Teeth cleaning - very stubborn three-year-old

[lackofgravitas]

I know there is another teeth-cleaning thread going on, but that's a one-year-old, for whom there may still be hope, we have a far more entrenched situation.

DD has never liked having her teeth cleaned. As I informed her this evening, she has been having her teeth cleaned for getting on for three years (first two at four months) and she has never cooperated for more than a day or two at a time. We started out with minty toothpaste, so she would be used to it when she switches to adult toothpaste, but gave in a few months back and tried some pink sparkly toothpaste, for novelty. She has had conventional toothbrushes with familiar characters, she has an electric toothbrush with princesses on. She has had sticker charts, and she currently has an ongoing reward of a stamp (inky kind) on her hand or any other body part she fancies (any body part not currently covered in chicken pox, that is) if she cooperates reasonably well.

It just doesn't work. She gets a stamp for not being a complete and utter pain in the arse, rather than for cooperating nicely, as we want to show some appreciation when she's almost reasonable. She doesn't get a stamp when she makes either of us shout, which has been the last two nights in a row. It is incredibly frustrating, and is often just the lowest point of the day, just at the end when we're trying to wrap things up with a nice bath and bedtime.

Any ideas, anyone? [desparate]

Sit her on your knee and clean her teeth from sitting behind her. But first, let her clean them herself in front of a mirror. Let her play with the purple revealing dye first too. Get her to smile in the mirror and enjoy it! Get her to clean your teeth for you and Daddy's teeth etc. Make it fun and give her a role.

we use singing. The old "this is the way we clean our teeth on a cold and frosty morning" but we change it to suit.
ie, tonight it was "this is the way the easter bunny cleans his teeth before he goes to bed".
It doesn't always work but out of all the things we've tried, this works best for us.

All 3 of mine have been awkward at times - it does end up with DH & me holding them down and doing it quickly sometimes, although this is a horrid end to the day. Sorry not to be more help.
Chocadora - Where do you get the revealing dye from these days?

btw, has she been to the dentist yet?
With DS, his teeth cleaning behaviour improved beyond recognition after his first visit and the dentist telling him what to do.

Yep! DH and I sing as well, even when were pinning them down!!

Try telling her that you can see food on her teeth and need to scrub it off. e.g. I can see some choc buttons on your teeth, let me scrub them off. Repeat this until you have been through what she remebers eating during the day. My 3YO also thinks it fun if FiFi and Primrose have to queue up for their teeth to be cleaned. DD sits on my knee and this creates easy access. Good luck

have looked all over for link to teeth cleaning for a one year old - please can someone send a link x

mckenzie, she has been to the dentist - quite a few times actually, she's been coming for six-monthly check-ups with me ever since the first one that came up after she got teeth. The last time was a while ago though, we may be due, and she is FAR more canny that only a few months ago, really much more likely to go for the idea of an authority figure telling her something. I will try to remember to ask him to explain things to her when we next go!

All good ideas, am filing away! Also filing away that we're not the only people to pin their child down to clean their teeth ... we are SO wary of giving her a complex, but it's just got to be done. She has a terribly sweet tooth, inherited from DH, and we have yet to find out if she has inherited the nasty weak enamel condition from him as well.

ThisEasterTime: Here

thanks log

chocolateface - we get our plaque revealer from the dentist as supermarket doesn't have it. I suspect Boots still has it though. Trouble is that the children fight over it and beg to use it every night and it can get a bit messy!

I have to say one thing (probably the only thing) I have never done is pin dd down to do it. Teeth cleaning is something thatt has to be done so I never wanted to have to hold her down and force it on her as I think this can just cause more problems.

DD used to be awful a lot better now. The dentist siad to me the most important part is to get toothpaste in her mouth on a brush twice a day than actually scrub them and make a big issue of it. He also said that most toothpastes aimed wt children don;t have enough of someothing or other in them will have a look at the tubes I have next time I am in the bathroom and to read the sides of them all.

Have you tried getting her to brush your teeth at the same time you do hers it is difficult but it may help. I used to do my tetth with dd and she always wanted to do mine so we swopped. We have also reached a compromise, in the morning before nursery dd gets to do her own teeth, I put the paste on leave it on the sink and send her up and if she does that she must let me or her dad do them at night. If she refuses she loses the option to do her own in the morning. At 3 she should be reasonably abe to understand aomething like that.

I think as the adults we get far too stressed about these things and that stress turns it into an issue for everyone. Try and relax, get her a mirror at her own height and go gently first letting her do her won without you hanging over her she will probably just chew the brush but at least the brush and paste are going in there and work up gently.

I have disclosing tablets, and am holding them in reserve - happy to report they are blue, and DD will probably be very keen to do away with blue teeth.

Tonight DH was banished from the bathroom, and we had a chat about teeth-cleaning ... it wasn't going very well until I opted for taking the piss out of DD's pretend-crying, which actually amused her (it made my nose run). She then perked up a bit and let me point out and clean off all the bits of food I could 'see' in her mouth (mostly Easter egg).

Not bad ... will see how tomorrow is.

We sometimes have bother with our DD and we use the following tactics...

• She is allowed to brush her teeth in the morning, we do it at night.

• She brushes our teeth whilst we brush hers.

• She is not allowed sugary foods if she does not have her teeth cleaned properly afterwards. The chocolate ban usually works.

• She has seen my grey fillings!

• If she is good, she gets two stories at bedtime.

• She has two toothbrushes and can choose which one she wants us to use.

• We make funny faces and noises to get her to open her mouth, and encourage shouting at the top of her voice!

• My Hubby pretends to be the dentist whilst brushing her teeth (and then she does it to him).

We had this about 6 months ago, but she told us that sometimes it hurt when we brushed her teeth (I think in my anxiety to make sure her teeth was clean, i was brushing too hard). Now she tells me when its too rough, she also knows that we mean business, that we will clean her teeth or she faces a punishment ( we don't hold her down though) and now she has come through the other side, and accepts it providing we use one of the above strategies!
HTH

we just get them all to shout argh very very loudly - they can't resist joining in.