Contrary b****y Mary

[batey]

Anyone any ideas about my just 2 y/o dd. She's driving me nuts!! Every morning it's the same story with her clothes, in that I get out a choice of suitable clothes for her to choose from. And nothing will do, off she goes to get her fairy outfit/swimming costume etc. Then if I persist in sensible clothes she does her nut! This morning she cried so much she made herself sick! And then when she realised we (Me and the bis sis) were going anyway off she went to get the clothes she was refusing!
I'm not so uptight that I wont let her go out looking mad. She frequently has her cozzy on under her clothes and went to the park in her mermaid outfit last week, but there are times/weather when she needs the right clothes (and wearing her cozzy means we have to take everything off if she needs a nappy change).
Dh isn't an option as he's away for 4 1/2 weeks, maybe she's missing him (it's been 10 days so far). Anyway, anyone any gems of wisdom?!

My 4 y/o dd is exactly the same.She goes mad at having to wear her school uniform because she wants to wear her fairy dress/Barbie party dress/anything pink. I know at her age she's probably easier to bargain with but striking up a deal with her seems to work..... If you wear this for me, as soon as we come home you can wear your fairy dress/Barbie party dress/anything pink until bath time. A few weeks of that and the nagging, crying and screaming fits aren't nearly as bad!

My DD is like this, too, although can be reasoned with now she is older. Have you tried hiding the outfits she wants to wear? You'll likely get the same tears etc but she'll realise eventually that there's no point in fighting for something that isn't there. Good luck!

Aah yes, we have it all day every day! My 3.5 yr DD is rather "stroppy" as we call it. Clothes, shoes, hats, bags anything and everything. I went to the boot sale today and came home with 3 beautiful very girly dresses by Little Darlings (a real bargain) and she said "no, don't like them". I assure you she will be wearing them!

If I suggest anything from her wardrobe, she won't wear it, perhaps I'll start suggesting things I don't want her to wear! Aargh, my sympathies. R

Batey, I sympathise totally. My dd (2.5) has lived almost constantly in her brother's old Thomas sweatshirt for the last 3 months. My brother is getting married on Saturday, and she has a lovely cream silk dress to wear - she seems to like it, but I'm just praying that she doesn't insist on wearing Thomas on top!

BTW, she drove me nuts yesterday (I ended up in tears after her bedtime). Then I picked up my e-mail and read the latest development bulletin from Mumsnet, about behaviour at 2.5 yrs. It described dd to the tee! Really helped me get it all back in perspective and remember that it will pass....eventually.

Yes, my sympathies - I have just dressed my 2+3month year old dd (is this a girl thing, btw?) and it was a screaming struggle to get her into the clothes she had wanted to wear 5 omns before. And as for the shoes .... she wants to go everywhere in her slippers which light up when she walks (last time I buy those!!). So we had another fight about getting the black shoes on for her to go to the childminder this morning. AAArgh! And it's not just clothes - she wont eat anything I put in front of her (demands ice lollies for breakfast, lunch and tea) and when she does eat its just fish fingers and peas, and she could whine for Scotland! And the thing is most of the time she is adorable and I love her to bits and we have great fun, but these couple of things are really driving me insane!!

Dont get me started on mealtimes! She recently aquired 2 new cutlery sets for her birthday and HAS to have all of them on the table to mess about with, and then gets down to get some more half way through! Then at about the same time, strips off and decides she needs a "blankie", gets one of those, and FINALY may dain to eat somthing!!! By which time we've all finished.
Yesterday, at then blankie/might eat might not stage she spat her food at me. I did get cross and made her leave the table, as did myself and big dd as we'd finished hrs ago, let her settle a bit, then put food in bowl. And she ate the whole lot sat on a cushion watchind big dd be a ballerina!!! I give up!

susanmt, just to reassure you, if my ds is anything to go by then it is not just a girl thing. He has a particular aversion to anything new or different to what he wore the day before. I do an awful lot of deep breathing every morning!

Oh great!! So I have all this to look forward to with ds (currently 4 months) in about 2 yrs time!!)

I feel for you completely! My daughter was exactly the same at this age (now 4)particularly after the arrival of little brother. It would start on a morning with "I want jam on my toast", "I don't want jam I want marmalade!!" and so on. Looking back I don't know how I survived. Things are better now altho' mornings are sometimes the same when getting dressed and like yourself I often allow her to wear what she wants but like you say it's not always possible.

I know this probably isn't very helpful right now but it is a phase and all part of her trying to be assertive and have control. I found the more I allowed my daughter to make some of her own decisions the more amenable she became. She very probably is missing her Daddy and you just have to weather the storm. Good luck!

We've just had a screaming performance because DD refused to wear one of her lovely new dresses. I put it on her, she crumpled on the floor, crying, screaming runny nose. We went down stairs, 30 minutes have now gone by and I just said "you look beautiful in that dress" and can you believe she said "I'm happy with it on". C'est la vie! R