Advice please!

[Peachy123]

I have a dd who is almost 4. Shes been toilet trainned now since she was 2, and wees with no problem- but for as long as i can remember, she has problems with her number 2s- she wont do them, and if she needs to go she will go and hide somewhere and squeeze her buttocks to keep the poo inside- making the problem worse as it makes her constipated. shes really good at eating and drinking juice/water, she eats fruit and foliage but it doesnt seem to make a difference.... i get so stressed with it sometimes, and try to act unbothered by the copious amounts of knickers she will go through in a day sometimes from little accidents.... i try to sit with her on the loo and read her stories and treat her to things when she does eventually go, but it leaves me in a catch 22 situation as she now thinks everytime she does a poo she should have a treat!!! From not pooing it really hurts her when eventually nature does take over, and it kills me to listen to her cry in pain through straining.... and no recently she tries to tell me that the poo wont come out cos hes busy playing with his friends!! Im at my wits end, its so stressful as I hate the whole pain situation.... but she wont listen to reasoning, and i dont want to keep giving her herbal laxatives of a night when shes so little......

This sounds very hard for you both. I have no experience in this area. Does the treats work? If they do I would continue until she feels confident. Perhaps start with every time and reduce it down to morning and afternoon right through to days and weeks where she goes when she needs to rather than want.

HTH a little

even incentives dont always work- she just argues that "he wont come out"

anyone else got any wisdom here?

Peachy123, I have been through this with my ds1 since he was 2ish, now almost 7. We were given lactulose from dr which led to more accidents.

Eventually last year we were referred to the hospital and saw a fab dr who prescribed Movicol, which worked, and now a year later ds1 is going every three to four days. He was only going once a week or at the worst point once a month.

You have to increase water intake and lots of fibre rich foods. There is a Tropicana Fibre juice which contains as much fibre as seven apples which works.

Money motivated my son so he got 50p for a poo, and was allowed to spend the money on anything he wanted.

You have my sympathy, it is tough, you don;t want your child to be the one that smells of poo (from accidents) and to be teased.

GO and see the doctor and be tough, you don't lactulose or senna (we were at one point we having to give 15 spoons of senna and a5 of lactulose to get a poo!!!)

You can CAT me if you want any further advice, you are not alone its just people don't talk about it!

We had a similar problem with my DD although she was just under 3. I invented the toilet fairy and every time she did a poo in the toilet the fairy would leave her a treat, but she would hide it somewhere in the lounge. It really encouraged her to go on the loo because she found it great fun looking for the treat. It was only ever somehing small just one smartie or an opal fruit or something, I think the main thing she enjoyed was the hunt for it. To instigate this the toilet fairy sent her a grown up letter in the post explaining that she was very important and grown up having the toilet fairy as a friend, and only a few little girls get her help etc etc. I used this for some time and it worked. When the time come to wean her off this she got another letter saying another little girl needed her help and she wouldnt be back, although she left her one last special gift to say what a really good girl she had been etc.( a dvd) I know your DD is a little older but it might be worth a try??
Good luck XX

Just wanted to say that Movicol is brilliant. We have had problems with our dd and encopresis. Basically, she never toilet trained due to constipation and the pain that goes with it. We were unaware that she was constipated and thought she had diarrhoea as the looser stuff leaked around. The whole situation messed up her bowel and bowel habits. She was put on Movicol long term and now at nearly 7 we are using it less and less as she is now more or less going under her own steam. We still have to go back to it when she has a bit of a setback but we now feel that we are getting there.