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Original poster

Untrendy Mum needs advice for DD

27 replies

Sonnet · 08/12/2006 19:18

Hi - please help with some advice....

DD1 is 10 and whilst mature for her age has not yet been concerned about clothes, music etc.
I admit I have tried not to let her grow up too soon but I think that has now backfired and is causing DD problems with her friends - they all seem to be getting in to clothes, music etc and she is feeling very left behind and left out.
we have just had a real heart to heart chat and unknown to her I am in tears...but I don't know how to help...
I wear dull "boden" as it is easy to buy (internet)and never browse in town. I listen to middle of the road music - how dull

So all you mums of preteen DD's:
Where would you recommed we shop together for clothes?
What music is trendy????
The xmas disco is next week and I have promised her a new outfit but don't know where to start - she isn't sure either......
Please please help...
Sonnet xx

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Boobooroastingonanopenfire · 08/12/2006 19:22

Aww! Sorry for the soppy start, but this is such a sweet post, and I'm pregnant and hormonal.

You can get some nice bits for ten-year olds in Next. Obviously Top Shop is trendier, but the clothes are a bit adult really.

Try a few Department Stores. Debenhams is good, as they have lots of concessions, so you get a cross-section.

Hope you find something lovely and trendy! (leg-warmers are cool right now).

bubbles4 · 08/12/2006 19:23

my dd is 9 and like you i dont want her growing up too quickly,i buy her clothes we both like but wont give in to clothes that are made in her size but that are really too grown up for her, music wise " high school musical" dvd is all the rage so a copy of that for xmas should go down a treat, good luck.

Boobooroastingonanopenfire · 08/12/2006 19:24

Yeah, but you can get a trendy manga-themed t-shirt, jeans, leg-warmers and pixie boots. Not sexing them up or anything, just helping them to fit in.

foxinsocks · 08/12/2006 19:25

awww sonnet, your post melted my heart

I don't have a pre-teen but I'm sure I'm very untrendy so don't feel you're alone. Hope you have a great time shopping together.

Tinker · 08/12/2006 19:25

Ah sonnet, you sound lovely.

I'm no fashion icon but my 9 year old wants footless tights, a ra-ra skirt and ballet pumps for xmas. I've actually seen a ra ra skirt in Boden! H&M can be good - hit and miss, I find. Also, Zara. Etam used to have Tammy Girl but think closed down. Next? Gap?

Music - what about Girls Aloud and Sugababes best of cds?

Mine isn't really into music yet but the clothes thing is starting. Difficult, don't want them to be left out but don't want them looking like tarts either.

flowertot · 08/12/2006 19:26

H&M is your best bet I think. Reasonable prices, fashionable enough to fit in with everyone els, but plenty of choice so hopefully you can agree on something you both like

Tinker · 08/12/2006 19:27

Oh yes to High School Musical - she's watching it now.

pelvicfloorSNOWmore · 08/12/2006 19:27

H&M do some great clothes for girls and Next do some trendy stuff too.My dd's are 5 and 11 months so are not really into fashion but i buy some of their stuff from there and imagine doing so when they are older.Also primark are fab! you could get her some nice accessories from there or if you dont fancy that then Claires do some lovely stuff.

Original poster
Sonnet · 08/12/2006 19:27

Thanks so much BBroastingonanopenfire and bubbles4...
whats a manga themed tshirt?
I don't want her ending up like me - always on the outside, never on the in...

OP posts:
WelshBoris · 08/12/2006 19:28

My boyfriends DD is 9, and is really funky.

New Look now do trendy clothes for pre-teens
Jeans and a sparkly top from there, Next or George
Make sure she tries the clothes on, to see if they fit her obviously and to see if she is comfortable in them.

It doesnt have to be a dress or skirt to look cool.

Music-
High School Musical
Lil Chris
Rhianna
McFly

She also likes Me To You teddy things and Hello Kitty things

Anything else please ask, I have become an expert on 9 year olds!!

Tinker · 08/12/2006 19:29

Girls like simple red/white plastic long bead necklaces atm as well

lanismum · 08/12/2006 19:29

you should be able to get her some nice clothes in H&M, or new look (i think they have a younger girls section)
my dd is only a baby, so not sure if my other ideas are too grown up, but what about taking her to a hairdressers to get her hair washed and dried to make her feel special, and some clear glittery nail varnish? some chunky beads/bracelets?
hope she has a lovely time at the xmas disco!

Boobooroastingonanopenfire · 08/12/2006 19:30

Manga is Japanese animation - very cool to have a t-shirt with this kind of motif on it. Maybe you could order one online?

I hate shopping, especially this time of year.

And Boden is nice!

Original poster
Sonnet · 08/12/2006 19:31

Thank you all - yes I do so want her to fit in...

Tinker - I think my problem is I don't know how to put outfits together - DD said she would like footless tights but didn't know what to put them with - couldn't find any in next...think I need to find the time to browse the shops
H&m I'll try - thanks

She is into high school musical and has the CD - the other CD's sound good

I think we need to spend some time together

OP posts:
DizzyBinterWonderland · 08/12/2006 19:32

she'll probably like to go bonkers in claire's accessories too.

Original poster
Sonnet · 08/12/2006 19:35

gosh - so many responses you are all making me more emotional!!!!
Music ideas - will check out
Not wanting to seem ungratful but need to dash and put DD2 to bed - will check back later
I am smiling now!!!

OP posts:
Tinker · 08/12/2006 19:35

Claire's is great.

This kind of thing is quite nice if she's quite girly?

Boobooroastingonanopenfire · 08/12/2006 19:36

Footless tights go with ballet pumps and
Ra-ra skirts (as Tinker's DD knows!).

Tinker · 08/12/2006 19:38

footless tights outfit

WelshBoris · 08/12/2006 19:41

Footless tights go with denim skirts aswell

and ballet pumps

poinsettydog · 08/12/2006 20:07

Sonnet!

I've had some fashion catching up to do as well over the last year ever since I gave dd1 (10)an unmatching outfit to wear to a poxy dance competition at school. She was ribbed mercilessly about it.

Don't worry. Get her some fashionable things now and any faux pas will soon be forgotten by fickle friends.

Look at the websites of next and other preteen clothes stores. They'll give you ideas of the sorts of things to buy. Look at them with dd and she should be able to point out a few things she's seen others wear. You'll figure it out together and a lovely muddled-fashion bond will form!

Original poster
Sonnet · 11/12/2006 11:38

Thank-you so much to you all for responding....
DD1 and I went shopping on Saturday and purchased
a fab outfit for the disco ( mini skirt, footless tights, ballet pumps, and a sparkly T.shirt) also purchased some "skinny" jeans and a dress plus 2 other tops longish tops that look good with the jeans. She can also wear the leggings with the dress, oh and another pair of shoes!! She is so happy and looks fab..... so thank-you thank-you thank-you for listening to me in my desperation!

We had such a fab time that we have planned a girly shopping trip in the feb half term!!

OP posts:
poinsettydog · 11/12/2006 17:01

Aw! May you shop in fashion hell together for ever more

PartridgeinaRustyBearTree · 11/12/2006 18:02

"don't want her ending up like me - always on the outside, never on the in..."
I wouldn't worry about that to much Sonnet - I'm so unstylish I actually wear a shirt open over a T-shirt, which according to Cod is the height of no-style, but DD has an incredible sense of style - all her own work

Tinker · 11/12/2006 19:10

Oh Sonnet, was wondering today how you'd got on. Which shops did you go to?