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Defiant, screaming 2.5 year old, also happy to sit in poo all day!

4 replies

PeggyL · 17/09/2015 14:21

I am at the end of my tether, I feel so bad, I have just called my DD a horrible child ?? I understand the terrible twos, my DS is 5, but DD just seems to be far worse than he was. Seems to say/want opposite to everyone else, unreasonable, rude, does nothing she is told, but the worst thing is around nappies. She has done a couple of wees on the potty but says she doesn't want to wear pants etc and doesn't want to use toilet/potty that much unless her brother is so I haven't pushed her, I just say things like 'let me know if you need a wee/poo' or when it's happened I just say 'let me know next time', but have kept it really light and no pressure or chastising. But the real problem is having her bottom changed at all, hates me changing her nappy. When she's done a poo she denies it, totally freaks out when I say it needs changing and won't let me. Depending on her mood and what we're doing, I may leave it for a little bit and then try and suggest it again, sometimes she is fine with it but mostly not. The last 3 days she has gone absolutely mad at me, screaming and shouting at me to leave her alone, telling me she hates me and that she is happy to sit in a dirty nappy and doesn't want it changed. Problem is she gets soooo sore with it unchanged, not to mention it smells and can leak obviously. Have just and a major battle to get this one off her and now she won't let me put a new one on and has run off. I feel so bad for calling her a horrible child and I just told her to go away, so upsetting as I would never talk to anyone lies that, let alone a child I adore....any advice?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
JiltedJohnsJulie · 17/09/2015 17:50

Firstly, I'd forget potty training for a while. Just leave her in nappies and don't mention the potty.

As for the poo in the nappy. Are you using metanium? It's great. Calmly explain to her that if she doesn't want her nappy changing then she needs to poo and wee on the potty.

Have you tried offering a bribe if she gets changed calmly? Smile

amarmai · 22/09/2015 18:59

stars on a chart for any approach towards the goal you want and rewards after small amount eg 4/5 and big fuss for anything +ve and school yourself to show no _ve eg sing a song ,distract yourself as they can read us like a book!

Hootytoot · 23/09/2015 20:50

We have been making it 'fun' whenever dS goes through a stage like this. 'Flying' him to the changing mat. Or hiding it somewhere strange and gettinh him to find it. Getting the nappy to beg him not to sit on them (he loves sitting on them then!) having a special video he can watch on iPad while I change him. We just have to make up new fun things every time he goes through a stage, Inbetween its fine!

BarbarianMum · 25/09/2015 16:44

The day ds1 refused to put a nappy on was the day I started potty training him. He was 2.5 too. If you do take this opportunity though, don't make it a fight because it is one only your dd can win. Don't try taking her to the loo regularly or even reminding her very much as it sounds like she'd kick against that. As her understanding is good, maybe leave her too it, or get her db to take her too the loo. We found a mixture of bribery for successes (jelly tots) and boredom for accidents (minimal attention) worked well.

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