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Original poster

Does anyone else have an extremely irritating 3 year old??

80 replies

quietmouse · 21/03/2007 09:47

My dd is 3yrs 4mths. Atm I find I am constantly irritated by her

All she seems to do is whinge and moan all day and she needs constant attention.

She talks non stop

but everything is a moan with her.

She also will not let my ds help her with anything and tends to fly of the handle easily if he tries to (like putting her shoes on etc) everything has to be me.

She also tends to attack him quite a lot (although he sometimes winds her up)

She can be a really lovely little girl. She is funny and bright but oh, so annoying atm!!

Just looking for some reassurance really that other children this age are like this? I don't really remember what ds was like

I am a bit paranoid about her atm as she had a head injury 3 months ago and I worry that her change in behaviour is related to that and permanent although people try to remind me that she was a bit annoying before too!

She is also at the annoying stage of not being able to walk very far and I end up carrying her everywhere. If I don't we have a major tantrum and she normally ends up falling over and doing herself yet another injury!

Anyone else in the same boat, please?

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BendandBreak · 21/03/2007 11:12

My dd2 is 3.4 and thinks she is the boss of the household. She is definitely a little spoilt.
She talks non-stop AT THE TOP OF HER VOICE, shouts at her sister (6), helps herself to biscuits (my fault for leaving them within reach), wees/ poos in her potty and doesn't tell you, refuses to have teeth brushed by whoever is ready with the toothpaste and wants the other parent ONLY, is never ready to be bathed/ washed/ dressed when you need her to, eats only a bit of food herself and then asks for Mummy to help feed her, etc etc etc.
Need I go on?
I have recently bought reward charts and they work a bit, but sometimes, she wants a cross! I really got them for sleeping in her own bed but tonight (after being up 4 times last night to "sit on the carpet" beside her bed till she fell back asleep) we are going to do RAPID RETURN. Wish me luck......(hands together in prayer)

margo1974 · 21/03/2007 11:15

We have got the silly little cry going on in my house. I feel like curling up in a corner, sticking my fingers in my ears and saying "la la la, I can't hear you" until DH comes home

TrinityRhino · 21/03/2007 11:16

I have an exceedingly anoying, short tempered, unpredicatable, 'no' shouting, non eating, danger to herself and others, crazy but otherwise adorablt cute 23 month old. I'll swap her for a 3 year old any day

MrsBoo · 21/03/2007 12:53

Does your little 'darling' behave the same in front of your DH/DP? I am almost positive my DD is much worse with me. However that could be because I let it bother me, and he can just ignore it.
My DD seems to be so frustrated with everything all the time - poor little thing. She uses a really whiny voice ALL the time, doesn't want a nappy at night "cos I'm a big girl" - but she's not dry at night yet; wants to wear sandals and shorts in the winter; PJ's to day nursery; wellies all the time; whines about all the food I give her, attacks her big brother all the time, runs away if we're out anywhere.
I am hopeless at managing her, and can't wait for her to grow out of it all.

danceswithaSPRINGinherstep · 21/03/2007 13:01

This thread has really made me laugh. I feel your pain! DD is generally v. good but the dawdling, whingeing and WHY? all the time can be very wearing!
This morning:
DD - I'm taking the brush with me (to play group)
ME - Ok
DD - Why is it a brush?
ME - well it's something for brushing hair with

DD - but what does a brush mean?
ME - it's just the name of a brush
DD - why?
ME - just because...

Original poster
quietmouse · 21/03/2007 13:01

I don't have one! so I bear the full brunt of it which can be really tiring tbh.

By bed time I sometimes go into meltdown myself and unfortunately my ds seems to be the one I tell off, poor thing, even though he's been at school all day!

although, yes, I think she saves it all up for me. I'm not sure what she's like at nursery (she's only been there a couple of months) but I don't know if they would tell you if your child whinged?!

My mum finds her very annoying and will sometimes snap at her, particularly if she is pushing her in her buggy and she does her favourite of jumping out mid push, normally as my mum is half way across a main road......

OP posts:
Original poster
quietmouse · 21/03/2007 13:03

this thread makes me sound like a really horrible mum reading it back - she is my world, really! such a bright, funny little girl - and my mum doesn't find her annoying all the time! oh god what a bad mother I sound!

