No pointing, waving, clapping at 11 months

[Zetta10]

Please help me as I feel like a total head case. My DS, 11 months, is lovely, social, happy, crawling and cruising and getting into everything. I wouldn't have a worry about him TBH except that I've been made to realize he should be doing all these gestures and he just simply won't. He does not wave, clap, or point at things. After realizing he was behind, I have been working hard in the past few weeks modeling and trying to teach him how to wave and clap etc. but he will not copy me. He will bang two blocks together (and smiles quite proudly!) if I show him so it's strange to me that he will not clap his hands. He also will not play "so big" or point to body parts etc.

On the up side, he is very socially engaged with all of us, smiles when he sees me and/or when I smile, babbles like crazy (though no real words yet), tries to get people's attention and likes to "show off," reaches to be picked up, copies some sounds back and forth, like raspberries, fake coughing, etc. He loves to "flirt" with strangers, peeking at them with a cheeky smile and then burying his face in my neck, tries to get others' attention in waiting rooms, etc., and loves other little children. He looks to me often while playing to check that I'm watching, but does not really hand/show me objects much. He eats and sleeps well and laughs when others are laughing. He seems to follow conversations and looks back and forth to the person speaking. He will carry on back and forth babbling "conversations" when he's in the mood. He follows my point when I show him things, and has done for several months. He is not too interested in books at this point and generally will not sit still for more than a few minutes to listen to a story, although he will do lift the flaps, scratchy books, etc. He will copy me when I show him how to play with a toy (like bang on drum, hammer pegs).

Sorry to post such a long and rambling description, but I just feel like I'm going crazy waiting for him to pick up on these gestures and wondering if everything is okay. I know that gestures and pointing are huge indicators for ASD, and as a have a nephew on the spectrum, I am very extra vigilant. I feel he is healthy and doing just fine over all, but I know it is late for him to not be even clapping or waving bye bye and I just don't know what to do!

Anyone have a similar child? Should I be worrying? Grateful for any advice.

Zetta10 that is great to hear! When my guy claps it seems to be for no reason. I'm so glad to hear about the progress, I really can relate to you with the worries and anxiety. U spent all yesterday pointing and waving and shaking my head. I am sure I look very strange but I will feel so much better if he does one of these things or shows me something.

How are things zetta and always? DS turns 1 in 2 weeks and, while there is still no definite pointing or clapping, he has learned 'so big' and will do it all the time. This is at the expense of the little wave he would sometimes do though so we've taken a step back on that front. I'm not sure if pointing is on the horizon though, we have just been at the in-laws for a few days and they had a bright, jingly, glittery wreath hung up. I showed it to DS a few times and after a day or so he would look at it himself from the floor and kind of stretch his arm out towards it while looking at me. Nothing even remotely resembling a pointed finger but I'm claiming that anyway!
It's been a tough few days otherwise and it hasn't helped my worrying. I think he's teething like mad but he's been in an awful mood, completely off his food and slept dreadfully which has made me mind wander as to whether he just couldn't cope with it all. Hard not to worry when my nct group WhatsApp adorable pics of their babies happily showing off their toys and wolfing down Christmas dinner.

It's so reassuring to hear others' concerns about their babies, it makes you feel like your baby is "normal" when it can feel that all other babies are way ahead!

My DS has just turned one, he has recently started clapping, exactly one week before turning one. He claps with one hand open and one fist, but it's a definite deliberate thing, he does it in response to "clap hands" and over Christmas would clap with delight whenever my dad entered the room, much to his delight!

He's also doing very similar things to what others have mentioned with the reaching out thing. He also has recently started putting his arms up if he wants something, as if he's in school! Again it's not pointing as he doesn't do it in the direction of what he wants, but I'm telling myself it's a gesture and progress for sure.

Funny how all the babies that Pp are worried about are boys! Girls are generally much quicker at this kind of thing.

