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8 Year Old Daughter with low self image

1 reply

Nephology · 17/09/2017 19:41

Hello All,

Sorry if this is the wrong place to post, I'm a newbie so still learning my way around.

I guess im looking for some advice or reassurance.

My daughter has moved up to year 4 this year and so far so good. The only thing is her new teacher believes she has a low self image of herself.

I know with schooling she isn't the most confident person. It hasn't helped that we moved schools and her new school isn't very good but the only one we could get into.

My daughter has always been a confident, strong person, so much so that she's over confident. This has led to her having challenging behaviour towards me and we've ended up in massive rows. I've lost my temper and so has she and we've both ended up in tears.

I'm now worrying that this is my fault as we've had some bad weeks where I feel like all I've done is tell her off.

We had a chat today and she thinks she's a bad person. Her actual perspective is slightly off as she classses being naughty every morning (but well behaved all day) is her being bad all of the time. We've chatted and I explained that it's not all of the time, yes mornings aren't always good but the rest of the days she's great. I've explained we all have bad days and good days but that's okay.

I know now I've got to make more of an effort to focus on the good she does. we're bringing back the reward book so we focus on the good she achieves during the day and I've got to start picking my battles with her.

I just feel like a terrible mum cos I blame myself, I'm worried I've made this happen because im on her case all of the time.

Does anyone have a child that's so confident and challenging to only be told they've got self image issues. And what did you do to help them?

TIA x

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
dressinblack · 17/09/2017 19:59

My DS who is 6 is very similar.
I focus on reminding him of his achievements (we keep a folder of certificates and the such which we look through every so often) and will compliment him. When he receives a compliment I ask him to repeat it back to me, sometimes he refuses saying it isn't true but after some persuasion and a humourus distraction he will do it.

It is so difficult as he is beautiful (they all are) and so funny and intelligent I wish he could see it for himself.

I try not to allow him to see me putting myself down and if he does fail at something I do my best to spin it into a positive.

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