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Behaviour/development

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5 year old daughters behaviour ruining our family life

1 reply

Deegsie · 06/05/2017 21:07

Our 5 year old has no respect, is demanding, bossy, physically and verbally abusive and angry. She is also anxious, controlling, jealous of her little sister. She can also be delightful, funny, clever, kind but it is hard to remember this when her bad behaviour takes over which it does multiple times per day. She is very bright, confident and well behaved at school and always receives amazing reports and gets multiple achievement awards. She is also well behaved with our child minder. This makes me suspect that this is a behavioural problem rather than a health issue.
Our nearly 3 year old is easy chilled out, sweet, easily makes friends. She is also scared of her big sister when she has these outbursts.
Myself and my husband are distraught. This ebbs away most our enjoyment of family life and leaves us feeling miserable and stressed. We sometimes have some escapism with the odd date night, even a trip to a spa the other week which was necessary but it is taking it's toll on the whole family. Family life is very important to me but it is the place that I hate the most right now.
I have had a visit to the GP and two phone calls. Each time they messaged the school nurse. She visited in January and gave me some leaflets about parenting and mangng children's behaviour. She also phoned yesterday and will be referring me to a parenting course once she has spoken to my health visitor which she should get the chance to speak to her 'within the next two weeks'.
Can anyone tell me if there are any other more urgent resources I can access? I am happy to pay and go private. I will do anything. I realise the turnaround required needs to start with me. I am a responsible parent and the behaviour of my child is in my hands through good parenting but I need support and coaching.
Thank you for reading, I look forward to your suggestions and advice. X x x

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
FrayedHem · 07/05/2017 11:07

Sorry things are difficult. Is the behaviour new, or has it been going on for a while? Are there any specific triggers you've noted?

You may find the book "The Explosive Child" worth a read. I've no personal experience, but the triple p parenting course is supposed to be good and I think they run online courses, though there is a fee I think.

In terms of outside help, it sounds like you are stuck in a loop with the GP. I think you either go back and clarify what you want a referral for - possibly a development paediatrician or a clinical psychologist, or look at accessing one of those privately.

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