Worried about 15 month old Son's development

[Littlemiss82]

Hi everyone,

I just have a few questions really and would value your thoughts and opinions, my HV is due to come out but not until the end of January. I'm a first time Mum who suffers from anxiety which has been made worse since the birth of my DS. My Son was born at 37 weeks and is due to turn 15 months next week, he is a big guy on the 95th percentile for both height and weight. I have concerns over the following things and any help would be great:

1. DS is not walking independently yet, has been pulling up since 8 months and cruising since 9 months. He crawls up the stairs. He walks great holding onto one finger but as soon as he lets go he just drops to floor and crawls (bum shuffles). Is this something to be worried about?
2. DS is not talking yet, sometimes we get the odd Mumum and Da dee but other than that there's just lots of babbling and squeals, grunts etc. Would this be classed as a delay? I'm so worried that he will never speak.
3. He started pointing to show last week but is using his whole hand, is this ok? and more to point if we ask where something is, does whole hand pointing precede index pointing.

4, He points using his index finger when looking at books and can point to lots of different pictures in books and knows items we are talking about.

1. Today he has starting picking up a brush and tries to brush my hair with it, is this normal or should he be trying to brush his own hair?
2. DS waves hi and bye bye but mainly if someone has waved at him first. He has only clapped properly once the rest of the time he claps one hand on the back of the other. He does bang two objects together.

I really just would like to know if you think this is normal behaviours or should I ask HV for a referral? I'm losing lots of sleep over this. He's a very smiley, happy, social baby.

So should my DS be pointing for things like food and toys? Is this something you teach or something that comes with time?

Also should I be concerned about the clapping? He either hits the back of one hand with the other or he sees me trying to teach him to clap and just grabs my hands and claps them together, I think I worry if that's a form of hand leading or whether he just likes seeing me clap

Everyone
Choc

At this stage, I’d try not to worry. The M-Chat looks very useful, but you can’t do that for a while. For now, just try to enjoy your lovely boy

he shouldn't necessarily point at something he wants but at 15 months I would sone expect communication. if there is a toy or high on a shelve/table which he wants, but cannot reach. would he be able to communicate that he wants this?

That was my point. DD would not use pointing, words or anything but just cry. yet she was able to point in book at the correct objects when asked. but this isn't communication.

I think they expect pointing by latest 18 months so you still have some time.

but you are clearly worried. so follow it up and see HV or GP. even if only to put your mind to rest.

My son scored very low on his 1 year check, yet was totally normal, happy and healthy, he didn't walk until around 17 months. Your son sounds like he's hitting a lot of milestones and developing into a lovely little boy! He is showing a lot of understanding and doing a lot of physical things as well, which is brilliant.

The cognitive understanding it takes for him to know that a brush is to brush hair and then translate that to brushing your hair is a lot for a little one if you think about it :-)

And pointing to things in books etc, brilliant! I totally get why you are worried and even though it was my 2nd child who scored low on the 1 year check I still did worry, we are parents of course we're going to worry! I worried that he wasn't walking or talking as early as the guidelines say he should too. But he's just turned 2 and now I have no concerns at all.

I know of children who didn't walk/talk until they were 2, but could do plenty of other things like your son can. There has to be guidelines and the health visitors have to do these tests as sometimes they can flag things up but the tests are very rigid in what they say and my health visitor always said try to think outside the box with the examples, so on mine it said 'do they have a favourite teddy that they cuddle' which my son didn't, so she asked if he cuddled me and said that was fine, it's just a question of building attachments!

Hi 34weeksand counting: thanks for your reply, some days I feel ok then other I just have this overwhelming anxiety about it all. I'm not sure if I expect too much sometimes. It's more the little things like clapping and such I just can't understand why he doesn't do it, he's only clapped properly once and most of the time he grabs my hands and claps my hands together and he'll point to my nose and head etc but he refuses to point to his own nose and I just don't know if there is something in that or whether it's just he doesn't know he has these as he can't really see his own nose etc IFSWIM xx

Today 18:33 Littlemiss82

Hi 34weeksand counting: thanks for your reply, some days I feel ok then other I just have this overwhelming anxiety about it all. I'm not sure if I expect too much sometimes. It's more the little things like clapping and such I just can't understand why he doesn't do it, he's only clapped properly once and most of the time he grabs my hands and claps my hands together and he'll point to my nose and head etc but he refuses to point to his own nose and I just don't know if there is something in that or whether it's just he doesn't know he has these as he can't really see his own nose etc IFSWIM xx

If he's grabbing your hands to clap, and pointing to your nose etc then he's communicating with you which is a really good sign.

@Littlemiss82 I was 34weeksandcounting just changed my username! I have no idea how to use this app but if there's a private message function I am happy for you to message me to talk about it. I have suffered with anxiety and lots of things about parenting make me anxious, it may help to talk!! I totally get it!

The fact he's clapped once - brilliant, some babies honestly do something once and have mastered it and don't need to do it again. My little one sat up unaided at around 4 months and then didn't do it again until 9 months, I was so worried. Some children can't identify their own body parts until a lot later, the fact he's identifying yours is fab!! X

I have an 8 year old with autism and I also have a 15 month old baby who does not seem to have autism. Your baby sounds totally normal to me.

I think the real issue is your anxiety. You seem to be over-analysing your baby and over-worrying and fixating on things.

The best thing you can do for your baby is to address your anxiety and become a more laid-back parent as this will result in a happier life for you both.

@TinkerBell13672910 I would really like to have a chat with you, I'm not sure how this app works either, do I need to add you? Xx

@Littlemiss82
(Was tinker bell) keep changing my name 😂
I have pm'd you, don't know if it's worked xx

@Littlemiss82 ps I had to do it on the website rather than the app! Xx

He sounds 100% normal to me! My son didn't clap even once until 14 months and I don't even remember pointing being a thing I was meant to worry about? He started really getting some words at about 17 months, then a little explosion at 19 months and then by 2 was speaking in full sentences. Give him time.