OP posts:
wheresthevalium · 21/03/2007 13:15

No it doesn't QM My DD2 is exactly the same. Does yours have selective deafness too?

staceym11 · 21/03/2007 13:19

doesnt make you sound bad at all, i started something similar about my 2.6yo dd as she talks constantly wont do as asked, refuses to eat/bath etc etc. and everything has been whingy, since she had a bad cold and temp a few weeks ago!!! hopefully she'll move on soon!

atm shes a bit happier as is being potty trained and thinks shes a big girl!!!

staceym11 · 21/03/2007 13:20

oh yes, selective deafness, looking in the other direction like you dont exist.........this one however doesnt go away! i know i was doing it well into teenagehood!

wanderingstar · 21/03/2007 13:37

The thing that keeps me going is that my ds2 at the same age was, if anything, worse, but for some reason snapped out of being a pain almost overnight at about 3.5...here's hoping.

notsoladyjess · 21/03/2007 14:16

this thread has made me feel so much better. i am having a mare with ds1 at the mo - he is 3.4yrs old and is SO fussy about everything, wants to do everything by himself (except tidying up), screams his head off when i put him to bed at night (when he used to go down with no fuss), is obsessed with power rangers when he has never even watched it, says he hates things and suddenly decides he does not like his friends anymore, refuses to talk to my mum, etc, etc..
and the tantrums are heinous, wailing for 20 mins.

quietmouse - you are not a horrible mother. i have been feeling gulity about not liking ds1 or ds2 actually lately! it really helps to know i am not alone.

Lazycow · 21/03/2007 17:03

Aghhhhh

I've read this and am in a panic. Ds does many of these things but he'd only 2.4 years old.

I was convinced he'd grow out of them by 3/4 years old - Now I can see he might not - help !!!!!

FrannyandZooey · 21/03/2007 17:14

I found from 3 till about 3 and half was pretty hard work. We are just over that hump, I think, at nearly 4 things are MUCH better

staceym11 · 21/03/2007 17:23

lazycow, my dd does all this too and shes 2.6, maybe they've hit it early and will get over it by then...lets live in hope!

GreatGooglyMoogly · 21/03/2007 17:33

DS1 is 3 in a couple of weeks and has been going through a "why?" phase which I find particularly irritating. Also DS2 (14 months) has now become a rival as he is quite mobile and is now allowed to play with most toys, so we have snatching/ lack of sharing to contend with as well. You're definitely not alone

GreatGooglyMoogly · 21/03/2007 17:36

Oh yes, I just remembered how negative he is about everything at the moment as well:

"I don't want x"
"I don't like x"
"I don't want to do x"
"Nooo!"
etc

All good fun

Troutpout · 21/03/2007 17:39

Extremely high maintenance 4 year old? will that do?...she was just the same at 3...so i reckon it counts
You have my utmost sympathy

Original poster
quietmouse · 21/03/2007 18:12

good to see I have company!

How are everyone's little whingers this evening? Mine has been a lot less whingey today which has been amazing

OP posts:
sunnysideup · 21/03/2007 18:30

quietmouse, my ds is five this year and I definitely think 3 was the most challenging age (so far ). He was never whiny as you describe for which I am eternally grateful, but he did have some humdingingly huge tantrums at this age......

It really does get easier, they get much easier to be with and at four ds is my good friend, we can now do some lovely things together in a companionable way without the feeling that you are having to 'manage' any behaviour....of course we have the odd challenge but it's so different now.

keep faith with her, she will come to the age of reason

tortoiseSHELL · 21/03/2007 18:34

Dd can be a real PITA - she is gorgeous most of the time, but OMG she can be annoying! The thing that winds me up the most is just not doing things when we're in a hurry - not walking, not going to the toilet etc etc, and of course the whinging!

ScoobyDooooo · 21/03/2007 18:37

My ds was like this at this age, then he had a good spurt now he is 4.6 & is even worse, defo ready for school roll on september

edam · 21/03/2007 18:42

So, it isn't just mine then? Phew... I do love him but he is so uncooperative, spends his time dawdling/ignoring my requests/shouting at me if I insist... we are usually the last ones to leave school (nursery) after all the kids at the comprehensive next door because he wants to play with everything in the playground. Takes me an hour to get him home - I can walk the distance in 15 minutes!

pucca · 21/03/2007 18:44

Quietmouse...

Your dd could be my dd atm, ditto everything you said, i thought it was just me

Everything is "why?" i look foward to some peace and quiet when she goes to bed then i feel terribly guilty!

twoisenoughmum · 21/03/2007 18:44

In answer to the OP - Yes, I do. But I love him to bits and he loves me more than any other human has ever loved me (including DD, 6) and every morning I wake up and remind myself of this fact and just try and grit my teeth and get on with it. And reading threads like this makes me feel soooo much better when I realise his behaviour is standard practice for a 3 year old. Perhaps its because I'm an older Mum or perhaps its because I really listen to parents of the older generation who say things like "make the most of it while they're little because before you know it they will be ... teenagers" ... that I just try and appreciate him for what he is and not wish his little life away. That sounds smug, not meant to, just trying to share what helps me get through the day.