is it ok to ask how many tantums does your toddler have daily? .... and what should I do???

[mammyoftwo]

Maybe I'm shaming myself already by admitting 2.5yo toddler has daily tantums? maybe other dc have them less frequently?

the first could be before leaving their bedroom, let alone breakfast. When they get really annoyed, it could last 45-60 minutes (screaming, crying, snotty nose, laying on floor hitting/kicking it. dc1 wouldn't normally hit or kick others during tantrum, the only time this has happened is when dp or I lifted them to another room and then nipped during this unwanted journey)

dc2 arrived I don't have time to properly read any parenting books (I'm not counting the occasional article posted on fb), so have no idea what I'm doing? as dc1 is the first, I'm just not sure how much to ignore tantrums and walk away, or to "give attention" and give out/tell off etc. I'm not confident about knowing if this is "normal" toddler behaviour, or if they are being really badly behaved and I need to do more?

All advice and reflections on your experiences welcome, please!!!!

I am in the same boat as you and just posted about it.

There is a daily meltdown, sometimes more. Sometimes she's so tired it's several a day, easily triggered if I put a foot wrong.

I think it might be normal...

does your toddler sleep during day or has that been dropped?
mine has stopped them, so i know that's part of it late afteroon/eve, but doesn't account for mornings

Yes she just dropped her nap. Around 4pm she has a huge meltdown like clockwork

it's so hard

Yes daily tantrums here, ranging between mini meltdowns to full blown meltdowns constantly really. It's very draining. You're not alone!

what age is your toddler highneeds? is this your first?

2 years 1 month. Yes first and last ha!

2.5 year old DS with daily tantrums here too. Sometimes I think the way we react to him causes it to escalate. We're trying to set boundaries and differentiate between what is right and wrong behaviour or actions. I think in being so strict sometimes we cause the tantrum or make it bigger than it needs to be? I don't know...but I'm just holding on for him getting older and being able to rationalise/ explain things to him properly!

i know, frustration re communicating what they want to say seems to be a factor. also we've been toilet training so dc1 mentally exhausted from that

15 month old here .
All the bloody time .
Terrible twos come early

Yes, 24 months and almost constant. Particularly bad when tired or hungry but really just generally not getting their way sets them off too. I dread leaving places, or bed time or really any time I have to say no. He's a lovely wee boy but man, he doesn't half have a temper.

2.5 year old going on 12, it is honestly so hard. I feel I'm firm but fair with her, we do a lot of fun things & she has a lot of my attention & time. Good routine & nap. But god can she throw a wobbler when things don't go her way over the most ridiculous things. Screaming, hitting, kicking, throwing herself around. Had an epic one the other day because she wanted to put her cardi on (she wasn't wearing one nor did we have one with us). She simply refused to accept I couldn't Magic one out of thin air.

I feel it for you, I really do. They are seriously draining and hard going. And often she's over it & jm still upset from it and questioning why and whether I handled it correctly. Wish I had some answers for you. You aren't alone though! Hope they come through it soon x

ds2 is just 2. He has started having tantrums in the last month, having 3-10 daily. They are a nightmare but it is a phase!!! It will go away don't panic. I find getting a bit of child free time and going to bed early ( ie as much sleep as poss) help slightly.
...and too much diet coke and chocolate....

Thanks ladies, is it wrong I feel better knowing it's not just my own dc who's at this craic?!

Stay strong, we got this! albeit one hour at a time!!