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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

did your dc get a nintendo ds for christmas? has it been a source of joy and amusement or a pita?

24 replies

hatwoman · 30/12/2006 20:40

dh and I are beginning to think it was a duff decision. dd1 has been sulky and rotten and a right royal pita

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ScummyMummy · 30/12/2006 20:41

Limit time on it or they become vile. In moderation it is fab long term tho.

Original poster

hatwoman · 30/12/2006 20:44

we have limited the time on it. what limitation do you have? I'm not sure what's reasonable? she doesn;t seem to get that the net worth of this bloody thing is negative. she gets more misery from not playing it than pleasure from playing it. god I want to throw it in the bin.

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2007nervesleft · 30/12/2006 20:44

Bit of both. She needs quite a bit of help reading what the dogs need or what challenges ariel the mermaid has been set.

Original poster

hatwoman · 30/12/2006 20:46

third night on a row we have had hysterics. we are mean. we are hateful.

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idontlikecrusts · 30/12/2006 20:47

Mine got a Gameboy but was already spending waaaay too much time on the CBeebies site imo.

I've talked this over with a few people as was at a loss as to what to do.

I still don't have the answer but at the moment I am trying the let him bore himself of it. Does that not work then scummymummy? Shit.

No qualms about limiting time if this might be best course of action but I figure that after a school day of 8.30 until 4.30 age 5 then it's up to him how he relaxes?

ScummyMummy · 30/12/2006 20:51

Is she finding the games hard? if so, can you or your partner play with her? I think it can take a while for them to get the hang of it which can be frustrating.

I think between 30-60 mins is about right, depending on the kid and the circs. I'd go for the lower time if it's a lovely day with lots of other good activities on offer but it's nice for them to get into it if it's a horrid rainy day or they're travelling.

If she's being a real pain once her daily time is up I'd suggest a take 5 mins off tomorrows time for every whinge about wanting to play rule.

Original poster

hatwoman · 30/12/2006 21:02

she's not finding it hard no. her pretty appaling behaviour is not even, tbh, on the face of it connected. but it's the worst behaviour we've seen and in the middle of her hysterics comes the accusations of the great injustices done to her connected to the d sodding s. to be fair, last night, at fils, I later defending her as I thought the injustice was indeed unjust - people passing it round and asking grown-ups for a go, and not asking her - when it is, in fact her's. I did feel the unfairness of that. but there's been no similar justification for her overall stroppiness and bad behaviour tonight.

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annh · 30/12/2006 21:03

Both ds's got a DS Lite for Christmas and are loving it! However, they are 8 and 5 and therefore well capable of reading the instructions. DS1 also had a Gameboy before so we kind of went through the tantrummy stage with that. Now, they accept that the DS is not going to disappear overnight and tbh they have so many other things to play with from Christmas they haven't really overdosed. I think if children can't read the instructions (as with any activity or game) it makes things much more difficult.

idontlikecrusts · 30/12/2006 21:04

ds 5 gets stroppy after anything gadget-like whether it be time on PC or time on Gameboy.

That's why I am concerned about it because although it is HIS free time it cannot be very relaxing for him.

sigh...

ScummyMummy · 30/12/2006 21:14

Can you sit her down for a quiet chat tomorrow and tell her that you love her loads and thought a ds would be a great gift for her but you are finding her behaviour is pissing you off bigtime, you think the cause is the ds and it will be confiscated unless she can show you that she can behave in her usual fab way? Without using those exact words, obviously. Maybe if she realises how annoyed you are she will change her behaviour. I think kids (and adults) often get a bit "above themselves" (as my mum might have said) at this time of year so it may just be general Xmas grumps rather than the ds per se...

WideWebWitch · 30/12/2006 21:19

How old's she hat? This all sounds v familiar except wrt PS2 in our case with ds, although he can control it now at 9yo and it's seriously limited, his time on it. But we have sometimes had bad behaviour as a result, partly due to frustration at his not being able to do it or at losing or something like that.

