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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

help - monsters are in our house!

25 replies

nulnulcat · 01/02/2007 20:15

dd just turned 3 has suddenly become obsessed with monsters and not nice fluffy ones but big scary ones! havent a clue where she has got the idea from as we are really careful what she sees on the tv.

the past couple of weeks we have been woken up every night with tears and last night she was absolutely hysterical and trying to get out of her bed coz the monster was going to get her.

we have tried telling her there is no such thing as scary monsters but she wont believe us, we tried telling her we wouldnt let monsters in the house but she says they are naughty monsters and wont listen to mummy, we have even pretended to throw the monsters out of the door.

tonight she has refused again to go to bed in her bed at the moment she is asleep on the sofa and i know if i move her and she wakes up we will get the screaming again!

she does have a very vivid imagination but this is getting beyond a joke now and i need some sleep!

any ideas of what to do next would be gratefully received!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

TheArmadillo · 01/02/2007 20:20

HAve she got a teddy or other soft toy that she sleeps with? Can you get/make up a story where this toy is a fantastic monster beater who never gets defeated? Who can chuck them out the house or put them in a box or something similar?

My parents did a similar thing with a teddy and witches when I was little. I was still scared of the witches, but believed they couldn't get me as long as the teddy was there.

ejt1764 · 01/02/2007 20:20

DS is 4 1/2 and has had the monsters dreams from quite a young age ...

we take a deep breath in (breathe in nice things), then we BLOOOOW the monsters away ...

ds has taken to telling me that he's done this in his dreams and he finds it really funny that it works

A liberal dose of mammy magic around the door - and reminder that the monsters are so scared of mammy that they don't dare come anywhere near also helps ...

good luck!

ejt

squidette · 01/02/2007 20:29

we have also had monsters in our house, pesky things. I remember watching a programme about someone making an elaborate 'monster spray' from a plant spray and covering it in tin foil etc as part of a plan to rid the bedroom of the things. I thought it was quite a bright idea. For about 3 seconds....! Agreeing that there are monsters (and making dramatic attempts to rid the house of them!) was going to be just a weeeny bit unsettling for my littlest one.

For some children though, it DOES work well. I think its probably better to listen to how upset and scared your daughter is and tell her that you understand that she is feeling frightened and ask her what you could do to help her. You could even empathise with her 'version' of what monsters dont like to listen to.... Humour, may help too. Or letting her know something that you are fearful of too - maybe that you are not particularly keen on slugs or heights (whatever it is) can make fear less scary if you are not the only one to be frightened.

Sorry that you are not getting much sleep though - but just validating feelings has the potential to dramatically change the presence of the monsters IME. We often play the 'purple frog' game. Just because mummy thinks she is a purple frog doesnt mean she is one - the classic Feelings are not Facts, but ALL feelings are important to be listened to.

Cloudhopper · 01/02/2007 20:34

Our monsters were exorcised with fairy dust (glitter) and an elaborate ceremony which dd seemed to enjoy.

Any time it seemed like the monsters were making an appearance again, out came the glitter/fairy dust.

Worth a try although all children are different!

Original poster

nulnulcat · 01/02/2007 20:44

we spent last friday gluing and painting a huge collage that was going to keep the monsters away apparently it didnt scare the monster! we are leaving lights on all over the house at night as she seems to be worse in the dark, we tried the teddy and doll thing but she was scared the monsters were going to get her favourite toys!

we have had to phone grandparents at unearthly hours of morning to reassure her everyone is ok

we thought we would take her shopping on saturday and let her choose a new teddy or something that would be her monster scarer!

thanks for the messages it is a relief to find out other children do this aswell!

dp thought letting her watch monsters inc might help so she would think monsters were friendly but im not so sure and worry it might be a bit to old for her i have never seen it so i dont really know

OP posts:

LowFatMilkshake · 01/02/2007 20:50

My DD is nearly 3.5 and has also just started to be aware of monsters (does your DD watch Backyardigans?)

We shout "Go away Monster - leave me alone" and it seems to work for now. We occasionally have scary dinosuars (thank you peppa pig) as well, but DD likes these and goes to 'play' with them!

Perhaps I should tell her to get the dinosaurs to chase the onsters off!

