How do you win the battle of the carseat?

[Hedgehogsdontbite]

I'm at breaking point. DS is 2.8 and is now refusing to go in his carseat. He wants to play in the garden when I need to get him to nursery. How do you fold a rigid, screaming, fighting toddler into their seat without bloodshed? This morning took 20 minutes and destroyed me. I don't want to leave him at nursery after such a battle and so many tears.

Any tips?

Does he enjoy nursery? Is it just getting him there?

Often at that age and even school age they are happy with what they are doing and don't want to leave. I found and still do giving plenty of warning that is almost time to go. Saying is 10 minutes to go (sometimes I do this 30 minutes before its actually time to go ). Getting them to tidy up what they are playing with. Making sure they know it'll still be there when they get home.

Or preschool would let them take a favourite toy with them to be left in the special box. This sometimes helped.

The carseat is non negabule but making sure it's still fits and is comfortable. My daughter was winging about hers once and turned out I needed to adjust the straps. She was much happier afterwards.

Biscuits! When you're in the car seat you get your biscuit. Easy

Does she want to climb in herself? Is there anything fun to do in the car? Singing nursery rhymes or a story tape? Toddlers don't like swapping fun activities for boring ones, incentives are best. Even if it's raisins rather than biscuits..

He loves nursery, he just loves a garden full of snow more.

Bribery, I never thought of that. Food won't work but a 'get in your seat and you can play with mummy's phone' might. It'd also allow me to scrape the ice off in peace without 'help'.

DVD player?

In terms of the actual logistics, what I found best was to have one of those pivoting car seats. I swivelled it so it faced the door, extended the arm straps to maximum length, shoved DS into the seat & did up the buckle as at least he was in the seat. It was then a case of pinning his arms down, getting them through the straps & tightening them. Most of the time, DS gave up the fight once his first arm was in.

When our twins were about 2.5 we changed to seats with impact cushions instead of straps and they are much happier with them. They climb in themselves and sit waiting for me to fasten them in. Also we have singalong CDs which they love too

Singalong CDs and allowing them to climb into the car "all by themself". My second daughter was so stubborn that she only ever got into her seat if she was allowed to hop in by herself. If we put her in she would fight fight fight it and wouldn't sit still unless she was allowed to climb all the way out of the car and back in all by herself. Funny memory now but a PITA at the time. She is independent spirited with everything like shoes, car seat, books, bed now at 3.5. And that is a blessing, actually. So my advice is to allow him independence (with you doing the buckle obvs)

"Shhh.... You'll wake the baby!"
It usually confuses them long enough to wonder where the baby is and get them into their seat.

Or

"Oooh look at the bird"

By the time mine was 2.5, I think he had a bigger car seat and there would be two car seats in the back of the car and he could choose which one.

Tell him he can't get into the seat by himself.

My youngest is now nearly 4 and says "Mummy, tell me I can't do X" when he wants to do something

Currently going through this for the second time - 2.5 onwards is the peak time for it I reckon , and the hardest for you because they are so flipping strong at this age ! Agree with pp - bribery with snack or phone/tablet is the only way through it