DD2 hitting out, big style

[misdee]

she is 4 years old. Last night she headbutted her two year old sister whilst 2yr old was in the cot, cue tears. she has headbutted me, her dad, other sister, wall etc. today she punched dd1 hard in the back at the school gates as dd1 did kiss dd2 'properly'. she did it so hard she made herself cry as her hand hurt. she gets told off, time out if possible (not always possible) and told not to do it again. help!

she does have some speech and behaviour issues, but the hitting is getting worse.

I believe in the 'attention to the victim' school of thought. I think you're already doing the right things, telling her it's wrong, not to do it again, and time on her own as a result. I'd do those things in the calmest, quickest way possible then pay very obviously better quality and longer attention to the victim.

Other than this I really don't think there's a magic wand, it is a case of knowing you're doing all you can and trusting her that she will get a handle on this as soon as she possibly can, with your consistent and loving guidance and boundaries.

My daughter has had behaviour probs she is 5 she now has a portage worker at school who has performed miracles with her. She was really bad last year she was hitting out at the other kids pulling their hair she even hot one of the welfare staff. I had trouble with the parents as well some peaple are just so narrow minded. I think that it,s a developmental thing & communication difficulties, please hang in there things will get better.