preschooler hates preschool

[fifthcupofcoffee]

DS1 is a generally lovely and happy little boy (age 4). He is bright and sociable and although has the standard issues for age around food/tantrums etc, he's generally doing well...EXCEPT he kicks up a huge fuss when dropped off at preschool. He goes there for a 'school day' (9-3) and has been going to the same place for more than a year. Some morning are fine but the majority involve tears and upset. The preschool staff say that generally he is very happy and calms down once I've left. He's always had a good day when I go to collect him.

The question I'm asking is whether anyone has had a similar experience and has advice on making drop-off less stressful for both of us.

My guess? Since he has a fine time once you've left, this is him trying to see what reaction he can provoke from you. Do you get teary-eyed and sad, give him extra reassurances because of his crying, and so on? If so, you're probably the root cause.

Keep in mind, he has no understanding of how economics and budgeting work, or why you have to go to work in the first place. From his point of view, doing nearly anything to elicit a sad or guilty reaction from you is worth it, because he wants you to keep him with you, and if he can't have that, he wants the extra cuddles and reassurance that his behavior has brought him.

I am very matter of fact in the morning. There is a routine and I stick to it. DH drives me mad when he just does his own thing and then complains that DD was clinging to his leg for half an hour.