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Feeling very disappointed in myself - related to swimming class progression

9 replies

madeitagain · 19/10/2015 19:54

This evening my child had an assessment class where the swimming coach (whom I think is very good) assessed the children in preparation for rearranging classes for next term. My son doesn't treat swimming lessons with much seriousness or attentiveness. I have spoken to him about this but haven't managed to see much progress in his concentration level. He is six.
Tonight as always I told him to listen to what the instructor said and do what he is asked to do. He didn't. He was clowning around and trying to make other children laugh. When the coach was explaining each different instruction he was distracted and at one stage had his head under the water when the coach was explaining things. I reprimanded him a couple of times as did the coach.

I felt upset and angry with my son.. Anyway he didn't do very well although I know he can do various things quite well. When they were asked to do front crawl he removed his goggles and couldn't put his head in ................
I was so angry with him. I think my reaction may have been over the top and I feel like crap. I told him I was very angry with him and that he would now he in a class with all the younger children. This is true the coach gave the assessment at the end of class. I told him his friend from the swimming class would no longer be in his class because he listens and had gone up to the next level.
I am writing all this down basically because I feel like a shit mother (at the moment).

OP posts:
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VenusRising · 19/10/2015 19:58

He's only six. And he will do very well in the class with younger children until he can learn how to learn.

Sounds like a maturity issue. Some kids just don't learn until they're older.

You are not a crap parent- a crap parent is someone who doesn't care if they're child swims or drowns.

I'd not sit by the pool if I was you. Use the time to go for a walk.

lastuseraccount123 · 19/10/2015 20:00

Wine and Flowers

been there. I had the social butterfly kid who arsed around and didn't listen, but i had to remind myself that it really doesn't matter, cos it doesn't. But I found it frustrating watching others go up and her not - yes.

i actually ended up pulling her out of swimming until she matured a bit more - then she raced through three levels one after the other because she really wanted to learn.

VenusRising · 19/10/2015 20:00

their kids that is, blardy autocorrect

WipsGlitter · 19/10/2015 20:08

How many kids in the lesson? Can you switch teachers?

DS is the same. So busy gassing to his friends and not paying attention. But he's happy.

Agree though it's annoying when you're paying for something and they're not even trying.

waitforrose · 20/10/2015 09:50

How many are in the group? My son is 1 of 5. They all take it in turns so most of his time is spent waiting for the others to do their bit, being told to hold on to the side and not muck around. I have spent hundreds!!! to watch him remain at the same level. But tbh, it's just not very engaging, at most intermittently engaging. Lots of boys fidget and get distracted. I think they tune out because basically 80% of the teacher's words are directed at the others. Private 1-1 lessons would definitely help I imagine, but are expensive. We switched to a male teacher and it made all the difference!

Ferguson · 20/10/2015 18:44

What is it with SO MANY PARENTS and Swimming Lessons.?!

If he doesn't want to swim, DON'T TRY TO MAKE HIM for now!

Smartiepants79 · 20/10/2015 18:54

Swimming is an important life skill in many people's opinion. That's why so many parents consider it important that their children learn to swim.
I'd have been angry too, it's the wasted money as well as the wasted opportunity.
I'd give him one more go in that class and then maybe think again. Maybe being in a class on his own with a whole lot of younger kids might be the motivation he needs.

Ferguson · 20/10/2015 22:54

I agree it is USEFUL to learn to swim, but it isn't essential at 5 or 6! I was taught at primary school, probably around age 8 or 9.

DeliveredByKiki · 25/10/2015 14:40

I know how you feel - FWIW we live by the beach and are regularly in the ocean and DS wants to learn to surf so we want to get them safely swimming asap but actually it's up to when you educate your children to swim and it sounds like it's not that he doesn't want but he doesn't have the maturity to learn in a group setting.

My DS was the same (though younger but reiterating we need our kids swimming confidently here), so we swallowed the cost and booked him into private one on one lessons. It's been worth it from our POV, he has to concentrate because there's only him being focused on, there's nobody else to prat around with. He loves swimming now and actually it's made an improvement generally on his listening and concentrating skills in smaller group settings. If you can bear it, it might be worth looking into?

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