Feel like a failure today

[thingsthatgobumpinthenightouch]

Got asked today at nursery if ds (just turned 2) had ever been on a bike or ride on type time. He has a couple of times but doesn't show any interest. I very much suspect autism and he takes a long time to take to things. He would never push a walker etc. They said he seemed scared to try the bike that the other kids were playing with but did watch. I felt like I had failed and found myself over explaining that he didn't walk till 18 months and was scared of outside for a long time. He is also very big and over the weight limit for a lot of these type of toys. I totally feel like I was being judged and it made me feel terrible. I realise this probably isn't the way it was meant but I suffer from anxiety so I tend to worry more than I should and take things to heart. Don't even know why I am posting, just feel crappy.

Plenty of children in the history of the world have led lovely lives without being on a bike or ride-along before the age of TWO, for goodness's sake!

You keep doing you. It sounds like you have a keen understanding of what your DS is and isn't ready for.

Maybe they're suggesting it to help with his weight?
Don't worry about it! They all have different interests

I suspect they have a box on a list they want to tick.

It is in no way obligatory for every child to play with every sort of toy. That's why we give them choices. Maybe he just doesn't like how they feel. That is perfectly valid and no reflection on you or your parenting.

Some children won't try something until they feel confident that they can be successful. They will watch their peers then, one day, try it themselves and do it perfectly. That's perfectly OK too.

Have you looked into getting an assessment for autism? Some parents are told that two is too young to assess but early intervention does make a difference so, if it's something you want to pursue, you can go to your GP and ask for a referral to a paediatrician.

Alternatively, you could look for an online or face to face support group for parents of children with autism. In my experience, they have a wealth of experience and support to offer parents in your position.

I have spoken to the health visitor on a couple of occasions and he has been referred to SALT but we are still waiting for an appointment. They wanted to wait till his 27 month review to look at him again as he showed some improvement with the removal of tomatoes from his diet. It's about 6 weeks away so going to mention it again. He also has allergy testing soon so I am hoping that helps too as he is clearly still reacting to something but I can't quite figure out what.

He very much won't try things till he thinks he can do them. He was like that with walking, very late at doing it but was running within 2-3 days. He point blank wouldn't walk with help from anyone or a walker but would cruise. He is mr independent!