Have you had any support for yourself from your own GP? If not, an appointment for yourself might help, to discuss how you're feeling and whether you've got signs of depression as a result of the strain of all this.
It sounds incredibly hard going. Do you have a partner who shares the load / understands how difficult it is? Do you have family or friends locally who help out at all and see the same behaviour?
You say CAMHS are involved, so I'm assuming you're expecting some kind of diagnosis from them for your dd. (Notoriously under staffed and in extremely high demand across the country, but should provide excellent support when you do see them and hopefully they coordinate additional support at school if that's needed).
Are you able to have a break away from the house / dd on a regular basis for yourself? I think if that's possible it will be invaluable to you - eg an hour in a cafe with a magazine / an hour swimming etc. Just so you can switch off for that one hour.
Can you break the elements of her challenges down in categories like you've done in your op and work out strategies for dealing with them / ignoring. I'd say sleep is probably the toughest, as if that's affecting your own sleep too then it's going to be making a tough situation even more difficult. But eg eating, does she refuse to eat / refuse certain foods / throw food/ misbehave at the table? Can you have some basic meal time family rules she will understand that address her behaviour? And just a simple consequence if she doesn't follow them. So that you can hopefully reduce the stress for yourself and you both know if she does a b or c z happens. If she doesn't eat, there's nothing until next meal time.
Are there any activities she does enjoy that might help you bond if she's not emotionally demonstrative? Arts and crafts, reading, last oking at pictures or swimming or walks in the park etc?
It's hard to make specific suggestions without knowing more detail but I hope I'm not offending with any of these ideas. Does she have a structured routine? Sometimes a very reliable pattern to the day can help with challenging behaviour, just so there are no surprises / no rushing and stress / nothing unexpected.