Feel upset at speech delay and other stuff

[SquillosMum]

Also posted on SN topic as not sure if it should be there or here, but anyway...
My DS was v ill and had emergency liver transplant last year aged 13 months. He had lots of complications and took a long time to recover, but now (aged 2) is doing quite well and has caught up physically with his peers. But we were worried about his speech and he?s just been assessed by paediatric development dr who has referred him for speech & language assessment and also wants to see him in 4 months to check other development is progressing. Dr was concerned about small head circumference, but I?m not sure what this means or what implications are for future ? anyone with any experience of this?
Am glad that we?ve been listened to this time (took 8 appointments with GPs before his liver failure was diagnosed, then was an emergency & nearly too late to save him), and am glad he will get the help he needs. Just am upset that he needs help as he was always ahead with development before he was ill and everything came crashing down. It?s the anniversary of his admission to A&E next week and I have lots of bad memories of that time and feeling v emotional about everything because of it. Sorry from long ramblings, just needed to let some of it out?

How do you feel about his speech?

I think he is behind (comparing him to lots of friends with kids same age and younger). I also think that he's behind where he would have been if he'd not been ill, which makes it harder to accept. He probably says 5 or six words fairly consistently (mostly he says "more" and "more please"). He has said others in the past, but doesn't seem to say them any more. He also has a load of words he said before he was ill which he doesn't say any more. He does do some baby signing, but not as much as he used to, and maybe not as clearly as he used to. I have no trouble understanding what he wants, but maybe that's because I am very tuned in to him, having spent all my time with him for 18 months and even now only working 2 days. But he doesn't express what he wants with speech, much more with gestures, eg if he wants you to do something he'll grab your finger and take you to it. Or if he wants you to read a story, he'll get the book and bring it to you.

Did the paediatrician give you some explanations re head circumference? Do you feel he has helped you in understanding what's going on? sorry, don't have practical advice, just hope you receive some answers soon. Your ds and you have been through such a lot and you have every right to feel emotional.

My DS1 was talking very early and could hold a conversation from about 18 months but my DS2 was much slower with his speech. At 2 he probably had similar speech to your son and it has only been the last few months that he has attempted to speak more. He is nearly 3 and still doesn't pronounce some words properly - I know that he can because if I break down the word for him he can say each part perfectly its just laziness when he tries to put the word together. Unfortunately, I allowed him to have a dummy and due to other circumstances in my life - i allowed him to keep it (and he still has it) just for an easier life and I believe this has probably hindered his speech. I don't think you need to be too worried about his speech - wait and see what the speech therapist says about it - it really isn't uncommon.

franca70 - no real info on head circumference as there was only one measurement to go on, there are centile charts for this like for weight & height but we didn't have earlier measurements to check against at the time and I think it was only done at 6 weeks anyway.

Thanks for advice, hope the s&l assessment comes soon, as I just want to be able to help him.

Don't want to piss Squillosmum off with this message, but to mumtoqusnalbie. Dummy wouldn't make any dif. My dd1 had a dummy til just before 3rd b'day and has been talking since 11mths. Could converse with at 2. Now 3 and can't shut her up if I want to!!!!

Squillo,it is very common for children who have been very ill to have speech/language problems and agian it is very common for them to catch up.
(I know this as I am a salt.)

He is still very young-loads of time to catch up.
The salt will just assess him and give you some advice.
She may not even want to see him again.

It's not a big deal-honest.

Just to second what moondog has just said.Lots of children who have been ill will be smaller than average (and so have a small head circumferance).Also they often fall behind during their illness and recovery before catching up again.
My lo spent a long time in hospital and was like this.She couldn't speak until almost 3 or walk until 2 and a half she didn't even start eating until very recently(was tube fed).
However she is now 4 and has an very good vocab and speech,despite still having a tracheostomy.We did the baby signing and after a slow start found it really helpful between 2.5-3 she started to get the hang of it,so don't give up yet.
It sounds like you've been through a terrible time and obviously you are going to be worried .It's hard not to feel your alone but there's lots of children who have had similar problems and overcome them.Hope this has made you feel a little better and good luck with the speech therapist.

Thanks so much for the positive posts, it really does help as it's easy to feel down about things.