel issues which I think might have affected his behaviour (not the medicine itself) and recently has been complaining of various aches and pains. Last week it was headaches, this week its shoulder pain and bizarrely itchy feet. I suspect it's all linked though.

Any advice gratefully received.

OP posts:
EveryoneTalkAboutPopMusic · 05/03/2018 19:09

My DS’s behaviour went a bit out of shape at 9 but this seems like there is something more. Have you ever found out why he has constipation?

Pigeonpost · 05/03/2018 23:21

Not really but I think it was to do with the classic not wanting to poo at school. He doesn't even have constipation anymore but still talks about "urges" (which is when he used to poo himself with leakage) so relies on the Movicol as a bit of a crutch. He probably only has one dose a day if that now so very little really. Just worried that with his itchy feet and achey shoulders he seems to be getting a bit medicine dependent although presentation of symptoms does directly correlate with mood hence my suspicion that they are psychosomatic.

OP posts:
Donhill · 06/03/2018 04:56

My ds always gets more tearful at home when things are difficult at school. And he seems to take it out on his brother. With him, it seemed friendship issues became much more multi layered at that age. Before that my ds and his friends would have fairly simple arguments about who cheated at what, who wasn’t playing by the rules etc which might annoy him at the time but were over quickly. But from about 9 onwards it just got much more complicated and lots of social pressure between friends and subtler upsets. Could your ds be having a more difficult time at school?

Pigeonpost · 06/03/2018 20:26

He actually seems really happy to and from school but I'll have a word with his teacher. He's just very emotional. I had a chat with a friend who has older boys yesterday and she says it's entirely par for the course and probably hormone related. Urgh

OP posts:
897654321abcvrufhfgg · 07/03/2018 17:02

Am having same problem with my 8 yr old ( nearly 9) Just come home 1/2 hr ago and because of computer ban this evening ( because of yesterday’s horrific behaviour; kicked me in the face) he has thrown 3 boxes of Lego all over the playroom, screamed no at every warning I gave him and then wedged himself in a tiny corner whilst screaming at me. In the end I have pulled him out as he was not safe and he has flung himself into his room. At school he is a different child ( I get pulled to one side to b told just how well behaved he is regularly) I am sat here crying as he is making our household so negative st the moment and his little brother now hides from him as is scared of his behaviour.

897654321abcvrufhfgg · 07/03/2018 17:04

Must add that he has always struggled socially ( no best friend etc) but was always my easiest child out of the 5 I have

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