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Original poster

Oh please please help me with dd2 (4)'s sleeping before I put my head on the desk and weep

56 replies

EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 10:43

She wakes up approx 3 times a night - I don't think she is awake tbh - and comes into our bed

I take her back, two hours later she appears again. She often says that she has had a nightmare.

I have tried:
a) letting her sleep in our bed (she would love to do this every night but I don't WANT her in my bed every night)
b) putting her straight back to bed (cries) and laying with her (knackering for me)
c) getting very cross and sending her away to settle herself back to sleep (HATE this)
d) dh, against my advice, even tried a sticker chart (no effect at all except to upset her in the morning when she doesn't get a sticker)
e) putting a clock/nightlight in her room so she knows wht time to get up (she ignores them)

I don't want to upset her if she is really strugglign with a nightmare BUT this disturbed sleep is really killing me.

Any help or sympathy gratefully received.

OP posts:
CountessDracula · 07/02/2007 11:19

you should try the girly swot approach too

Original poster
EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 11:19

oh am too tired to face it atm

am sure it would help though

OP posts:
Original poster
EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 11:19

yes will do

she responds to girly swot

OP posts:
HuwEdwards · 07/02/2007 11:22

I found the problem of bribery with a toy, was that it was too long before she would see the reward - I felt I needed something that I could do each day - and buying toys on a daily basis wasn't going to happen AND would piss DD1 off.

So I withdrew treats. It broke my heart to do it, but I gave DD1 some chocolate for staying in her bed and gave none to DD2.

She was most unhappy.

She stayed in her bed the next night.

Oh yes we had frequent lapses, but the chocolate continued to win her round.

Slowly but surely, I reduced and stopped the choc

Good luck I had this for TWO years and was zombie-like - so you have my heartfelt sympathy.

oliveoil · 07/02/2007 11:23

oh I just know I will have this with dd2, she is dreadful sometimes and only 2.6yrs. Once she is out of that cot , I am dreading it

dd1 is and always has been fab so I have no idea on tips

tbh if dd2 wants to come in our bed she does, I will do anything for sleep at 3am

although she has been in her cot for 5 nights now....

Original poster
EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 11:24

I love her so mcuh she is so helpful and kind and warm and cuddly

cannot bear to upset her

I am pathetic arent I fgs tell me to pull myuself together

OP posts:
CountessDracula · 07/02/2007 11:25

Enid don't be so WET

Do you want to sleep or not ffs???

It is you who is suffering here remind yourself

meowmix · 07/02/2007 11:25

DS (3) went through a stage of this and we took him out and let him buy a load of tat (ie 4 foot high plastic sunflower that he liked) for his bedroom so he made it his. Worked for a few weeks.

Now he's invented a charming character called the Bing Bong Witch who apparently comes and wakes him up and scares him out of his room, so last night I let him have a stone penguin garden ornament DH gave me as an anniversary present (I know - spoilt aren't I) as a Guard Penguin. He worked miracles.

SO the point - could you try something like that? letting her decide what might help her sleep?

Original poster
EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 11:26

I know

but I am soppy with my kids which is why dd1 is a control freak and dd2 probably a right madam. dd3 walks all over me already and she's only 9 months.

ok.

will try to get tough

sob

OP posts:
foxinsocks · 07/02/2007 11:27

yes, that's a good point. Dd has a dragon that protects her in the night .

MegaLegs · 07/02/2007 11:27

DS1 was like this. He is now 5 and has been sleeping through for about 6 months. He was restless, shouting, not really waking properly but wandering around, often coming into us.

We found reward schemes and bribery didin't work as it made him more anxious, and therefor emore resteless. he didn't know he was doind it and would get very upset if we spoke a bout it next day.

He was waking because he needed to wee but, in his deep sleepy state it was stressing him out and making him shout and sleep walk. HV advised no milky drinks and no juice after 4.00 and it does seem to have worked.

I used to quietly guide him to the loo if he was up and he'd do these masive power wees!

Original poster
EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 11:28

DS1 was like this. He is now 5 and has been sleeping through for about 6 months. He was restless, shouting, not really waking properly but wandering around, often coming into us.

We found reward schemes and bribery didin't work as it made him more anxious, and therefor emore resteless. he didn't know he was doind it and would get very upset if we spoke a bout it next day.

that sounds just like her

will try and get her to wee (actually she doesnt ever wee in the night now I think about it)

OP posts:
CountessDracula · 07/02/2007 11:28

DD has a big tiger and I tell her that he is babysitting and put him on the end of the bed

CountessDracula · 07/02/2007 11:29

enid you have a ds???

oliveoil · 07/02/2007 11:29

Why doesn't dd1 want to move rooms so dd2 and 3 can share?

Can you bribe her with a room makeover with lots of pink stuff?

I am in the Big Softie Club too Enid and always go for the easy option

MegaLegs · 07/02/2007 11:32

Woah - I though I'd turned into Enid then

Original poster
EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 11:32

no cd meant to put that bit in quotes!

OP posts:
MegaLegs · 07/02/2007 11:32

thought

Original poster
EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 11:33

oh dd1 doesnt want to move as she absolutely loves her bedroom - she chose all the decor for it, it was built for her, then 6 months later I got bloody pg with dd3

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oliveoil · 07/02/2007 11:35

oh, understandable then

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Original poster
EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 11:35

I thnk the only way we'd get her to move is if we bought her a pony

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CountessDracula · 07/02/2007 11:36

We are rather soppy too but dd is such a minx that we have to get tough occasionally!

Two nights a week I don't mind her in our bed for half the night, but not every night!

CountessDracula · 07/02/2007 11:36

Well there you go

Get down that pony shop NOW

oliveoil · 07/02/2007 11:37

yes I don't mind the odd night

and I actually love her fat little cuddly body next to me all sweet smelling and gorgeous

Original poster
EnidLloydFoxe · 07/02/2007 11:37

I would be MORE than happy to do the odd night

in fact when dh was away they both came in for the night it was luverly

OP posts: