Bolshy 2.9yo boy, would love any advice

[peachespaige]

Any ideas on how to stop a very strong minded 2.9 year old boy to STOP THROWING SAND?? Also he is a bit pushy and seems to "bang his friends" with his toys. I feel like I cant trust him and am sure I can see peoples faces drop as soon as we enter the sand pit/playgroup/park etc.
I am patient with him and do time out, putting him in the pram if naughty again etc nothing works and he goes straight back and does it again.
I feel like I cant go out.
Any tips....Please.

Do you actively play WITH him at these places or are you more watching him and stepping in when needed?

i had a lovely friend whose DS was like this. I think how she eventually dealt with it was by playing with him loads at parks and playgroups, distracting him immediately on to other things, just keeping him so busy and suggesting what he can do. It was intense for her and I think a bit isolating because so many mums talk to each other and let the kids get on with it. That's ok for most kids and mums but perhaps this is not what your ds needs - this kind of full on involvement from you - it won't be forever. Just for the time being.

oops the end bit was meant to say maybe your ds DOES need this kind of full on involvement from you

Actually he is much better when i spend the whole time with him. Its a bit tough with 9month old ds2 who is clingy. I would love to sit and have a coffee with everyone else but I guess it wont be forever. Thankyou.

If it helps I think it's a sign of being bright I felt that my friend's ds needed more involvement as he was getting bored without it, always looking for the next thing to do (which was often mischief!)

I can see how hard it will be with a baby along as well, but I do think you just have to ignore the mums and always launch in WITH your ds. It will be worth it in the end and as we've said it really won't be like this forever.

I had to be constantly playing with ds too at this age, not for the same reason, just that he was very clingy to me; it's just a case of doing it. TBH I'd always rather be playing with my ds than making pointless small talk with women I had little in common with....

You're right. mindless conversation is just that. Actually my good friends completely understand and their boys have their moments too. I find it exhausting and slightly upsetting because he is lovely really and very funny, also an extreamly kind sharer who gives everything away. He is bright and I am proud. (can you tell we have had a good afternoon).