Almost 3 year old obsessions - normal?

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Dc2 appears to be NT in every respect except for his fascination with shapes.

As soon as he knew basic shape names at around 14 months and could chat away (he developed good conversation youngish) about them. He would talk about his environment in terms of shapes - identifying them everywhere.

Until recently it seemed like an unusual interest and I found it sweet and amusing, but now it's gone through the roof...He sings about them, draws them, makes them out of playdoh, traces them with his finger in the air, collects them, talks to them, puts them to bed etc. Basically he get enough of shapes. He knows many of the more advanced shapes (my fault in that I've introduced them) and identifies types of triangle, asks me to draw dodecagon's, rectangular prisms etc etc

Amost two years after this began it is more intense than ever.

The only time he doesn't talk about shapes is when he is playing in a park or garden.

It is almost as if he sees the world in shapes. But more than that he loves loves loves them.

Any thoughts? I haven't been concerned at all until recently because he is more preoccupied than ever.

He has an uncle with Aspergers but I can't discern any other traits in my son.

Otherwise he is an ordinary child...He has very good fine motor skills (cuts out with scissors 5cm stars surprising well), a good vocabulary, very conversational, extroverted, loves company, lots of eye contact etc. He is starting to write numbers and letters (soon switches to shapes) but I wouldn't say he is unusually advanced.

Should I be encouraging discouraging? It is at a point where I'm starting to feel it is way too much and not 'healthy'

Usborne lift the flaps books are great and while they're a bit advanced for him atm, my dc loved them from toddlers onwards and they've grown with them. The flaps and the peering inside can be age-appropriate if you sit and look with them and explain stuff in an age-appropriate way and there's a fab See Inside Space one here which my dc both loved from 3ish onwards. In fact, they loved all of them and at 4 and 8, they still get them out very regularly as a refresher.

We have a great glow in the dark planets set too which we bought from Waitrose. They hang on the dc's ceiling along with glow in the dark stars (I change the constellation regularly as I'm a wanker ).

We have a See Inside the Universe one too which he'd probably like.

Some of this could be amusing - though, for me, some bits didn't seem to work. (Could be because we use Linux.) :

www.esa.int/esaKIDSen/SEMHNTRZ5BG_index_0.html

Thank you so much for the messages which I have just seen. I will look over them again later and check the links. I appreciate the input very much. I will take on board some of these suggestions and see where it takes us.

Sgoinneal - nice to meet you

My son is also two but coming up for three. But this started when he was one and it has recently escalated. I am not exactly worried but I'm starting to think it is not ordinary behaviour and its flagging a concern for me. However I am going to do more 1:1 play with him and see where this gets us.

I will be offline a lot this week, but whatever I will be sure to update, especially when he goes to nursery, in case it helps anyone. I have found lots of anecdotes online but all of the 'shape obsessed' kids have other ASD traits that my boy doesn't share.

I wonder Sgoinneal if you have had your DC's eyes checked, my dd has worn glasses since she was 18 months so I am conscious of eyes.

I'm on my phone so will keep this brief, my ds, similar age, has a similar obsession with trains and more importantly train track. Really really obsessed. At nursery they've said that some children do just adopt these obsessions and interpret lots of their world through them. Google 'schemas' (might be learning schemas or early learning schemas).

Wotamidoing - yes thank you. I need to read around the subject more but this may actually explain things for us.

If you find yourself worrying about whether it's aspergers, I'd really recommend Misdiagnosis and dual diagnoses of gifted children and adults - it's a really interesting read. In one chapter, it describes characteristics which both gifted children and those with aspergers share, and also ways to distinguish between the conditions.

They say that the keys to differentiating are:

1. How the child interacts socially with others who share their interest: a child with aspergers will usually struggle socially with all peers, whereas a gifted child will get on well with some
2. Their insight into how others see them.

Specifically regarding obsessions: if a child is aware of and able to change their focus, shows some insight into why it's a problem (perhaps a bit older than your DS for that!) and shows good social skills with children who share his interests, then it's unlikely to be aspergers.

A few of the behaviours they list as being incompatible with a diagnosis of aspergers (paraphrasing a few which are appropriate to your DS's age) are:
-comfortable with unstructured situations and innovative activities, and tolerates abrupt changes in routine
-displays appropriate emotion
-can display empathy and sympathy in many situations
-understands and uses humour that involves social reciprocity (I'm assuming that includes those toddler moments when you blow raspberries back and forth at each other, with the giggles escalating!)

Something else which that book really clarified for me is that aspergers is characterised by an inability to generalise and use abstract thinking. The lack of flexibility - and freaking out when tiny things are different - are because to a child who can't generalise, the slightest difference turns it into a completely novel situation. In fact, a lot of the behaviours make sense when looked at in that light. Is your DS is able to make leaps of understanding where he relates what he is doing to something else or a previous experience? That would also seem to point away from aspergers.

Hi I'm a bit late to the conversation but I have a dd, almost 3 who has some similar behaviours. Her obsessions are jigsaw puzzles and numbers and she also spends most of her day on these things.
She also presents as NT in every other way, sociable, loves a little party, enjoys singing and dancing and does do other activities but gravitates toward jigsaws and talking about numbers - looking for them everywhere we go and doing sums like 'there are 8 trees mummy, if you don't look at 2 there are 6' I've worried, like you, about aspergers and OcD has also crossed my mind. I have had 3 different health visitors to see her and they have all said 'wait and watch although we don't think there is a problem based on her other behaviours'. They have all said they think she is probably gifted at mathematics rather than autistic but not to fret as its too early for diagnosis or worry. I have since just embraced her quirks, and am enjoying watching her grow up in her own special way

Toastandmarmalade - thanks so much for taking the time to post. This book and the very section you so kindly summarised is referred to on a thread in G&T about asd/gifted boys. I had wanted to know more! Thanks so much.

Just thought to update my thread just in case it helps someone.

When I posted in October, this was the peak of the obsession. It started to subside in the half term. Then over the holidays in December it was fading away more and it no doubt helped that he once again had his sister to play with. Now the shapes are in the background but something tells me it will always be a love of his. We are onto dinosaurs and it's a bit more balanced. Preschool has gone very well, he loves the shapes there (it's Montessori so they have lots of geometric models on display) but he enjoys lots of different activities and mixes well.

He may just grow up to be an architect or engineer.

If he's happy and it's not impeding him, I wouldn't worry too much. This is the age that some kids de use they're a dog for a few months!