What to do when the father of your children isn't a good one?

[y0ungMum]

Ok so I have been with my OH 6 years, we have two DC together but the problem is he isn't a good dad at all.
He screams and punishes when there literally isn't any need to (I think this is because he doesn't know any other way to get the children to stop acting up such as diverting their attention else where) he never really wants to interact, he isn't working at the minute but he'll just swan off during the day whenever he pleases with some random excuse of all of a sudden needing to do something, most of the time it seems like he just wants to be on his own. He is only good with them around other people, when it's just us he is literally unbearable to be around. I love him dearly but I don't know how much more I can take. I've seriously debating whether to tell him to leave as the children are 100% happier when he isn't here and they are quite literally angels for me but completely act up when he's around. I would possibly finish things with him if it wasn't for the fact we'd have to share custody and I know for a fact this would hurt my children more with them having to be alone without me there as he'll literally just shout. But the worst thing is he believes he's worlds best dad!
Please any advice I'm going crazy

Sorry, that is so tough. You'll get a lot more responses in the relationships section - maybe ask admin to move this thread there.

Your situation sounds awful and definitely needs to change. He shouldn't have unsupervised access if you do split - maybe worth recording how he is with them at home, just in case you need to prove it. You'll all be better off without him, but I understand the custody worries holding you back. Hopefully someone with more experience and better advice will come along soon

I've had a similar situation and I just had to talk to my partner about it, your situation is hard and it won't get better until you talk to your husband about it, maybe he'll change.