How do you recognise ADHD?

[Nic04]

Hi everyone, I apologise if this has been covered before but I'm just wondering if anyone knows what the main signs of ADHD are, and when they're likely to appear. I think I may just be being paranoid at the moment, but I spoke to another mum at preschool this morning who's had all kinds of problems with her 11 yr old son because he has ADHD. My ds is nearly four and is very active, but I'm never sure whether it's 'normal' or whether I need to look into it more.

On the good side - he sleeps very well (between 11 - 12 hours at night), that's with no sleep during the day. So normally he tends to go from about 8.30pm until 7.30am, sometimes later if he's really tired. He can concentrate for fairly long periods if he's interested in something, such as playing with a favourite toy or watching a tv programme or movie that he likes. He can listen quite well and responds to instructions most of the time, that kind of thing.

On the other side, he is very boisterous and impulsive. When he sits on a chair he seems to fidget the whole time, & often he will just run around the room and then throw himself onto the couch, for no apparent reason. He has a fairly short attention span at times and tends to move from one thing to another, and he has trouble standing or sitting still - he seems to want to be moving the whole time. And at preschool this morning, the teacher asked him to do something, and he just walked off and starting playing. She said his name several times, and he either just ignored her or didn't hear her - I'm not sure which. In the end I had to go and get him and insist that he do what she was saying. While he's quite affectionate and plays well with other kids a lot of the time, he can also be quite boisterous with them and this concerns me a little bit. I spoke to his preschool teacher a couple of weeks ago and she just told me that he was "very active", but that she thinks he'll be ok when it comes time to go to school. I am just really not sure whether he has a problem or not, or who I can go to if I want to find out. Any input would be appreciated.

All sounds fairly normal to me. The ADHD kids I know are beyond all possibility of being called normal. It's an incredibly hard condition to deal with- personally I think a lot of mums with children with ADHD have a much tougher time than me (with a 5 year old non-verbal autistic son).

Most (all?) the children I know with ADHD are incredibly destructive- they just destroy everything, cut things, draw on walls, and so it goes on (I think for the mums I know - this is the hardest part- constantly living surrounded by destruction).

TBH I think you would know if you had a child with ADHD- because you would be begging for help- it goes beyond the bounds of liveliness. Normally the pre-schools pick up on it as well as they just can't get anywhere with the child.

Sleeping problems are common with children with ADHD, not being able to sleep, and waking at night for hours on end.

Hope this doesn't sound too negative to mums of ADHD children- all the kids with ADHD I know are wonderful- just incredibly hard work.

Thank you for your response Jimjams - looks like there aren't many others out there who've had anything to do with this condition I thought more people might have had some experience they could share.

Anyway I really appreciate your input Jimjams, in my heart I don't think my ds is severely affected by anything like that, it's just his hyperactivity and inability to sit still sometimes that make me wonder. I took him to a see a show at the local shopping centre a few weeks ago, and all the kids around ds' age (ranging from about 3-5) were sitting quietly on the floor waiting for the show to start. DS was the only one standing up, then sitting down, then standing up, waiting for it to start - it might have been excitement too, but I really noticed it when he was the only one in the whole group who was doing it. Maybe I should look into it at some point anyway, just to see if there's anything wrong... I'd like to at least put my mind to rest before he starts school. Thanks again.

I just want to echo what jimjams has said. We have just gone through having my stepson misdiagnosed with adhd and I've done quite a bit of research on it. Just because a child is boisterous and can't sit still doesn't mean they have adhd. The symptoms are much more extreme than that and they carry across all of their behavior. You can do some searches online and come up with all sorts of info. Please don't pigeon hole your ds when it sounds like he is just an energetic kid.

My ds has ADHD and from what you have said about your son he sounds like a normal active 4 year old. The fact that he can concentrate for fairly long periods of time, playing with toys and watch tv, is a good indicator that he does not have ADHD. My ds has never been able to play with his toys for any amount of time he would flit from one thing to the other and this was from a very early age. Also you mentioned your ds can listen and respond to instructions, ADHD children can't do this. As for sleeping my ds and his friends, who also have ADHD, haven't seemed to have a problem with this.
There is a really good book written by Steve Biddulph called raising boys. He mentions that at the age of 4 boys receive a sudden surge of testosterone which will make them more active. Maybe this could explain why your ds is being boisterous and doesn't want to sit still for very long.
A friend of mine son went through a stage like this and he was given a spongey ball to hold during story time. It helped him to sit still and listen.

NicO4, I'd just like to echo what everyone else has said. 4 year old boys do tend to be manic for no apparant reason - that surge of testosterone! You can see it at any nursery/pre-school/reception class - the majority of girls sit and do, whilst this whirlwind of little boys whizzes around them! My ds1 (11) has ADHD and was just a nightmare at this age - there is an ADHD thread, probably in the archives somewhere, which lists common traits of ADHD. Just sit and wait it out - if he's still behaving like this when all his peers have calmed down a bit (about 6 or 7), then MAYBE you should have a chat to someone.

Thanks everyone for the replies & thank you Nellie for your post, I know exactly what you mean about your child doing circuits around the room while all the other kids are sitting nicely on the floor... that happened to me quite a lot when ds was younger. It's comforting though to hear other people's experiences and thoughts about this, I guess I'm not sure about ds' behaviour because he's my first child and I don't have anything to compare him to. I know my brother was pretty hyperactive as a child (drove my parents insane) and so was my niece (his daughter), so maybe some of this runs in the family.

Anyway I took ds to another child's party today and watched him quite a lot, he was fairly boisterous at first (there was a lot of testosterone there, about 10 boys of similar ages ) but he settled down fairly quickly & played well for most of the time we were there. He also sat REALLY still for about forty-five minutes while they had a clown show, so that made me feel a bit better, especially when I noticed that a couple of other boys were running around playing during the show.

Myalias, ds has been very active since he was about 18 months old so I don't think I can blame the 4 yr-old testosterone surge! He has always been 'into everything' and has a bad habit of running off whenever we're out. Every time I take him somewhere I say "Stay with me" and within minutes, he's gone. It's driven dh & I up the wall many times in the past and I have disciplined him a lot over it, but he still does it. That's what I mean by impulsive, he knows he shouldn't do it, but he does it anyway. Or maybe it just means that he's extremely determined to have his own way Hopefully he will grow out of it as he gets older, I'll just have to hang in there and hope for the best.