toddler hits baby if I breastfeed

[Queazy]

I've posted a similar thread about dd being jealous of new brother when he came home. She whacks him on the head if I breastfeed and it's driving me mad. Even if others are there to play with, she has new toys right next to her, or I put her favourite programme on TV, lavish her with attention etc. I keep saying 'no I can't let you hurt X' but I can't repeatedly unlatch. He only feeds for 7 mins! It's driving me mad.

Sadly I know someone whose child was allowed to get away with this and is now 'top dog'
The mum allows this dc1 is better than dc2 behaviour to continue and often makes excuses for the poor behaviour of dc1.
I'm not suggesting yours will come to this BUT it just shows how things can pan out.
I think being firm is the way forward.

Oh sure, I agree buying stuff probably doesn't help. I don't agree with the previous poster that being firm is the answer - giving her as much love as possible is the answer in order to avoid her feeling more pushed out but I think the OP feels this too.

It's so, so common. I think it's rare for an older child not to feel jealous of a new sibling being born.

I do agree that being firm has to happen, if only to protect the baby, but it's just very important as everyone on this thread seem to be saying to keep in mind how your DD is feeling (which it's clear you're aware of) and that she's just so young herself.

Foxsox, I think the idea of a little 2.5 year old becoming 'top dog' is quite a negative one for the poor OP... these things do happen all the time and it's not ongoing & persistent 'poor behaviour', it's just the ordinary transition from being the only object of her mum's affection to having a sibling. It will pass!

I used to mention, fairly frequently, in the hearing of the 2 year old, how boring small babies are, and how 2 year olds who can talk and play etc are so much more fun and interesting. I'd moan about being interrupted by the baby, and big up the 2 year old, exchange knowing glances with him when baby was grizzling. I also made a point of mixing with other people with 2 or more DC, so that 2 year old could see that it wasn't him being singled out.
Good luck to you, early days of two DC can be quite trying!

My dd has now started trying to bounce her brother out of his bouncer, even leaving my side while baking to do so. I know she's tiny and upset, but today I put her in her cot to calm down. Or actually, for me to calm down. She's not acting with evil intent but I realised I'm only human and I was getting bloody angry. It's so hard to ensure I protect him while not 'hurting' her feelings!!!!! Argh! Saga continues.... This too shall pass.... !!!!

I would explain that you're going to feed him and that she will not hit/hurt him and that if she did she would be put in her room or wherever.Be very firm from the get go. A very strong "No!" Good luck. Like all things good and bad, this will pass.