So tonight DS has spat and hit me... And just been generally horrid...

[LolaCrapola]

His behaviour has deteriorated over the last few months .. We did a parenting course recently through Action for children - we are trying to implement what the techniques they have taught us but he seems to be getting worse. He is currently shut in his room - which he has trashed - and he seems to think he can say sorry and get away with it. Tonight he has deliberately goaded us...he is six years old...I am calm but reaching the end of my tether....I originally told Action for children that I didn't think he had anything that required a diagnosis but as time goes on I am beginning to think he may had Oppositional Defiance Disorder.

Does anyone have any experience/knowledge of this?

Can anyone offer me some helpful advice... Please.

I'm afraid I don't have specific knowledge just some indirect experience from a friend who went through this, but I saw your thread and didn't want it to go unanswered.

I was wondering how is his behaviour in school? And does he have siblings that you have to look out for as well?

Thanks for replying Pippistrelle- I wonder if this isn't the best plac to put it?m

Generally DS is good in school however when he has been naughty the Head teacher has expressed surprise at his lack of remorse and his defiance.

When you say he's been naughty in school, what has he done?

Why was he spitting and hitting you today?

And why did you decide to do a parenting course, initially?

Sorry, so many questions!

My DS behaved in a similar way at that age, so I may be able to help. Or maybe not, as all DC are different!

Maybe you need to stop holding it together and shout (apologies if you have already but you seem very together). Sometimes they need to see how their behaviour effects others. Also don't replace anything in his bedroom, don't help him clean it up and hold him responsible for his actions.

I'm not sure about the shouting (I've done a lot of that over the years!) and I was advised one good hard smack might help, both by GP and grandparents but agree don't replace anything in his room.

If he's anything like my 6yo he won't care less if his room was a mess or not. Instead of tidying it away tho I'd put any books toys dvd whatever he's trashed into bags and put them in the garage or shed so he's without them and the room is tidier

' we are trying to implement what the techniques they have taught us but he seems to be getting worse'

It will do for a few months, until he realises that you are being consistent and that raging and destroying things doesn't change the outcome.
Remember to reinforce the good behaviour as well as sanctioning the bad, it's going to be rough for a while, but try and hang in there.