I keep being told boys develop at a different speed to girls but I see boys a bit younger than ds who are waving and clapping. Over the past week DS has started refusing to be spoon fed and now feeds himself with pre-loved forks and spoons. He still waves a bit but is also obsessed with throwing things at the moment. He also turns his walker upside down to spin the wheels which I know can be a red flag for asd. I don't know about anyone else but I think mums of boys maybe worry more because conditions like ASD are more prevalent in boys. Our HV said to get in touch if he wasn't clapping by Christmas so unless anything drastic happens before his birthday next week I'll be giving her a call. I was so excited about his birthday and to be honest I'm now dreading it a bit as it seems to me to be a mark in the sand that he 'should' be doing all these things he isn't. (Fwiw I know that babies all develop differently and that individual red flags need to be considered as a wider context, it's believing it that I'm having real difficulty with!)

Haven't read thread - but ponting at objects of interest by 18 months is an important milestone - the rest not so much.

He has half his life again to get pointing.

I was very anxious about my third child as I knew he was at very high risk of a communication disorder. After staring at him and overanalysing him at about the age your son is I decided to leave it until he was 18 months and if he wasn't pointing then I would have referred.

He was fine and turns 12 soon. No communication disorder.

He sounds like he's doing wonderfully. My boy is nearly 18 months and only started waving bye bye to people in the last two months. Before that he was just randomly waving his arm. They honestly do just do things differently.

Updates - none really here. He has learned so big, and I think I'm just less worried in general. He has had a fever the last few days and that has been so worrisome the pointing seems like no big deal. I've decided he does initiate joint attention, just not in that way yet. Not to say i won't be relieved when it comes.

Pointed! He's now almost 13 months and out of nowhere he pointed to a couple pictures while we were reading yesterday. He's only done it twice, but it's reassuring.

Fantastic news always! I'm not sure if we've had a bit of pointing here at a balloon from his birthday. That's lovely to hear, is he clapping and waving too now? Hope he's better from being ill as well.

We now have waving here as well as clapping! Clapping was a week before he turned 12 months, and he waved yesterday a week before he turns 13 months weirdly! No pointing but I'm trying not to worry about that until 15 months as the HV said that's when they would check that sort of thing. He does gesture when he wants something but not necessarily in the direction of what he wants, he sort of puts his hand up as if he's in school!

Any updates zetta and always? I'm waiting for my little one to start clapping and waving.

Hi all! Any update on babies? Currently going through this with my 10, almost 11 month old....

Hey gng thru same stuff.. could u pls tell about ur child’s progress now?

@Zetta10 @Alwaysworried21 hi any updates? TIA

@Zetta10 hi, how is your son now?

Wow this thread is a blast from the past! My poor DS, I’ve worried about him since day dot. He actually started pointing to share interest bang on 13 months and his speech followed quickly, he was well exceeding his speech and communication milestones by age 2.

He’s 8 now, he’s neurodivergent.

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@Zetta10 how is your little one now?

@Zetta10 @Alwaysworried21 any updates on how your little ones came on?

@Lookingforadvice123 what signs did you notice of autism before his diagnosis?

@Mumof3bb1 he doesn’t have an autism diagnosis.

He was sensitive to loud noise age 2 and a half, he didn’t like to follow instructions at play group, would ignore staff if they were asking him to do something he didn’t want to do. In early years of school he’d get up a lot when he was meant to be seated or mess around at carpet time.

@Alwaysworried21 sorry you wrote in a previous post he was Neurodivergent which would indicate he was autistic did you mean he was neurotypical?

@Lookingforadvice123 not @Alwaysworried21

Hi @Mumof3bb1, there’s a whole umbrella of neurodivergence. DS has diagnoses for ADHD and Dyspraxia (DCD).

@Zetta10
I’ve just found this post and it sounds exactly like my 11 month old, I just wondered if you have any updates nearly 10 years later? My son is exactly as you describe yours being, and actually seems much more social than his big sister who was a bit of a serious little character, but did point and clap etc, so I don’t know what to think really but I’m starting to feel pretty worried about it all.