16 month old becoming a pariah

[Mamawingingit1234]

My DD is 16 almost 17months old and has over the last few weeks taken to patting/hitting other children on their heads, grabbing clothes and pulling them towards her and poking faces.

For the most part I don't think she's doing it in a mean, nasty way but it does come off aggressive and upsets 99% of the kids she does it to.

She doesn't go to nursery so I make it a point of going to classes almost everyday so she's get the social interaction and so on but I'm so worried she's going to become a pariah and when she learns to play with other kids parent/kids won't want her to.

I always intervene and tell her that's not how we play/use gentle hands/don't hit and so on but it doesn't seems to be working.

Today we were at book bugs and I swear some of the mums were treating us differently. Then she pulled her friend (I'm good friends with his mum and we see them weekly) in to a rough hug and fell backwards causing her to bump her head against the wall resulting in her sobbing (the boy was fine - DD cushioned his landing) and I swear one or two of the mums gave a look.

What can I do?

Words of wisdom/advise/tips and tricks please pass my way.

It sounds to me like you're doing all that can be expected of you tbh.

Some DCs hit/push/snatch/bite, they're just being children and learning how to interact. All we as parents can do is to supervise closely and intervene when our DC do something unkind.

FWIW, the only time this kind of thing bothers me at playgroups is when the parent either wasn't watching closely enough, or (worse) saw what happened and chose to ignore. It is really important IMO for you to take responsibility for your DC;s behaviour and apologise where necessary.

On the plus side, I've got more than one mum friendship that arose from their DC hitting/biting mine, them apologising, me empathising and, y'know, people being nice to one another...

Perhaps going to sessions every day is too much? at 16 months they really only need SOME social interaction. It doesn't need to be daily.

Once a week is fine!

Actually, I'd say the opposite...up the sessions and make social interaction part of the norm for your DD.

My DC isn't in nursery either and I make a conscious effort to include social interaction with peers into every day, as much of it as I can tbh.

I'm also reading a book called 'How to talk so little kids will listen' which seems excellent so far. A lot of stuff about acknowledging how they are feeling etc. Might be worth a go?

Wide OP said she goes nearly every day...that's a LOT of input for a small child. It's not like nursery which has a routine and is in the same place...different classes/sessions daily....sounds like too much for most toddlers.

Neither of mine went to any setting without me till the age of 3...both are sociable and have lots of friends aged 12 and 9.

wide Oh I will definitely get that book. I love that type of thing.

mrsovertheroad she loves going to classes and it's the same weekly routine. She is less fractious when we go to classes versus staying at home all day.

Thanks for the feedback girls xx