Original poster

hatwoman · 30/12/2006 21:20

I think you could be right about general christmas grumpiness. we definitely need a system - and a talk when she's in a good mood is also a good idea. I do feel sorry for her as she's getting herself into such a state. it's not frustration with it - she's taken to it like a duck to water, it's the obsessiveness of it all. (DH says it's like crack) I'm sure it'll all come out in teh wash. there was a post on here earlier that made me go cold. it described a christmas visit involving a 9 year old who was rude a sulky because he hadn;t been allowed to take his ds. god I hope we can get over this!

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Original poster

hatwoman · 30/12/2006 21:21

she's 6. right now she's lying in bed saying that she doesn;t like herself.

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ScummyMummy · 30/12/2006 21:22

You will, hat. I have total confidence that you will adapt to being a ds owning household. Honestly.

ScummyMummy · 30/12/2006 21:23

Tell her that YOU love her and it's bedtime.

WideWebWitch · 30/12/2006 21:42

You will get over it. Maybe she's also overwhelmed at how wonderful it is and wants you to take some control and be the adult etc etc because the amount she likes it is an unknown feeling to her. Plus maybe she hates losing. We had a lot of this at 6 with PS2, it was ok in the end. But firm rules about when it was and wasnt' allowed helped, definitely. It is like crack I think. (Like mumsnet, ds used to say "but YOU'RE allowed mumsnet!")

roisin · 30/12/2006 21:50

the ds lite for christmas was mine - and no-one is limiting my time on it

DS2 got a gameboy, but has not played with it much at all yet - far too engrossed in other things.

poinsettydog · 30/12/2006 22:46

Got it for her birthday. Yes, she is a zombie. But I think this is a phase she has to go through. Think it will do no harm. She is a bloody zombie.

Kbear · 30/12/2006 22:58

DD loving hers. She's got Nintendogs and it's driving us insane "Lucky, Luckeeee". She came in our room this morning talking the thing and DH had been on nights and had just got to sleep. He threatened to chuck it out the window!

2007nervesleft · 30/12/2006 23:00

Oh yes Kbear, if I hear Ruby, Roooby, Rhuubbby, one more time I shall scream.

LucyLemon · 30/12/2006 23:51

I had something similar when I got my dd, aged 6, a gameboy advance for her birthday.
She didn't want to do anything else but play the damn thing and it was a real struggle to get her back into her reading. She was grumpy and distant and I really started to regret buying it for her.

Thankfully it was just a phase and after a couple of weeks she was back to herself again. I didn't even really do anything about it....just quietly observed for a while.
Try not to make it too much of an issue and let her get on with it for a bit. Just don't start worrying yet!

Original poster

hatwoman · 31/12/2006 11:34

thanks everyone. seems it's a normal phase. she's being an angel this morning and hasn;t asked to play on it once. i hope we don;t have bed-time meltdown coz we're going to be at a friend's house tonight.

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fullmoonfiend · 31/12/2006 11:44

both mine got one (cheap from USA in caser you think we're minted ) and it has ben very quiet this christmas
we have limit play time though, as we forgot the first day and at 10.30 at night we realised they were still gaming. Now ds1 has enough of a geek gene already without us encouraging him to stay up all night gaming....

mumeeee · 31/12/2006 17:05

DD3 got one last christmas when she was 13 her coison aged 8 also had one. They had a grat time playing with them together as they can link up without a cable and they interact with each other.
This Christmas 2 more of her coisons had Nintendo DS Lites which are simular to the origanal just a bit smaller and lighter. Well at our famikly Christmas party all 4 of them were siting on the sofa playing with these things and laughing and chatting about them. One of them had the brain game and they were all able to join in playing on their own Nintendos.
The 7 year old needed a bit of help and I personnoly would not recomend them to under 7's.
I also reccomend limiting the time on it. 30 to 60 minutes a day is ample for younger children.

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