LowFatMilkshake · 01/02/2007 20:52

Oh and re Monsters Inc. ny DD has been watching it since age 2 and for about 63 months we had to watch it daily - sometimes twice. As a result we have a large cuddly Mike and Sully, and a dolly of Boo that talks. They 'guard' the cupboard door!

LowFatMilkshake · 01/02/2007 20:54

me again

63 months!! [shock}

I meant to type 3-6 months, fingers faster than brain!

Fillyjonk · 01/02/2007 20:54

ah yes, ds has this

we have a "go away monster song"

I have to sing it while we go up the stairs

fecking usborne book of monster things to make and do

Pruni · 01/02/2007 20:56

Message withdrawn

Original poster

nulnulcat · 01/02/2007 20:58

and i could have killed someone in the local shopping centre today having a happy shopping session no tantrums holding hands walking nicely - a rarity i usually avoid shopping trips with her in tow! then there was a great big bloody pink monster walking round the centre! cue mass hysterics!

OP posts:

edam · 01/02/2007 21:00

Agree about accepting that there are monsters but making a big thing out of mummy shooing them away. I do 'Mummy doesn't allow monsters in the house' and shoo them down the stairs. The monsters are scared of me!

Original poster

nulnulcat · 01/02/2007 21:03

thanks for all the advice, i will make a big deal about throwing monsters out of the door / window if she wakes up! fingers crossed they stay outside tonight

OP posts:

ejt1764 · 02/02/2007 17:58

How did you get on nulnulcat?

ejt

Scootergirl · 02/02/2007 18:06

I read in a book by a pyscologist (sp??) that when his son was hallucinating about killer blobs in his room (?) his wife got one of those fishing nets you get at the seaside and "caught" them and chucked them out of the window.
Or what about superhero pjs or some kind of scary mask for one of her teddies or even her so the monster is scared of HER? Not sure how that would work with sleeping though - can you tell I don't get much either?

Madora · 02/02/2007 18:19

You must acknowledge that the monster is there and deal with it. And be very matter of fact about it. I usually show them (monsters) the front door and tell my child that the dog will not let the monster back in. right, that's dealt with, now back to bed quietly so we don't wake the others...

Original poster

nulnulcat · 02/02/2007 19:38

monsters returned at 3am! she is now in bed after helping me to hoover the monsters all up! heres hoping that has worked!

OP posts:

Smee · 03/02/2007 14:24

DS 2.5 into monsters too - we've invented an imaginary protector - a dragon called Hector, who's always around, is DS's mate and laughs at any monsters who try to scare him and together they chase them away. Since we did that no more trouble, fingers crossed..

Tortington · 03/02/2007 14:51

from being small i told my children that i was a witch - a real one ( i'm plainly not!) a good witch - witchyness was passed from mother to daughter and every thursday ( i had regular meeting!) i went to my covern.

this came in handy for lots of things, the ultimate belief in something magical ala father xsmas and monsters - i had the POWWWEEERRRRR to make everything better. a spell book ( most impressive looking book on shelf was a poetry book really) a spell, some insence or glitter may do the trick?

this helped muchly when my daughter was being bullied as a matter of fact. i did a @confidence@ spell. ( some shit i made up) but full of confidence my dd went to school and stod up to bully who was so impressed/scared they became good friends ( always the way!)

so if the hoovering doesn't work - maybe try this? telling her that as your daughter she has magic too but she can't actually do magic stuff until she is 14 ( by which time she will know your ful of shit! mine does) and that the magiv inside her along with your spell if you concentrate hard will cast a protection spell

Pitchounette · 03/02/2007 15:50

Message withdrawn

Pitchounette · 03/02/2007 15:55

Message withdrawn

Madora · 03/02/2007 19:26

Trouble is - perception is reality!

Weatherwax · 03/02/2007 20:43

I remember a thread a while ago where someone told their DC that there were no monsters in the house - they couldn't afford them. They cost too much. DD1 sitting here reading this does not remember that she believed this for a time. I do tell her lots that things cost too much!

Original poster

nulnulcat · 04/02/2007 20:35

we seem to have solved the monster problem, we bought her that big blue thing from monsters inc and it eats all the monsters that come in the house she has not let it go at night but apart from waking up a couple of times (snotty cold) managed to settle her back down again really quickly and with no tears!

next question how do i stop her terrorising our poor old cat!!!!!!!

OP posts:

Madora · 05/02/2007 20:36

well done!

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