DS1 dropped daytime nap but he can't cope HELP

[happypiglet]

DS1 has dropped his daytime nap at 3 (which I thought was fine). But he just cannot cope without it and his behaviour has got worse and worse. Last night he had the screaming adjabs all through bath and bedtime including kicking and screaming etc.
By Thursday (after his nursery day on Wednesday) he is complaining of being tired at 9am but refuses to sleep.
He has huge bags under his eyes.
It isn't helped by the fact that he only gets around 10.5 to 11 hrs at night as his dad gets up at 5.50am to go to work and DS1 is so keen to see him he gets up too.
Does anyone know how much sleep a 3yr old should have?
I do have quiet time at lunch whilst DS2 sleeps with a bit of TV and puzzles or drawing.
Often he falls asleep literally in his tea at 5pm.
Its driving me mad. He starts pre school after Easter 3 mornings a week and I am not sure he will cope.
I have thought about putting him to bed earlier- any advice gratefully received.

Put him to bed at 5.30pm if he is going to continue getting up at 5.30am. bath him at another time of day. he needs more sleep than he is letting himself get right now. And preschool will wipe him for the first few weeks.

Yes maybe putting him to bed earlier will do the trick. He will gradually get used to dropping the daytime nap. Good luck!

I think they all find it hard when they drop a nap but then they do seem to adjust. 530 wake up is very early though, maybe you should bring tea, bath & bed forward!?

Can he catch up at the weekends? I try and go for a drive around 1pm on a Sat and Sun - ds then has 1-2 hours sleep and stays up a little later at night - but seems to sort him out.

I'd agree with getting him to bed earlier. My DS dropped his sleep about 3 months ago at 2.6yrs and he was really struggling by teatime. It felt wierd putting him to bed so early but once I did that, and he started getting about 12hrs sleep it all changed.

LOL at kippification! I seem to spend a good portion of each day in this state ...

I have pretty much binned DS' nap now as he stopped going to sleep most days...he will still have the occasional one if he's been swimming / to soft play.

His behaviour did deteriorate a bit initially and he is soemtimes pretty horrendous by teatime and I have brought his bedtime forward by 1/4 hour (would put him to bed earlier but he wouldn't see DH otehrwise) so he goes to bed (sleep) at 7pm and usually awake between 7 & 7.30 am. No way could he survive on less than 12 hours.

We have a Bobification hour, usually when he gets home from nursery at 1, when he rests ont he sofa watching a Bob the Builder dvd, and I rest with him after my morning at work. He doesn;t sleep (I sometimes do though ) but he does chill for an hour or so.

Thanks everyone- I can't really bring bed forward too much or he will see even less of DH which is already an issue.
I've tried TV and at least he is sitting still but he does not zombie in front of it.
But at least I know I am not alone in this!!
I guess I will just have to ride it out- I am hoping preschool might zonk him out enough to reinstate a short nap after lunch.