I need advice on how to deal with DS and his dislike of DD2

[zephyrcat]

DS is 2.8, dd2 is 10 months old. There is also DD1 in the equasion who is 5.2.

DD1 and DS are very close and always have been. When DD2 was born, DS was 21 months and was ok with her - a little jealous but liked to hold her and have a cuddle. Lately the dimensions are changing and ds is getting increasingly nasty to dd2.

DD1 has now started school so I thought that ds and dd2 would get a bit closer as it is just the two of them at home but it's the opposite. Ds is not impressed at all! He shouts at her, snatches toys from her - evern her own toys and will lash out at her now and then.

Whenever he has hit me (he's only just starting to do this) he never hesitates to say sorry and have a hug, same with dd1, but he will never say sorry to dd2. He would rather get sent up to his room than say sorry to her.

Is it likely to be just a phase? I don't force them together but I try to get him involved with her and get him to laugh at things with her so he can see that she can be fun but it doesn't last.

What should I do with him?

Maybe its because she's become more mobile now and he doesn't like it.

It's definately got worse since she is all over the place and into everything. But what do I do with ds?

Perhaps you could send him to sit somewhere other than his room when he does this. Somewhere where he hasn't got toys etc to play with so its boring. We use the stairs in our house but a chair at the table or even just sitting in the corner would do. I think in the end if you stick with it he will realise that he's better off not being mean to his sister. Good luck

I think its a normal kind of phase, particularly if your youngest has just started moving around.

When my 2 were this age I used to make up games for them to play together e.g. DD has crashed her car and DS had to go to rescue her.

Also I used to make DD "say" nice things to DS - I'd pretend she'd whispered something to me about him that was nice or when she laughed I'd say she was laughing at something funny he'd done.

Sounds corny but it helped.

Now they are older they really love playing with each other and she is more likely to hit him than vica versa.

He came over just now while she was sitting on my knee and knocked her dummy out of her mouth with his hand quite hard and shouted at her for no reason. I told him off and made him go and sit on the stairs. He started trshing the place and shouting in temper. DD2 is now up in her cot and he is an angel.

Just outright jealousy do you think? He's driving me mad!

I think it is a combination of him reaching the horrible tantrumy toddler stage and your dd becoming more mobile - ime older siblings always "go off' the new baby once it starts crawling, etc

yes jealousy, attention seeking, big sis has gone off to school and he's left at boring old home with boring old baby sister AND he has to compete with her for Mum's attention! Try the corny tricks suggested by others .. it IS a phase and it WILL pass!