Just before Christmas, dh & I arranged a lunch at a local pub/playcentre with another couple. I've known this particular friend since we were teenagers, and now we're both married with children - I have a 6 year old ds, and she has a ds (nearly 8) and a dd (10 yrs old). I've been to this place for lunch with my playgroup friends several times before, as it has great kids' facilities (a playground, video/games room, playstation room, etc) and it gives us a chance to sit down and have a nice meal/chat while the kids play.
Anyway, she is very particular about her children - I can't think of a better way to say it, except that she's had them involved in various extra-curricular activities since they were little and now she's just pulled them out of their school and has put them into separate, more expensive schools. Her whole life seems to be about their education, their achievements, their behaviour, etc etc. I think it's great that she wants them to be the best that they can be, but they don't seem like most other children their age - they seem more reserved and a bit socially 'different' from their peers, if that makes sense.
While we were sitting at the table, we ordered our meals and then ds asked me if he could go outside to play. I said 'yes' as I assumed that my friend would also let hers do the same thing until our meals arrived. She made them both sit there at the table and not move, while ds went off and played in the play area with a bunch of other children. I could tell she didn't think this was 'right' and asked me whether I thought it was ok for him to go outside and play while we were waiting for our lunch. I said it was fine, as we'd been there before with other friends and the kids always tend to go and play while we're waiting for the food. In fact, the only time I've seen my other friends' kids sit down at the table is while they're eating, and then they go off to play again! I thought this was quite normal behaviour..
Anyway I spoke to her today and she told me that when we'd gone to lunch that day, she thought that ds had been 'all over the place' (referring to him going outside to play and then coming back inside when his lunch was ready), and that he should 'focus' more (???). In other words, sit at the table and not think about going outside to play perhaps...? I'm a bit annoyed about her comment, because ds was well-behaved the whole time we were there - he just didn't sit at the table the whole time like she thought he should. Personally I think it's quite normal for a 6 year old boy to want to go outside when there's a playground and other interesting things there. Not only that, her son is almost two years older than mine and her daughter is four years older, so obviously they would find it easier to sit there doing nothing, than my son would. As long as he's not misbehaving, I didn't think I'd done anything wrong by letting him go outside to play. What do others think? I feel a bit insulted, as I don't comment on anything she does with her children and I feel that my son was just being normal.