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DD (2.8) is obsessed with the feeling of T-shirt collars - anyone else's kids have weird fetishes like this? Is it normal?

40 replies

Astrophe · 01/03/2007 23:20

She just started obsessively fiddling with t-shirt collars over the past 3 months or so - she says she likes 'the lines'. She'll wander around the house feeling her collar, or if she is not wearing a t-shirt she'll fiddle with her baby brother's, or get a shirt from her cupboard and drag it round!

She also started thumb sucking a few months earlier, having never thumb sucked before.

A few other things tell me she is a bit insecure atm - she has bad dreams occasionally and has started coming into our bed at night, and she is displaying lots of attention seeking behaviour - tipping over food/drinks, pushing her brother etc.

Apart from there things, and most of the time she is bright and happy, but the sum of these things has got me a bit worried.

Am I being silly? Does anyone else have any experience of these things?

Thanks

OP posts:
emmatomATO · 01/03/2007 23:24

I reckon it's all totally normal behaviour.

My ds, when about 2 - 3 years, started twiddling with ears. If he was lying on his own he'd be happy to twiddle with his own or if on my lap he's love to twiddle with mine.

Used to send me all dozy actually!!

Lasted for quite some time with no other symptoms and he then grew out of it.

Your dds other behaviour sounds like normal attention seeking behaviour if she is a little bit jealous of her baby brother.

I'm sure lots of reassurance is all that's needed.

colditz · 01/03/2007 23:27

Awwww, let her have a t shirt to fiddle with. i used to love fiddling with certain things when I was a kid. It was really soothing, like having your fingers stroked. I am still a fiddler now, really.

emmatomATO · 01/03/2007 23:30

Oh yes, and my dd, when about 2 used to suck her thumb and at the same time, siddle up to be and try and grab some part of my clothing with the fingers of the same hand she was sucking.

If she was around my legs it would be my skirt or nightie. I then cut up an old nightie of mine and she used to love sniffing it scrunched up in her hand as she sucked her thumb. Just a comfort thing isn't it.

Astrophe · 01/03/2007 23:33

I do let her fiddle - am actually considering buying a piece of that ribbed fabric and making her a little bracelet or similar, to stop her dragging a t-shirt with her wherever she goes!

Yes, she is def jealous of baby brother. We are very aware of this and doing our best to encourage her and make a fuss of her, but it doesn't seem to be helping her behaviour, esp now ds is walking.

OP posts:
colditz · 01/03/2007 23:48

Ds1 has a newly mobile and engaging rival. Now when he feels ignored he is 'poorly'.

I have gently tried to explain the difference between poorly and bored, poorly and sad, poorly and tired, and poorly and needing a poo, to no avail.

Novacane · 02/03/2007 00:03

Well im 27 years old and I have a 'cudgy' that I fiddle with, and I still suck my thumb (in private and sometimes in public when I forget where I am)

It feels lovely and comforting and safe.
Don't see anything wrong with it, and definately wouldn't discourage it.

serenity · 02/03/2007 01:13

When DD is feeling 'hard done by' she likes to sit on my lap with her arm down the front of my top She also does it when she's a bit stressed - so if we have visitors for example! I've asked why she does it (she's 3.4) and I get the idea it's comforting so I live with it atm (not in public obviously)

Sunyshineymummy · 02/03/2007 08:33

I know a 38 year old who still carries ribbons round with her to run through her fingers. She was quite the high flyer until she had her children so I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.

admylin · 02/03/2007 09:06

Twiddling with ears, emmatomATO, that reminded me of when I was au pair in France. The little boy loved nothing more than to twiddle with his dads ears. One day he was doing it in the car from the back seat to the drivers seat and he turned to me and said, " would you like to rub daddy too?" all ready tomove over so I could have the free ear! It was his way of saying he accepted me. The dad had a coughing/laughing fit!

emmatomATO · 02/03/2007 09:08

Admylin

ipanemagirl · 02/03/2007 09:24

my ds has to stroke my knuckles while he sucks his fingers

mamma2kids · 02/03/2007 12:45

Keys, then the washing up brush (which he took everywhere) now likes the instructions to his power ranger phone!

JackieNo · 02/03/2007 12:49

DS (3) likes labels in clothes, so much so that he's constantly got his hand down the back of his trousers rubbing the silky label in there - we're trying to stop him feeling those particular labels (he can usually get at one in his top instead), as it looks rather strange. Thumb in mouth, hand stuck down the back of his trousers.

southeastastra · 02/03/2007 12:49

she sounds like my sister Astrophe, she is 40 and still likes to feel silky things, though she grew out of thumb sucking.

DumbledoresGirl · 02/03/2007 12:52

Yes, I used to have a label obsessed child too. He liked wearing clothes with those little external tags and he would fiddle with them constantly. Also, I wasn't allowed to cut labels off soft toys as they were his favourite bit of the toy too.

At the same age (2 upwards) he also had a strange aversion to stickers and would get quite upset if anyone tried to put a sticker on him eg the dentist or charity collectors or at playgroup.

This odd behaviour (or maybe not odd?) lasted a few years. He outgrew the love of labels before he outgrew his aversion to stickers, but he did outgrow both eventually!

Astrophe · 02/03/2007 12:55

thanks, this is all very reassuring!

OP posts:
DumbledoresGirl · 02/03/2007 12:55

Interestingly, my label obsessed ds2 was also jealous of younger sister - the only one of my children to have sibling jealousy. I never put the two things together until reading this thread.

emmatomATO · 02/03/2007 12:57

My 50 year old sister loves the smell of paper.

I have countless times found her with her head in between the pages of a brand spanking new Yello Pages!

tissy · 02/03/2007 12:58

My dd(5) still likes to hold my ear when she needs security/ reassurance!

themoon66 · 02/03/2007 13:01

DS was obsessed with the plastic backs on bibs. They had to be the slightly textured variety though, not smooth. And he wouldn't wear any item of clothing with buttons for years.

The bibs had to be held against his nose so he could smell the plastic whilst drifting off to sleep and sucking his middle two fingers.

bandstand · 02/03/2007 13:19

my ds started carrying round his daddy's teshirt, still got a version of it, when i was in hspital have c.sec. He was 2.5,
his sister f#fiddled with her hair all the time,
otehr sister had a "sheet" which "felt" just right to her fingers.

CheesyFeet · 02/03/2007 13:27

my 2.8yo dd is another ear twiddler

especially when she's tired

I sucked my thumb until I was 12 and had a velvet toy that I stroked until all the fluff came out - still miss it sometimes!

Frizbe · 02/03/2007 21:55

Thumb in and hair twiddling here Astro

Legacy · 02/03/2007 22:00

Ooh - DumbleDoresG - same here! DS2 (now 4) LOVES labels - and especially the long, silky ones e.g. in M&S clothing...(will go to sleep holding the label in his PJs )

AND he used to have a strong aversion to stickers too. Not too bad now - lots to deal with at school, sticker-wise - but he still takes them off as soon as he gets home...

KezzaG · 02/03/2007 22:00

Oh silky material is just the best. I am 35 and have to have a square of an M&S dressing gown in bed with me to stroke. (Originally started when I was 3 and my sister was born) In fact it is usually with me where ever I am in the house, so comforting

If I out and go to the loo I always make time for a quick feel of the label in my knickers