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Normal or not?

7 replies

marshminkmellow · 29/01/2018 18:03

Is his behaviour normal?

Our youngest son, 2 in March, seems to be the spawn of Satan and I'm worried his behaviour isn't normal.
He goes out of his way to do anything destructive or messy. If it's powder or cream, washing up liquid, or his favourite, cat biscuits and water. These items are not normally within reach and the poor cats have to run an obstacle course to get to their food, but every chance he has he destroys things. Rips up books, pulls labels of things, he delights in smearing food everywhere and deliberately spills food all over the food every meal. He's now learned he can spit out his juice every time he drinks. I'm actually worried he will become dehydrated because more juice goes out than in!.
He climbs everything, and I mean everything! I'm constantly removing him from the top of the changing unit, and I've made every effort to make it impossible to do so, but he goes finds things he can stand on to reach places he's not allowed. Every cupboard has to be locked or jammed shut. The front door has to be locked and key removed, because he bolts the second he gets the chance.
He doesn't have the best speech, but he is perfectly capable of understanding, yet he does not flinch when I explode (I've tried the calm practical approach, we've gone way past that... And I'm worried he will really hurt himself one day). He does not stop what he's doing when told, he point blank ignores me when I say stop, and defies every chance he gets.
What on earth do I do? Is this normal? Anyone else have a feral child? ConfusedWine

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Youvegotafriendinme · 31/01/2018 08:59

My Dn 2, is exactly the same. My DSIS can’t contain him. Every single cupboard and drawers have magnetic locks on them. Front and back door locked with the keys and any entry/exit routes are blocked off with high baby gates. She can’t take her eyes off him. My poor parents house is like a fortress for when he comes and he isn’t allowed to my house. He also hits, bites and scratches everyone. My DN is always covered in marks. We had a wedding Saturday and he just went round hitting everyone. I feel sorry for her but also for him. It’s like he’s never happy. I’m sorry I don’t have any advice for you but I didn’t want to read and run. Maybe contact a heath visitor for advice?

AmberTopaz · 31/01/2018 14:42

He sounds to me at the extreme end of normal for a nearly 2yo. Does he get lots of active or outdoor play? At this age, getting him outside a lot and close supervision at home will probably work better than trying to stop him via discipline techniques (naughty step etc). I know that’s hard on you though.

TippetyTapWriter · 31/01/2018 15:32

Sounds about normal to me. My ds (now 2.5) is the same (not violent or aggressive but very very active and full on). Some toddlers are calmer, others are like ours! The best tactic for us is to be out of the house as much as possible. He never runs out of energy but at least he can't destroy the park...

marshminkmellow · 01/02/2018 08:07

Thanks for your replies guys!
Unfortunately we don't get out much because we have yet to find a safe space for him to run around. Our local parks have swing gates and he's learned how to open them and run into the car park. One of them even has a pond! He seems to gravitate towards danger and he's too quick for me!
If we go anywhere, he has to be firmly strapped inside the buggy, which has extra belts because he can get his arms out and delights in dragging his head along the floor.
We've already been to hospital several times, dislocated arm, huge bruise on his head when he fell down a metal slide.... The looks they give you when you go in again and again. :(
I guess I just don't have the patience any more, our first born is the calm one. Sits where you put him, eats what you give him. The naughty toddlerish behaviour was mellowed out, you have the time and energy when there's one!

OP posts:
AmberTopaz · 01/02/2018 12:33

How about indoor soft play? A good one should be designed to prevent that kind of thing. Usually you can get an annual pass which makes it cheap per visit (if you go often).

AmberTopaz · 01/02/2018 12:34

OP I also had a calm DC1 and DC2 and then a nutter for DC3!

CheapSausagesAndSpam · 03/02/2018 04:06

Put him in an empty bath with a load of safe paints and some big brushes. Put him on a plastic mat with lots of different things to play with which are tactile....try to offer him the chance for messy play but in a controlled situation.

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